Treat Yo' Self.

Raise your hand if you’ve ever been hard on yourself. ??????. Yep, that’s pretty much all of us. Especially as educators, caregivers, and humans with big hearts, we tend to hold ourselves to sky-high standards while offering endless grace to others.

But here’s the deal: you can’t pour from an empty cup. (Or, if you're me, an aggressively large coffee mug.)

This month, we’re leaning into self-compassion—not as a fluffy “self-care” platitude, but as a real and research-backed way to reduce burnout, improve resilience, and be kinder to ourselves. Dr. Kristin Neff, a pioneer in self-compassion research, defines it as treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding you’d offer a friend.

And let’s be real—if your bestie educator made a mistake, like forgetting to reply to an important email from a parent, you wouldn’t say, “What is wrong with you? How could you be so forgetful? You really need to manage your time better!” So why do we say that to ourselves?

This month’s microhabit will help you flip the script and Treat Yo' Self to a strategy that you can use every day to beat burnout. Ready? Let’s do this.

Microhabit of the Month

One of the simplest yet most powerful ways to practice self-compassion is to shift how we talk to ourselves in difficult moments. When you catch yourself in a spiral of self-criticism, pause and ask: If my best friend were in this exact situation, what would I say to them? Instead of harsh self-judgment, offer yourself the same kindness and reassurance you would give to someone you care about.

Research shows that self-compassion reduces stress, increases motivation, and builds emotional resilience. People! If there were a pill that gave us all this, I'm pretty sure we'd all asking our doctor for a prescription, even if health insurance didn't cover it.

But turns out that self-compassion is FREE99 and there's no prescription required!

A small shift in self-talk can create lasting changes in how we handle setbacks and challenges. By treating yourself with the same understanding and encouragement you naturally extend to others, you begin to rewire your inner dialogue from self-judgment to self-support.

To put this into practice, the next time you make a mistake, feel overwhelmed, or fall short of your expectations, take a deep breath and respond to yourself as you would to a friend. Remind yourself that effort matters more than perfection, and that being human means making mistakes. Then, ask yourself what advice you'd give a friend--and do that yourself. The more you integrate self-compassion into your daily thoughts, the more energy and resilience you’ll have to show up fully for yourself and those around you.

Here's more fun perks of practicing self-compassion:

• It's a win-win! You benefit, and your students do too as they see you modeling the skill.
• Self-compassion can be done on the job, when the stress is happening, in real time.
• Research shows that people who are self-compassionate on the job make more time for self-care off the job.

Grab your freebie coloring page about self-compassion (just in time for a Valentine's Day activity!). Click here to download.

You + Me in 3D!?

In January, I had the pleasure of presenting for school psychs and social workers in NYC about time management and AI hacks; special education administrators about using AI as an accommodation tool for students with disabilities, teachers in Oakland about how to support Autistic students in the classroom; and superintendents in Monterey, California about teacher retention.

In February, here's a few ways we can connect and geek out on burnout prevention and helping neurodiverse students and students with mental health challenges together!

1) Book Signing Event - Walnut Creek, CA

In our Thriving Educator and Thriving School Psychologist communities, we love geeking out on microhabits--those too small to fail behaviors we can do in the school day to reboot joy and reduce stress.

This is the topic of my latest book, Small Habits Create Big Changes and I'm jazzed to be hosting a local book signing event for any Bay Area educators and friends of educators!

If you can't make the book signing in 3D, may I suggest our FREE no book required book club? To give back to the dedicated educators, administrators, and mental health providers holding it down for our students every day in our schools and districts, we've opened up a microhabits workshop series based on the book for ANY educator...for FREE!

Sign up here for the series, which includes a free Thrive in 2025 calendar to download!

2) National Association of School Psychologists Conference - Seattle, WA

I’m really excited about this year’s conference—there’s nothing quite like geeking out with fellow school psychologists over the latest innovations! And guess what? Our organization Thriving Students Collective will be at Booth 1201, and we have something special to share!

We’re debuting LilyAssist, our AI-assisted report writer that’s revolutionizing the way school psychologists work! Come by our booth to say hi and get a demo to learn how Lily can help you break the "Test-IEP-Repeat" burnout cycle!?

Nerdy sidebar--we're proud LilyAssist has been listed in the Ed Tech Insiders cool kids club of AI tools for supporting neurodivergent students! So if you're not going to NASP but still want to see the awesomesauce tool for school psychs, click here to schedule a demo!

3) Learning & The Brain Conference - San Francisco, CA

I love being a part of the Learning & the Brain conference, and this year, the topic of Building Stronger Brains is near and dear to my heart. Teaching about positive psychology and microhabits is my JAM and I'm super excited to geek out with hundreds of educators at my talk! Join me on February 22nd!

4) AASA School Superintendents Conference - New Orleans, LA

Calling all Superintendents! Come check out Thriving Students Collective at the exhibition hall during AASA Convention from March 6-8th. We will have a special Treat Yo' Self swag at our booth, so be sure to pop by!

Cringe TikTok of the Month

Proof that kids are listening and watching us like hawks...Check out this TikTok to see how I got SERVED by my own offspring. (And if you can't get the TikTok app anymore because of the ban, here it is in Instagram).

See you in March for the next Thrive Archive digest...we're celebrating March Madness (Nope, not basketball--we're sharing pro-tips for thriving in the craziness of March!)

If you’re interested in being a part of the Thriving Students Collective community and would like more information about how to bring the Thriving Students Platform to your school or district, CLICK HERE to connect with us.

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Dr. Rebecca Branstetter is a school psychologist and founder of The Thriving Students Collective, which provides professional development, engaging online courses, and a supportive online community that prioritizes whole-school wellness and equips educators and parents with practical tools to empower every learner’s success. She also has a TikTok account all about burnout prevention in K12 that her middle school daughter has endorsed as “Cringe, but good dancing.”