Tuesday Thoughts | 3 January 2023 | The Happiness Formula

Happy New Year! If you are anything like me, you’ve been asking yourself some fundamental questions about what you want to do with the next spin around the sun. And, even if you haven’t consciously asked yourself, you are probably ultimately trying to figure out what would make you happy.

Even Scrooge didn’t really want to be rich and miserable, and after nearly three years of varying levels of social distancing, I think that most of us (even this introvert) are thinking more and more about what we can do to live in community with others, and less and less about simply reaching individual (dare I say selfish) goals.

So, the big question as we set our goals, and resolutions, and intentions for the year, is: how do I bring Joy and Happiness into my life in 2023? What actual things can I do to be Happy?

Well, you’re in luck because I know the secret to happiness, my Uncle told me, after someone told him, and now I’m telling you. The secret to happiness is – something to do, something to look forward to, and someone to love. That’s really it, although simple, it takes intentionality and work.

It’s been close to two decades since I first learned of this idea, and I have taken it to heart – at least so much as I can control (more on that later).

I always make sure that I am asking myself what are you going to do? How will you keep yourself busy? What can you do to make sure that you have purpose and that life has meaning? This isn’t to say that I don’t take breaks, I do, because burnout is real. My motto – everyone must serve – really comes into play, as at its essence, purpose is rarely a solo sport.

My “something to do” is something I think about regularly, sometimes daily. And, because I believe in reciprocity, I also often reflect on not taking away someone else’s something to do. You should avoid taking away a task that would bring someone else a sense of accomplishment, unless there is an urgent need to do so, or if leaving it for someone else endangers them in some way.

Similarly, I try to make sure that I always have something to look forward to – or rather somethings to look forward to. Again, these are regular reflections, I look for small things in my days and weeks, a great meal I can’t wait to eat, some art I can’t wait to see or hear or make, a scheduled meet-up with an old friend; and I try to make sure that there is always a big “something to look forward to” in the calendar – a trip, a birthday, an event that I’m excited to attend.

The thing I find much harder to will into being is the third element – “someone to love” – it has largely eluded me; but I have remained undeterred. I have focused on my number one priority – family (the one's bound by blood and the ones I chose) – people I love dearly, choosing to at least for a time complete the equation with a broader interpretation of someone to love.

One thing is certain, each piece of the Happiness Formula relies heavily on relationships, and community, and – simply put – having people in our lives. So, as I set my 2023 intention to seek out Happiness, I am refocusing on the importance of forming and maintaining relationships, because while you need to be able to sit comfortably in your own company, life really is a team sport.

As I look at my goals and resolutions I am asking myself a couple of fundamental questions; 1 – what do I have to build into my action plans to centre myself in community; and 2 – am I ensuring that when I identify my priorities, I am giving appropriate weight to the people involved?

Finally, I continue to work on myself, to be the best version of myself, to set the intention to lead with empathy and kindness, to be of value to those who enter my life and to focus on reciprocity; because the only strategy I have for attracting someone(s) to love into my life, is to be the sort of person who is a net positive when added to someone else’s life.

My Call to Action This Week: is kinda simple, to actively pursue the Happiness Formula, find your something to do, your something to look forward to, and your someone to love; by centring relationships in your goal and intention setting for 2023.

--

If you want to go fast, go alone; if you want to go far, go together. Tuesday Thoughts is a community, if it was just me and my thoughts it would not be on my weekly list of somethings to do; please use the comments to tell me what you’re working on that can be made better by the inclusion of someone else in this community – you never know, you might just find someone to love (likely in a highly platonic sense, but that’s still a net positive for your life).

New and Noteworthy is a collection of things readers of?#TuesdayThoughts?might find interesting, important, or informative;

??What to Watch:?Why good leaders make you feel safe - a TED talk by Simon Sinek

??What to Read:?Top 10 Things Association CEOs Must Never Forget by Claude Paul Boivin in the CSAE Blog h/t Jacqui D'Eon | Which association orthodox beliefs will you confront in 2023? from Jeff De Cagna | Supporting non-charities is about to get easier. Why should funders consider it? from Imagine Canada | A post on Pay Equity in Speaking Engagements from Tara Robertson | Changing the story: The Canada-wide push to recognize workers in the non-profit sector from the Philanthropist Journal h/t Rickesh Lakhani | LinkedIn at 20: How a new breed of influencer is transforming the business networking giant from the Deccan Herald

????What to Do:?Nominate someone for Season Four of the Intersection Podcast | Take the NYT Quiz on Inclusive Language You Can't Say That! (Or Can You?) h/t Michelle Grocholsky | Register to attend Destination Direct during Ottawa Meet Week

????♀?Cool Jobs (Paid and Volunteer):?Board of Trustees @ CAMH | Vice President of Member Services?@ Ontario Chamber of Commerce

??Take Note:?Some clarity from Robert Patzelt on how and when to use a Motion to Adjourn

Join my community, where?I Connect People and Ideas. Use?#TuesdayThoughts?to share this edition of the Newsletter with your networks.

LinkedIn?Danielle S. Russell, CAE (she/her)?| Instagram ???@danielle.s.russell?| Twitter?@dani__russell?|?YouTube???One Woman Island

??I am a Certified Association Executive with nearly over a dozen years of experience in leadership positions in Canada's Not-for-Profit Sector; as a College Professor, occasional Speaker, and contributor to blogs, newsletters, and media, I am skilled at using the art of storytelling to explain my ideas and inform audiences and readers on a variety of topics.

??♀?I am also a Certified Organizational Specialist and Practical Minimalist, who happens to have an unhealthy love for Excel Spreadsheets. I don't do this work often, but I am always happy to give a bit of advice if you are struggling.

??Did you know I also paint and draw? I am passionate about the benefits of Adult Colouring, and can create custom colouring sheets for speech and workshop audiences, by request.

Not-for-Profit Consulting Services?(pdf) | Check Out my website?daniellerussell.ca