Trick Your Brain into Evolving with a Trigger Word

The following is adapted from Average Sucks.

If you’re like most people, then there is something in your life that you would like to change—eating healthier, advancing in your career, managing your emotions better, or whatever it may be. 

And like most people, you’ve probably run into an invisible wall time and time again whenever you try to make that change. Maybe you succeed for a while, and then you fall back into old habits.

Change is hard. At times, it can even seem impossible. But I have good news: whatever change you want to make, you can do it. You just need a little help.

One of the reasons change is so hard is because our brains are wired to stick to the familiar. They like the safe and comfortable, and they avoid anything painful and scary.

So if you want to make a change, you need to trick your brain into evolving, and one of the best ways to do that is to find a trigger word.

What Is a Trigger Word?

A trigger word, in this context, is a word or phrase that triggers you to make a desired behavior. It works by reminding you of the worst-case scenario if you don’t change—the absolute worst thing that can and will happen if you don’t take action.

Remember: our brains love to avoid pain. It’s part of our survival programming to keep us safe. Our brains are incredible, powerful organs, but sometimes, they’re short-sighted. They tell us to avoid pain in the moment, even if that pain will lead to great rewards in the future. 

Have you ever struggled with working out? Logically, you know that exercising will lead to better overall physical health. But in the moment, your brain doesn’t care about the long-term gains of increased muscle mass or greater cardiovascular health; all it cares about is making the current discomfort go away.

Since pain is such a powerful motivator for your brain, use pain in your favor. Your trigger word will remind you of the big, long-term pain you will feel if you don’t make a change. That pain will outweigh the temporary pain of the moment, making it easier for you to go to the gym, or whatever your desired behavior may be.

Your trigger word must be a highly impactful word that moves you. It’s got to make you mad and feel like a gut punch. If it doesn’t move you, if you don’t feel it viscerally, it won’t work.

How to Choose a Trigger Word

To choose your trigger word, you must dig deep. You may need to go through several layers of pain to get to the one that will really drive you to make a change.

For example, one of my first clients ever was a guy named Jeremy. Jeremy wanted to lose a significant amount of weight, so I asked him, “What’s the worst-case scenario if you never lose weight?”

“Well,” he replied, “I could have a heart attack.”

“OK,” I said, “what if you have a heart attack, have a bypass, and still don’t change?”

“I could die,” he said very quietly.

“Well, we’re all dying. Everyone’s dying from a terminal illness called birth. That’s not unique to you; we all live with that. What else?”

He stared at me blankly. I knew he was wondering what could be worse than death. So I drew him a picture of how I, objectively, saw his worst case. I knew that his wife did yoga all the time and was super healthy. So I asked him, “What if one day you walk in the door and your wife sits you down for a big talk and explains that all these years of you not taking care of yourself have taken their toll, and she’s tired of it, no longer attracted to you, and doesn’t even know if she loves you anymore?”

He was shell-shocked.

I really wanted to drive home the point, so then I brought up something else I knew was very important to him: his three children. “You tell your kids to eat their vegetables at dinner, right?”

“Sure, I do,” he says.

Well, you and I both know that Jeremy can tell his kids to be healthy all day, but if he eats whatever he wants and never exercises, they’re watching. To make certain he got the point, I reminded him of the lesson he’s teaching his kids and the outcome he’s bound to experience.

“Your kids will either grow up just like you—they’ll have bad habits, be fat, teased, insecure, and die young—or they will be healthy and resent you and be embarrassed of you. And if you do die young,” I told him, “you’ll miss their games, their graduations, and their weddings.”

It was harsh but true, and it was what he needed to hear at that moment. He got the message, and right then and there set his trigger word as “bad dad.” 

Now, years down the line, I’m happy to report that Jeremy’s trigger word worked, and today he is healthy and happy.

What’s Your Trigger Word?

So what will your trigger word be? What is the absolute worst-case scenario if you don’t change? What word or phrase summarizes that worst-case scenario and reminds you of what will happen if you don’t do what you need to do and become who you want to be?

Take some time and really think about it. Once you decide, put your trigger word someplace where you will see it every day. And whenever you find yourself slipping back into old habits, think about your trigger word and remember why this change is so important to you. It’ll trigger you and get you moving into gear faster than a speeding bullet. 

With the right trigger word, you can trick your brain into evolving and finally make a change that sticks.

For more advice on how to make change, you can find Average Sucks on Amazon.

When Michael Bernoff got called out for not living up to his potential, it bothered him. But rather than shrinking from the challenge, he chose to step up and solve a problem he saw in the personal development industry. This quest led him to develop Human Interaction Technology, which moves society forward through the power of communication. From there, Michael founded the Human Communications Institute, which is dedicated to creating rapid and lasting change in people’s lives. He works with entrepreneurs, athletes, executives, and Fortune 500 companies, offering courses, live events, and leadership training for those who want to achieve a life beyond limits.