Transactional to Trust

Culture is always a hot topic in business and leadership. Businesses are under a microscope after 2020 by the employees who work for them. The workforce in general is evaluating, "Is this where I want to work?" "Do I fit here?" "Is this the kind of culture I want to be a part of?"

When we are in trusted relationships, there's an openness with feedback and receptive ears to hear it. Even when it stings, the receiver at least listens, hears and evaluates if the feedback is worth taking action. When we're in transactional relationships, the desire to collaborate, grow together and listen drops dramatically. We know this from the marriages/divorce rates. We know this from our own personal journeys in the workforce. But when it comes time to cultivating a culture of trusted relationships, are we willing to put in the work?

One of my favorite podcasts, Coaching for Leaders, aired an episode "The Path Towards Trusting Relationships with Edgar Schein and Peter Schein." In this episode they explain the levels of relationships starting with level 1 (Transactional) to level 2 (Personal) to level 3 (Intimacy). Until this podcast, I never had the words to explain what I saw in the workplace but Edgar and Peter defined it all too perfectly: "The Concealed Self".

"In that culture, we learn how to talk to each other, what's appropriate and what's not. The concealed self is all the reactions I have about you in the conversation or in our relationship that I've been told only tell you if you ask. And even then, be gentle...as humans we all require a positive self presentation." - Edgar Schein

He goes on to say, "What we move from the concealed to the open is very much a function of what we collectively in level 2 (Personal) agree are the areas where we have to tell each other honestly what we think."

When I think about my professional journey, the high moments are those where we reached level 2, and even 3 (professional intimacy) status. It was a mutual agreement to live more authentically, in a trusted, open, respected and valued relationship. It is where we (two parties) agreed that with being vulnerable and receiving feedback, we are better people, culture-drivers, and leaders.

As leaders, we all have a part to play. It's not just one person's responsibility to lead culture. It's not just one person's responsibility to move relationships from transaction to trusted. You play a part. I play a part.