Training for Life (not a race)

I was supposed to be running a 10K race today, Sunday, April 26, 2020. It had been cancelled since mid-March when I just finished two weeks of training. The reason for cancellation was Covid-19. Should I continue or stop training? My other (not better) half reminded me that I was not training for the race but for fitness.

Somewhat ashamed of that temporarily derailed desire to run, I set out to continue the challenging 8-week training. I changed one of my hashtags from #trainingfor10K to #trainingforlife.

Running was not my thing, or anything longer than 100 meters was not my thing until about five years ago. In my youth through college, I was a sprinter, running 60 meters, 100 meter and even hurdles at sports events. I enjoyed competing. Actually, I still participate in an annual track and field competition organized by the metro DC Chinese community. Typically, I bright home some gold and silver medals.

My parents passed on some good athletic genes to me. My father ran sprints and hurdles without any formal training in his heyday during college in the 1950s. His hurdle record was unchallenged for 30 some years in his alma mater. He is still immensely proud of that. My mother was the first female gymnast in my home province Anhui in China. Her specialty was the balance beam. I got to witness her amazing balancing power one random day in my childhood. One summer evening, mother carried my baby brother on her back while we were out for a walk. She stepped on a banana peel. The next thing I saw was her going down on the ground with a perfect 10 split, still hanging on the baby on her back. That was 40 years ago.

Fast forwarding to 2020 and on this side of the Pacific. Five years ago, I ran my first 5K on Thanksgiving Day, Turkey Trot. That was exceedingly difficult for an out-of-shape sprinter, but it also started my long-distance running. I have since run 26 5K races on different continents and two 10K races.

Today’s 10K would have been my third. I had signed up for the race at the end of 2019 and was really looking forward to it. I ran the race in 2018, my first 10K and made it at 59’45”. The second 10K was during the Marine Corps Marathon just six months later.

I was not able to run the same race in 2019 due to an injured knee – yes, from running – each at different times. So, I wanted to do this again in 2020.

I trained almost religiously. I took photos of my training and used the number of days and weeks to mark my training. I shared them on social media sometimes to keep me going and maybe to motivate others.

The weather was still chilly in March and the quarantine order made it double challenging. I ran in early mornings before the sun rose. I ran in the evenings till it was dark sometimes because that was the only time I could squeeze in some running. There were days I was so exhausted that I did not want to even walk. My knees had to be iced often. My work was significantly impacted by the Coronavirus and my stress level was running high. Running seemed to provide a welcome escape for solitude, sanity and keeping me #FitHealthyandStrong in the meantime. My gym (along with all gyms in America) was closed so I could only run outdoors which was at the mercy of the weather.

Fortunately, each Sunday when my plan called for a long run the weather was pleasantly cooperating. The Anacostia River Trail, a beautiful trail that goes from Maryland to DC (and all the way to Mount Vernon in VA) was an ideal place and my haven. The best part of running on this trail besides spotting bald eagles, herons, turtles, snakes, bikers, rollerbladers, skateboarders, walkers, runners, boats, kayaks, fish, beavers, etc. is a track off the trail. I could not resist the temptation of getting sidetracked. Running a few loops on the track (8-lane loop = a little more than 2 miles) made me feel more alive and motivated. Often better pace on the track even it was at the end of my run when I was tired. I spotted more serious athletes training on and off the track. One day I saw a team training hurdles and the nostalgia brought down some tears, surprisingly.

Finally, the “race” day was almost here. I reached out to my running club to see if anyone would run the race with me. They talked me out of it – the traffic lights and narrow sidewalk would not be optimal. (The road would be closed during the actual race.) I would just use my trail for the race then. Since the forecast called for rain today, I decided at the last minute to run the race yesterday.

I finished the 6.2-mile race slower than my usual pace. Actually, significantly slower than two years ago when I was in the race the first time. Yes, I got to enjoy some wildlife, ran 8 loops on the track and said prayers for people in my life. Yet it was so unfulfilled, no excitement of crossing the finish line, no cheers, no post party, no pictures, no food, even the sun disappeared. Absolutely nothing. Just solitude and a thousand things on my mind. Not sure why it felt so anticlimactic. The temperature dropped as I walked back on the trail. I was trying to grapple with the reality: I had a plan and followed through despite many obstacles and difficulties; race day turned out so unsatisfied and unfulfilled leaving me still look for answers. It kind of mirrors what we are going through as a nation and as a race – searching for answers in this extraordinarily uncertain time and wanting to get back to normal.

One thing certain for me now is I no longer need a race to keep me motivated. I also realized that I have been given a gift to combat what is on my mind and ahead of me. I have a new training plan – training for life.

I’m determined more than ever to be #FitHealthyandStrong.

(Follow me on Twitter @Mandarin_Voice and Instagram @MandarinVoice.)

Dottie Li is a cross-cultural communication strategist, an avid fitness enthusiast and amateur fitness coach. https://trapac.net/dottie-li/