to TRUMP or not to TRUMP

To Trump or NOT to Trump

By Suzanne Carter, LPC

?I wrote this in 2016 and now even more relevant

This morning as a relative spoke to me?in that "negative tone" with me that he often does, I had a very familiar but uneasy feeling. As I got off the phone, with this person, I realized that I had a strange sense that Donald Trump talks to people in this same tone.

This negative tone makes one feel? as if they are being talked "down to", as if they are less than or too stupid to really understand what the other is saying.? And, if the one being talked "down to" is not conscious, they can respond from a place as if they are stupid or unable to understand.

Of course, this all speaks to the tendency for humans to act as if they are better than or less than. When one feels bad about themselves, they often will go into grandiosity because grandiosity and arrogance are great antidotes to feeling bad about oneself. The unconscious driver of?this tendency is to make someone less than so you feel better than. The other stance that humans go into is to down grade themselves, especially around a person who loves to go in to grandiosity. The down grading is about taking oneself into shame or the belief that one is flawed.

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I am a recovering "one down person".? For the first 28 years of my life, I walked around and interacted with others as if there was something really wrong with me. I hid this belief by over-functioning, over-doing, over-giving, over -scheduling, and so on and so forth. I people my life with others who loved being in the grandiose position. Though I put myself through 8 years of college all on my own by waitressing (what we used to call being a server) or working in residential treatment centers, I knew I had to do this in order to prove that there was nothing wrong with me

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Long story short, I am in recovery from this behavior and I am happy to say that I understand in a profound way that we are all "equal to".? No matter what someone does, what their history is, what their race or gender is, this person is equal to every other human.

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I have learned that when we are communicating, we must speak from this?truth, that no?one is better than or less than another.

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I am known as the "relationship and?communication expert" because I have am able to bring together small or large groups?and empower them with these truths and then learn to communicate from this equality.

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Based on my perception, Donald Trump likes to seem "better than" or live from the grandiose position. A person who singles out large groups of? people and looks down on them or who calls others derogatory names is NOT coming from a place of "equal to", but of arrogance, grandiosity and one-up-manship-.? In contrast, I think there has never been a better example of coming from "equal to", than when President Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama?recently welcomed the Trumps into the White House.? It appears by the?snippets of conversation that we were privy to that the Obamas were respectful, open and cordial. The only way that the Obamas could be this respectful is to understand?their own worth.?When?a person understands their own worth, it is only then that they can truly

live from the truth that we are all equal to.? I believe that Trump must have deep wounds that makes him feel less than. This is the reason he has chosen to call people names, to speak in disgusting and vulgar terms about minorities and women and to think he has the right to tear apart important parts of our society that are hallmarks of a free society.

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My hope is that I will?in fact be able to bring together groups of people who have been torn? apart by the election and help them first identify and connect with their own worth. I have them do this by discovering their authentic or real or true self.? I then help them heal whatever caused them to believe they were better than or less than. Then I help them communicate with one another, using advanced communication techniques. This kind of communication from a place of equality and respect actually helps problems get solved in a way that can at times seem miraculous.

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So, in closing,?? the answer to trump or not to trump is this: IF YOU BELIEVE IN YOUR INHERENT WORTH, THERE IS ONLY ONE WAY TO BE?IN THE WORLD.? This way of being involves respect, love, boundary setting and clear communication.? I only hope that because of the way the Obamas treated the Trumps that somehow, this act of love from the Obamas will empower the Trumps to go and do likewise. We can only hope that this will come to pass for the Trumps,?however, and this is the most important part of this article:??? THERE IS NOTHING STANDING IN YOUR WAY OF FINDING YOUR OWN WORTH AND DIGNITY AND TAKING YOUR?AUTHENTIC SELF INTO THE WORLD.? If you choose to do this, not only will you not be trumping, you will? be healing the world and my friend, Make no mistake: YOU WILL BE DOING THIS BY BEING YOURSELF.

And in doing this, miracles will occur because you will resonate with like minded people, and solutions to problems that seemed?unsolvable?will appear.?? I GUARANTEE THIS.

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