Transforming Adversity into Professional Growth: Lessons from Recovery & Loss

What if your biggest failure could become your greatest success? Years ago, I hit what turned out to be my "rock bottom:" a year-long jail sentence for a 124-pound meth-addicted, convicted felon, and lost soul. I had nearly completely lost touch with my family or anyone who could even remotely be considered a real friend. I had no job, no future, and no hope. But that wasn’t the end of my story—it was the beginning of a transformation that would change my life forever.

Many of us find ourselves with our backs against the wall. It can often feel shameful, embarrassing, or hopeless. But I'm here to tell you that it is just as likely to be the most important and impactful experience of your life IF you can leverage it appropriately and not avoid its lessons.

My proof isn't just my thousands of clients' success but my own. Today, I’m a Ph.D. speaker, bestselling author, executive coach, and leadership consultant, helping executives, teams, and organizations unhook from limiting patterns and embrace radical growth. That's because the lessons I learned in my own recovery aren’t just for those overcoming personal struggles—they’re the same principles that help CEOs, executives, and teams unlock their potential.

If you’re ready to transform adversity into growth, this article (and my new book) is for you.

From Addiction to Transformation

Recovery wasn’t just about quitting drugs. Actually, it was barely about the drugs at all. It was actually about completely rethinking how I approached life, relationships, and success. I had to reframe many of my beliefs, learn resilience, develop self-awareness, and embrace the power of radical honesty.

Like my clients, I learned those lessons gradually and then turned them into success I couldn't have imagined before. When this journey started, I couldn't get hired as a pizza delivery boy, today, I have a Ph.D. in psychology, two bestselling books, and a career coaching executives, teams, and companies to overcome their own harmful habits and challenges.

Some of my proudest professional achievements have included:

1. Helping a renowned software developer overcome crippling anxiety and panic attacks that were interfering with his ability to work.
2. Assisting a private equity team struggling with culture, communication, and transparency in creating a 35% increase in team cohesiveness and distributed leadership.
3. Guiding a recently exited founder, find a renewed sense of purpose and joy after leaving behind his successful company (and finding his way to his next venture).

The connection between recovery and leadership might not seem obvious, but the principles that allow us all to thrive and feel purposeful are universal. Here’s how you can apply them to your own life and career.

1. Embrace Radical Candor

In discovering my path back to success, I had to get brutally honest with myself—and with others. Earlier in life, I thought it wise to share successes and wins, but that's it. Weaknesses, mistakes, uncertainty and confusion were hidden, never to be resolved but always to hold me back.

The same applies to many of my clients when we first meet. Afraid of looking weak, being passed over, seeming imperfect, or admitting they don't know something, many executives end up hiding in plain sight. But the truth is that leaders who avoid difficult conversations and discomfort for themselves breed resentment, mistrust, and inefficiency.

When I work with executives, we focus on creating a culture of radical transparency and candor. This means being transparent, honest, and compassionate with yourself an others—all simultaneously. It’s uncomfortable, but discomfort is where growth happens, which is why discomfort is where we go next.

2. Turn Discomfort into Your Superpower

Recovering from my addiction taught me that discomfort isn’t the enemy—it’s the guide. Whether it’s withdrawal or confronting painful truths, the only way out is through. My problem during the height of my struggle was that I tried to avoid discomfort at all costs. But avoiding discomfort created stagnancy and complacency. It stopped all development and left me small.

In the workplace, the same rule applies. One CEO I coached learned this lesson when they realized avoiding conflict was undermining their leadership. They became used to delegating conflict to their COO, which made others question their authority and created a culture of "passing the buck" in the C-Suite - a dangerous reality for any company. By facing their internal fears first and then becoming more capable of managing tough conversations head-on, they not only improved team performance but also gained the respect of their colleagues. This ended up creating more momentum for the entire team, and also helped the CEO feel more confident in his everyday life.

If you embrace discomfort and even welcome it as an opportunity to discover your next "best," you will find your professional growth accelerating.

3. Rewrite Your Narrative

For years, I believed I was a failure. That belief shaped my decisions and kept me stuck in destructive patterns. Recovery wasn’t just about quitting drugs; it was about unhooking from that story and creating a new one. But in order to rewrite the narrative I had to play a parallel game - explicitly remove the negative language and replace it with aspirational talk AND begin engaging in activity that felt beyond me (like graduate school early on). The former helped me eliminate the psychological blocks while the latter built up my confidence gradually until the old language didn't seem to fit me anymore.

The leaders and executives I work with often fall into the same trap - holding onto outdated beliefs about themselves or members of their teams. When it comes to themselves, these stories and beliefs are often deeply ingrained, often since early childhood.

Uncovering their source, coming to terms with them, and believing in your ability to transform them is a key tenet of my new book Unhooked. Transforming your narrative is about rewriting those beliefs through language AND behavior. It may also come as a surprise, but your beliefs about others not only limit their potential in your eyes (through the confirmation bias) but can also harm their belief in themselves (the Pygmalion effect).

What limiting story do you need to let go of? In what ways do your beliefs limit those around you?

4. Resilience > Perfection

Recovery isn’t linear, and neither is success. Mistakes will happen. The question is: what do you do next? Will you be reactive and let circumstances dictate your future or proactive, adjusting as needed to find the path to success?!

One of my clients—a senior executive—faced a significant setback during a company restructuring. Their division, once a top performer, fell into disarray amid shifting priorities and unclear communication from leadership. Team morale plummeted, deadlines were missed, and the executive became overwhelmed and questioned their abilities.

At first, they were tempted to double down on old habits—micromanaging, avoiding difficult conversations, and focusing solely on metrics rather than their people. But they realized that those strategies weren’t working. In fact, doing this was a form of escape - running back towards well-known habits that were comfortable but almost certain to lose.

With guidance, they started having honest, open conversations with their team, owning the mistakes that had been made and asking for input on how to rebuild trust. They focused on creating a culture of transparency and adaptability. The executive also began to model vulnerability, sharing their own challenges and inviting others to do the same.

The result? A more cohesive, motivated team that rallied together to turn things around. Today, that executive leads one of the most successful divisions in their company—not just in terms of profits but also in team satisfaction and retention.

Failure isn’t final. It’s an opportunity to adapt, grow, and come back stronger. True resilience comes from embracing mistakes as part of the process and using them as fuel for transformation.

My Mission: Helping Others Transform

Today, I use my experiences to inspire and guide others. I know how capable we all are to transform, often to an extent beyond our own wildest dreams. No matter how low or difficult your situation seems right now, let me promise you this - Your toughest battles can become your biggest breakthroughs.

The question is how you'll approach them - ownership, accountability, resilience, curiosity and candor could be the keys to using the current discomfort as rocket fuel.

A Challenge for You

Take a moment to reflect on your own journey:

• What challenges have shaped you?
• What adversity are you facing right now that could become the foundation for your growth?

The next step is simple: embrace the discomfort. Whether it’s a difficult conversation, a career risk, or an old belief you need to let go of, lean into the friction. That’s where transformation happens.

If you’re ready to unhook from what’s holding you back, follow me here on LinkedIn for insights on resilience, leadership, and personal growth. Let’s transform together.