Triangulation congratulations

A Learn

I've made a lavish purchase: I've subscribed to the OS map app...? #crazyindulgent.

For years I've resisted. Why splash out ￡35 fine Engish pounds on the app when I might have a paper map of the area from when we last visited in 1997? OK, so they've built the bypass and the housing estate and the sewage works since then, but I'm sure it's pretty much the same. And anyway, who doesn't love the thrill of having to unfurl a massive bit of paper when you are half way up a windy hill? It adds a cetain depth and texture to family rows when someone can harrumph,

'You've got it upside down again'

or:

'Why didn't you get the waterproof version?!'

...as a sudden bout of heavy hail makes a hole in a crucial section of the paper.

Anyhooo...

The app is a revelation. I can plan routes, save and share routes, find out my (accurate) current location. I would say I'd miss the family rows, but luckily I've also downloaded a wildflower-identification-app so I can bore everyone pantless about whether that purple thing in the hedgerow is a violet or a viola and I can lose my rag when the kids say, 'But what you haven't spotted mum is that no one cares!'

I can't do anything simple - like download an app- without milking it for wider life lessons. So what are my wider, coaching-y learns?

How often do we THINK we know where we are, versus where we REALLY are? I was absolutely certain we were in 'The Great Field' in Braunton, but the purple arrow of OS truth gently hovered 500m to the West. The barn we could see yonder that I was 'certain' was the medieval gem described on the tourist information board was in fact... Farmer Dave's tractor shed built ten years ago...

Often Exec Coaching focuses on helping clients reflect on where they REALLY are and what is REALLY going on when they are chewing over a challenge,- as opposed to what the voice in their head is telling them. Questions I find really useful to 'geolocate' include:

"Where/when/with whom does this happen?" This can help to clarify if a something is a global challenge or is merely the consequence of the current context (a bit like knowing you are on a bit of the map with contour lines which are close together - yes we're on a steep hill, but it is about to top out).

"What are other people's views on the situation?" which can help to winnow out facts from differing opinions. Just like when your husband is SURE they are on the right bike path, but you are further up the hill and can SEE the correct path 20 metres away.

"What's missing from the situation?" which can help to identify the support team, the resources that would make it easier to navigate the challenge (like the first time I discovered compeed for blisters. (Deep joy).

Because knowing where we REALLY are, versus where we THINK we are means we are better able to grapple with life's challenges - rather than waste time and energy on fictitious obstacles.

...and when in Braunton, Devon, England, you are more likely to arrive at the 'Spud Shack' before it closes (purveyors of potatoes and milkshakes. Yes, genuinely, that is an actual thing - see pictures below)

which is something that EVERYONE cares about...

A Laugh

Wonderfully terrible jokes about maps, courtesy of upjoke.com

I met the guy who invented the part of the map that explains all the symbols. What a legend.

I put a world map on the kitchen wall, gave my husband a dart and said wherever it lands is where we should go on holiday. So I guess we are spending three weeks behind the fridge.

A man using Apple Maps walks into a bar...Or maybe a pharmacy, or a shoe shop.

I had a profound experience travelling round South Korea without a map... I did a lot of Seoul-searching.

I got an email offering me a free training course on spelling 'maps' backwards, but I realised it was spam.

A Leg Up

Cuppa with Beveridge

Every month I run a free group coaching session on Zoom. It is only available to folks who subscribe to my 'Laugh Learn, Leg U'p emails. Folks come along and share three things:

1) wins/ progress this month. By acknowleding progress we build valuable momentum.

2) challenges/ curveballs. Reflecting on these helps us learn for the future.

3) intentions and actions for the month ahead.

The session is warm, friendly, informal. Sign up to my weekly (ish!) 'Laugh, Learn, Leg Up' emails to get access.

Book recommendation: 'Mistakes were made, but not by me' By Carol Tavris and Elliot Aronson.

Not gonna lie, this is quite a dense read, so you might prefer watching Carol e.g on YouTube click here, but the message is profound and humbling. In a nutshell: humans seem to be wired to:

• judge ourselves by our intentions, but others by their actions
• loathe any inconsistencies between our beliefs and our actions (this is 'cognitive dissonance')
• do pretty much anything to reduce the unpleasant feeling of cognitive dissonance - which usually means self-justification.

The book is packed with sobering examples: from miscarriages of justice, medical malpractice to good old everyday family rows. My takeaway? You can be a good person and do a bad thing, however tempting it is to try and justify the bad thing as a good thing!!

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