Trust is in the Little things!

Lost trust, they say, is like a crumpled-up piece of paper. You can flatten it out and do your best to smooth it, but it’s pretty much impossible to put it back like it was. Most of us consider ourselves to be trustworthy; we don’t steal or tell any big lies, and that’s a good thing. But trust, especially in relationships – whether professional or personal – is built and broken by the little things we never think about.

Last week, when the NBA’s Cleveland Cavaliers and the Indiana Pacers were tied at 95 points each with only a few seconds left on the clock, both teams were plenty worried. But, the Cavs had a plan – get the ball to LeBron James. Their plan turned out to be a good one. LeBron sank a three-pointer as time expired, and the Cavs won 98-95.

So, with a roster full of world-class athletes, why did his coaches and teammates trust LeBron to win the game? It wasn’t because he’s the best player in basketball today, which he is. It wasn’t because he was the most talented player on the court. It wasn’t because he was the coaches’ favorite. It was because he does whatever it takes to win, no matter how small it might be, every single time he takes the court – no exceptions.

It’s so easy to brush off the little things people depend on us to do every day. Forgetting to drop off the mail for a spouse, missing a child’s soccer game, not returning a phone call, email, or text, or failing to finish a project at work don’t seem like a big deal. And, really, they aren’t, once or twice. We all blow it now and then.

What most of us don’t see, though, is every one of those little things chips away at the trust and respect that make a relationship work. Eventually, all of those “insignificant” missteps create doubt in the people whose faith in us we most need and want. Once that trust is lost, getting it back is like trying to smooth that crumpled piece of paper.

It can be painful to look in the mirror and ask, “Am I the person people around me know will get things done?” But, that’s exactly what we all need to do on a regular basis. If the answer is no, it’s important to figure out why and make some changes. Just understand that rebuilding lost trust always takes time and a lot of effort. It’s always easier to just keep it intact.

The best way to do that is to follow through with whatever we agree to do. How mad are you when somebody doesn’t do what they said they would, especially if it was something important? Most of us get irritated pretty quickly, and that’s exactly how others react when we consistently drop the ball. If completing a promised task doesn’t seem all that important, ask yourself how you would react if the person you failed did the same thing to you.

Take care of the small things. Be consistent. Be the person everyone around you knows they can count on. You’ll make the world a better place.

Heath Oakes is a Senior Territory Sales Manager for Colonial Life and Accident Insurance Company and the author of Ignorance on Fire: A Journey of Failing Your Way to Success. In addition to Second Shot, he can be found on Twitter @heathoakes, Instagram @ignoranceonfire, and Facebook @Ignorance on Fire.