How to get back “on” after falling off the wagon?

Staying on track is pretty straightforward.

We've already spoken at length about the numerous ways you would start on the journey of self-improvement. As well as the various techniques and practices you should do to stay on track.

But what if you lost your way after finding it?

What if after slowly building the life you envision, you mess up, and witness everything you've been building collapse in front of you?

Finding your way back after a detour isn't so straightforward

Whether it’s a big or small setback, it can be hard to get back in the saddle and keep going.?

But no matter what life throws at us, we must remain resilient and not let our failures define us.

I've had to face a number of obstacles in my life, from getting back in shape after being overweight for years to dealing with an arrest that could have potentially derailed my future. Despite these setbacks, I used self-compassion, gratitude and resilience as my guiding principles.?

It wasn't easy, but with dedication and determination it was possible for me to overcome the odds and become successful. The journey has taught me that no matter what life throws at you, by staying focused on yourself and your vision you can overcome anything.

In this week's newsletter, I'm going to show you how to get back on the horse with courage and determination so that you can continue down your path to growth and success.

Let's dive in.

Overcoming Inertia: Battling the Challenges of Getting Back On Track

One of the many unexpected hurdles that we face when trying to get back "on" after falling off the wagon is how hard it is to stop a moving vehicle. It's like an invisible force pushing us back into our old behaviors and habits.

Inertia can be best described as the tendency of a body in motion to stay in motion, or for something at rest to stay at rest, unless and until some external force acts upon it. In terms of getting back on track after falling off the wagon, inertia can be seen as a force that pulls us away from what's right and proper in favor of our past habits.

Imagine you're going down the Interstate, going 60 mph, and you miss your exit. What do you do? You could slam the brakes and quickly turn a 90-degree angle to get back on the track, but that would cost you so much more energy than if you were to continue down the wrong road and take the next exit.

The same thing can happen when we try to make changes in our lives. We have a goal or destination, but it's easier to stay on the wrong path we're used to and just keep going. And so we continue on, with inertia keeping us away from our desired outcomes. The only way to get back to our goal is to push ourselves and overcome the inertia by making a conscious effort to make changes. It's not easy, but it's worth it in the end.

Getting back on track is always going to need more energy and willpower than actually continuing down the wrong path.?

The "Missed Exit" scenario mirrors what all of us go through when we've lost our way. We continue on the wrong trajectory because it would cost us so much more than if we suddenly hit the brakes, and try to get back on track.?

And of course, the longer you stay down the wrong road, the much harder it will be for you to get back on.

The opposite is also true, which is why staying on the right track is much easier than finding it.?

Picture the graph above, and consider the path we take on the journey to becoming our best-selves. Whenever you’re starting on a new path, you often feel your development is going rather quickly.?

As Paulo Coelho said in The Alchemist, “Because there is a force that wants you to realize your Personal Legend, it whets your appetite with a taste of success....”

The universe is rewarding you for starting on the right track, and gives you a boost of confidence to show you that what you seek is within your grasp.

Then, this growing confidence comes crashing down the moment you hit the realization that the end goal isn’t as close as you imagined it to be.

And after stumbling or facing a setback you wallow in the valley of despair for a while. And this is why it’s so difficult to get back on track.

Because while you’re at the valley of despair, you’re at your lowest point. The farthest you’ll ever be from getting back on track.?

In fact, finding your way back again might even seem impossible. This is due to the fact that as soon as you fall, the climb back up seems to be much longer and slower this time. There’s no easy way to get out of this valley.

Which circles back to inertia: the moment you start falling down the wrong path, inertia will make it much easier for you to continue going down the wrong path.

Now let me show how you can overcome the inertia down the wrong path to get back on track.

Step 1: Reframe Your Perspective?

When things don’t go the way we plan, it can be easy to fall into a negative spiral of emotions. But by taking the time to reflect on why something didn’t work out and what lessons you can learn from it, you can start to see failure in a more constructive light

According to Kristin Neff there are three essentials components to practicing self-compassion in moments like these:

• Mindfulness: “I fell off the wagon. I failed. In this moment I am struggling”. Acknowledge that you have patterns, behaviors, and negative beliefs about yourself. Be mindful not to either exaggerate them, which can lead to self-pity, nor suppress them – instead simply observe them, without judgment. Just because you failed doesn’t make you a failure. It just ‘is’.?
• Common humanity: “I am human. Everyone falls off the wagon at some point”. Others have these experiences too, it’s part of the human condition. Humanity is interconnected. You are not alone in experiencing this. Recognize that failure is an essential part of any journey to success. It’s natural to feel discouraged or overwhelmed when things don’t go according to plan.
• Self-Kindness: “May I be kind to myself. May I give myself the compassion that I need”. When you fall off the wagon, be kind and understanding to yourself. A useful trick is to try speaking to yourself like you would speak to a loved one or best friend.?

Practicing self-compassion can allow you to reframe any setbacks or failures as an opportunity for growth.???

Step 2: Self-Reflection

It’s also important to practice self-reflection, which involves looking inward to understand your values, unique gifts, ultimate vision, and motivations. When you know why you do the things that you do, it makes it easier for you to make decisions that align with your authentic self.

Try doing the following:

• Take some time out of your day to sit in silence, free from distractions, and contemplate who you are and what drives you. Reflect on where you are right now and why you are feeling the way you do.
• Write down your thoughts and existential questions like “What is my purpose in life?” as this gives you an opportunity to express yourself without fear of judgment—and answer them honestly to gain insight into your motivations and behavior. Capturing these responses in a journal or notebook allows you to reflect back on them at a later date. This will help you understand how far you’ve come and what needs to be done in order to achieve your goals.
• Finally, create an action plan inspired by your self-reflection. Set out 1 or 2 small achievable goals that can help propel you towards bigger ones. Reward yourself for progress along the way.

Self-reflection isn’t easy, but it's worth the effort if you want to make conscious decisions to get back on track and bring you closer to achieving your goals.

Step 3: Start Small

Having realistic expectations is essential when getting back on track. It can be tempting to set lofty goals or take on too many tasks at once, but this only sets us up for failure. Setting smaller but achievable goals helps build momentum while still allowing us to make progress in our journey toward success.

For people who’ve lived a life of overachieving, this can prove difficult...

Here’s how you can overcome that:

• Step out of your comfort zone and set realistic goals that you can achieve in the short term. This will give you a sense of accomplishment and encourage you to strive for more. Then, break down your longer-term goals into smaller steps - this will help ensure that each step is manageable and achievable.
• Develop habits and routines focused on making progress towards those goals, no matter how small. Taking consistent action will help you stay motivated, even when progress feels slow. As you reach each milestone, take a moment to acknowledge and appreciate your success before tackling the next step.
• Celebrate milestones, big or small, as this will help to maintain your enthusiasm and keep you motivated on your journey toward success. It’s important to stay positive and remember that what you appreciate, appreciates in value.
• Finally, keep track of your progress so that you can clearly see how far you have come and how much closer you are to achieving your goal. This will help to give a sense of direction and purpose to your daily efforts.

Step 4: Find Your Tribe

Finally, surrounding yourself with supportive people who are committed to helping you reach your objectives is one of the most powerful ways to get back on track after a setback.?

Having someone there who will give compassionate feedback without judging or criticizing can be incredibly valuable during times of difficulty. This type of support system will not only help lift your spirits when times are tough but also provide valuable guidance and motivation when needed most. This can be friends, family or even a mentor who has walked this path before. Whatever it is, make sure you cultivate relationships that will help you reach your goal.?

Here’s how you can start:

• Reach out to people in your network who are also working towards similar goals and build relationships based on understanding, support, and accountability.
• Join online or in real-life communities of like-minded people - such as the Empowered Achiever Community - where you can find peers who will provide valuable feedback, motivation to get back on track when you inevitably stumble.
• Develop meaningful relationships with a few key people in these communities who share your vision and ambitions.
• Book a free consultation for a chance to join the Empowered Achiever Community and start connecting with like-minded individuals who want to help each other reclaim their purpose and achieve their goals!

Conclusion

Remember– setbacks are inevitable but they don’t have to define us or prevent us from achieving our goals.

Use these steps to get your bottom back in the saddle!

With resilience, determination, and these helpful strategies in mind– nothing is impossible!

PS. What resonated most with you in the steps above? Comment below???