True Guanxi (Mandarin for personal relationships/connections)

Captured by Grace – true Guanxi

I have been asking myself – What type of leader is desperately needed today? (Not only in the business world, but in our families, schools, governments…) Change and conflict is rampant everywhere.   What type of leaders and relationships teach and empower people to effectively deal with change, risk, conflict, and to reach their potential as human beings?

 Alexander Solzhenitsyn, speaking to the 1978 graduate class of Harvard College said… “A society based on the letter of the law and never reaching any higher, fails to take advantage of the full range of human possibilities. The letter of the law is too cold and formal to have a beneficial influence on society. Whenever the tissue of life is woven of legalistic relationships, this creates an atmosphere of spiritual mediocrity that paralyzes man's noblest impulses.”

Leaders work with projects, but they lead people! How are leaders to weave relationships and equip people in this world? A 'legalistic relationship' as Solzhenitsyn explains, could be described as a 'contract relationship'. These relationships are actually quite helpful when it comes to defining issues like salaries, timetables, benefits, etc. In effect, contracts create structure. But contracts do little in the way of relating to people and empowering them to reach their potential. They are also very limited in their ability to deal with conflict and change.

What type of relationships then deal with ideas, values, goals, or shared commitment? In his book 'Leadership is an Art', Max Depree identifies these relationships as 'covenant relationships'.

Covenant relationships induce freedom, and not paralysis. They are open to influence and fill deep needs, enabling work to have significance and fulfillment. He describes them as reflecting ..."harmony, grace, self-assurance, and expressing the sacred nature of relationships. They enable corporations to be hospitable to the unusual person and idea. They also tolerate risk, and forgive error."

In contrast to contractual relationships, covenant relationships are rooted in intimacy and relational stewardship! Covenant relationships establish a safe place of personal belonging rooted in the servant-hood nature of true 'guanxi' that honors the other person!

One of the activities I have often used corporate trainer is called the TP Shuffle. It’s a simple activity where participants line up on a 30 cm high log and must rearrange the order they are standing in without falling off the log.

We often use this activity at the onset of each program, as its main purpose is to facilitate the development of covenant relationships, setting the tone for the rest of the program. It’s not always easy though, as the log is only 10cm wide (and round) on top. As people start falling off, or are pushed off,  communication and contract type relationships are stressed, revealing the true nature of the team.

Soon people discover the need to be observant, identify the needs of others on the team, and also be confident enough to ask for help. Without this, the activity is virtually impossible to complete. As risks are taken and mistakes made throughout, grace often begins to shine. New ideas are tested, and before they know it, the team has completed a rather difficult and relationally intimate activity.

The corporate world has had its fair share of tragic failures of leaders over the years and equally tragic reactions to those failures. We must, however, get this one right. It is possible to promote covenant relationships and accountability in the marketplace in the spirit of grace...and still be excellent and profitable!

As we walk through life, we desperately need leaders who have personally been captured by grace, capable of both building and preserving covenant relationships!