Turbulent Teens

“Teen Myth: Everyone is prettier, cuter, having more fun, finding love, and is going to top colleges, except for me. I am the loser”

When Vedanta 17, spoke with us about her self-doubt and self-loathing, she was scrolling through her social media feed for 6 hours a day and had fed herself the story of not being good enough.

Before social media, celebrities set impossible standards, but they were distant, celluloid and perhaps not all that real.?

Now you have your classmates, friends you played with all your life who seemingly have a perfect life, always.

Teen years are a powder keg of vulnerabilities, insecurities and the need to compare topped off with low emotion regulation.

Any visual or verbal comments only serve to make things worse. And if you thought this eases after high school, you couldn’t be more wrong. The pressure only gets worse in college.

Researchers at Stanford University call it the Duck Syndrome. The pressure to be seen gliding through life looking perfect while your feet work overtime frantically.

Teens are highly attuned to social cues. I remember hours that I would spend with friends playing or just hanging out. While it was called waste of time, it was like most healthy teens trying out new ideas, styles of interaction.

Now this has been replaced with texting, DMs and sharing of content which in turn does not given them the full effect of visual and verbal cues. They end up making assumptions about social responses.

At?Skooc, apart from a customised approach to every child’s condition and intensity, we also tell parents to

1. Take your child out of home for more face-to-face interactions. It’s like going back to setting play dates again and will eat into your time, but it’s an effort that will be worth the inconvenience

2. Work with your child to help get them time off their social media apps. That means you will need to as well. Again, tough to do but for both of you, it is an exercise that will give you benefits directly by way of happiness?

3. Give your child an avenue to talk. Teens are masters of suppressing their thoughts and fears. A neutral space with a counsellor will only help the think aloud and reflect and course correct their thoughts.

Rebuilding self-esteem is a daunting task?and being proactive with reaching out for help will only help avoid a descent into poor mental health.

#mentalhealth?#teenmentalhealth?#parenting

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Devi Mani

Founder & CEO

Skooc.com