Try Sharing

It’s one of the first lessons we learn. Don’t be selfish. Let others use what you have. Reciprocate. We understand the purpose of sharing and we understand its benefits. Sharing dictates how we form relationships as children and teaches us about human interaction. It’s a huge part of growing up. It’s become a small part of being a grown up.

Vulnerability is scary. Our lives are centred around judgement whether we believe it or not. We behave based on the anticipated reactions of others rather than our own beliefs. Our society is now public, for better and for worse, with our decisions being made not based on our intentions but on their implications within a greater social context. We’re doing it for the ‘gram.

We know how curated Instagram feeds are, and we’re still affected. My profile consists of only the coolest shit I’m doing, and so does yours. Take the dopamine hit, that’s fine. Let’s not ditch the concept of short-term reward, but rather spend a little more time focusing on long-term reward; a more sincere form of happiness.

One word means a lot. Share. It takes many forms, and they all allow you to connect. Sharing shows that you’re confident in yourself and your surroundings and that you’re able to shift your focus to the well-being of others. Sharing takes many forms, all of which allow us to connect and express our vulnerability — something that we lack in this time of judgement. Pick one (or more) that works for you.

Share Your Ideas

Your ideas aren’t so special that someone’s going to steal them and make millions off of them. If that’s the case, you should be executing. Of course, there are ideas that you need to keep close to the vest, but sharing ideas allows for collaboration. It allows others to ask “what if, what if, and what if…?” People are far more likely to aid in developing and supporting your ideas than to steal them. Sharing ideas also allows others to support you. Setting a lofty goal? You’re not embarrassing yourself if you share, you’re creating an environment in which you’re encouraged and motivated to make progress. It’s tougher to go it alone.

Share Your Fears

Raw vulnerability. This is about building relationships. This is about teaching yourself that it’s okay to talk. Personal secrets rarely have a positive impact on the individual holding them, so find someone to talk to, even if it’s just one person. Whether an existential fear or something you’re worried about at work, express it and see how it feels. It’s an enormous tool for strengthening relationships and building trust, and it will often help you gain perspective on the things that trouble you. There are countless opportunities within this strategy that connect to mental health, which, while not discussed here, are even more reason to open up and talk.

Share Your Excitement

We’re better at this one, and there’s still room for improvement. Talk about the things you’re looking forward to. It’s energizing to speak with someone who is passionate and excited and optimistic. Sharing excitement is a great way to lead by example and to help others find the good in their lives. One of my favourite questions is “what’s exciting with you”, because talking about the good generates a positive conversation and allows relationships to strengthen.

Share Your Assets

Let’s talk childhood again. Let people use what you have. Buy a round, lend a friend your car, donate your time. Sharing your assets is another trust builder. It communicates that you’ve made a conscious decision to take care of someone else and improve their day. It’s one of the simplest ways to show you care, and it can be done again and again and again (hopefully someone else buys a round though). You’ll be celebrated and improve relationships if you follow one simple rule every day: Be generous.

Share A Laugh

Just talk. Get it out there. You don’t have to be the loudest or the most confident. Find new ways to connect and treat people like they want to be treated. Find commonalities and dive deeper to enrich conversations. A laugh can do wonders for a relationship and for a mood. It’s not about you, it’s about others, which in turn helps you as well. There isn’t a finite amount of happiness or laughter out there, you get to create more. Whether with a friend or with a stranger, exchanging a smile or a laugh will improve everyone’s day.

We’re in a paradoxical society in which we’re more connected than ever and more alone than ever. Try these things face-to-face. Know that others feel the same way you do, and you will know that if you talk to them about it. Even better, they will know that if you’re willing to share your thoughts with them. It’s not a matter of spilling out the entire contents of your brain, it’s a matter of risking vulnerability. Acclimatize yourself to a world in which sharing is okay, and you’ll learn that it helps far more than it hurts. You’ll be happier and you’ll make others happier if you show that it’s okay, regardless of what it is. Vulnerability is leadership, and it starts with whoever is willing to take a risk and share how they feel.

-Chris

Chris Ackroyd

Hey, I’m Chris. I created Life In Questions in hopes of helping people to think a little bit differently. I’m all about people, learning, sports, and the game of life. I believe that our minds shape how we live, act, and behave, and that by being more aware of ourselves, we can live happier and more successful lives.