Tragic Loss: The Deadly Cost of Toxic Work Culture at EY India

A huge raft of emotions hit me when I heard the news last week that a 26 yr old EY employee in India, Anna Sebastian Perayil had died after 4 months in the job; her mother cited her death was due to illness caused by work related stress.

What on earth?

She died.

Dead.

DEAD.

From work???

It makes my stomach turn.

What makes it turn even more, is that the leaders in this organisation basically said "it wasn't us".

It's taken no time at all for many stories to surface online about the troubles in that particular workplace (and the troubles of modern work culture in India, generally). Many people left their jobs in the same team Anna was in because they were also suffering there.

And yet, not only is no responsibility being taken by the organisation, there's no investigation, no one attended Anna's funeral and there's no real promise of change. Nothing. Nothing!

She died, for heavens sake! What more could it possibly take to wake people up and to instigate change in leadership and culture? If the death of an employee is not enough, then we're in trouble.

I would render this team's organisational culture thoroughly toxic, the leadership is clearly abusive and perhaps even narcissistic to the point of disorder - they had no empathy or remorse. Anna was allegedly given work tasks in the middle of the night and demanded submission of them the very next morning. In that same environment, managers would cancel meetings so they could go to cricket matches.

This is abuse of power. Plain and simple. And she was a soft target.

And yet, what we hear from them is "it wasn't us".

This reminds me of "The Narcissist's Prayer" (Dayna Craig):

That didn't happen.

And if it did, it wasn't that bad.

And if it was, that's not a big deal.

And if it is, that's not my fault.

And if it was, I didn't mean it.

And if I did, you deserved it.

I could talk till I'm blue in the face about toxic, abusive, manipulative people. How justice needs to be served and change must happen so they don't keep hurting others. But oftentimes, these people don't tend to change. I say this because I know them. Not from my work but in my personal life. I have spent my whole life around these types. They never take responsibility for how they treat other people, let alone the devastating results of their behavior. In the workplace, if they do get caught out and have to leave one job they'll likely just move to another and spread their poison there.

And this is why it has to be on us to say "NO". That's a word that Anna clearly wasn't able to utter - even though her parents urged her to.

I can only speculate as to why she didn't resist her abuse, but I know it's not that simple or clear cut. If it was, she would have done it. Complex psychological and cultural factors are at play here.

Reading her mum's letter to EY (linked below), I sense that Anna was a high achiever and liked to please people - not uncommon characteristics for people who work in consulting, accounting and Big 4 organisations. And definitely not uncommon in Indian people. The need to be 'top of the class' is baked into us at a young age. The need to 'outwork everybody else' is hyped up too. We are valued by what we do, produce and achieve. And rarely will we dare to refuse and say 'no'.

It's these very attributes that often make us and the companies we work for, successful. But unfortunately it's also what lands us in hot water when we cross paths with power hungry, toxic managers and abusive culture. Here, we are prime prey and risk being eaten. Just like poor Anna.

For anyone who relates to any part of Anna's story, for anyone who feels something churning in their gut or sinking in their chest when they hear about her demise, you may have some alignment with her plight. And I hope you can remember these few things:

• Abuse is wrong, plain and simple.
• No job or person is worth destroying your wellbeing and happiness for.
• You can say no.
• You must say no.
• You deserve to rest and to be treated with respect.
• Your worth is not dictated by what you do and achieve, it's in who you are.
• You are not a robot or a resource, you are a human being.
• There are good places to work, seek them out and don't settle for less.

I know it's easy to say these things and much harder to do and embody them, but we must try.

We must speak our truth even if our voice shakes. We must know that to weed out toxicity and abuse anywhere in life, it's not the toxic, abusive people who are going to do it, or the people who enable them, protect them and are entangled in their web. It's us - who are awake and aware, alert and intuitive, who know that something's not right... when we see it or experience it, we have to act, we have to say no, we have to speak up, shout it out and if needs be, we have to leave.

We have to instigate change.

And thus I hope, that Anna's death will not be in vain.

You can read Anna's mother's letter to EY here: https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/technology/tech-news/26-year-old-employees-mother-writes-letter-to-ey-chairman-annas-death-should-serve-as-a-wake-up-call-for-ey/articleshow/113445667.cms

“It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.” ?J. Krishnamurti

#eyindia #ey #toxicworkplace #wellbeingatwork #wellbeing

I myself have a people pleasing, high achiever personality. I have worked myself to the bone throughout my life and career. I have the Indian 'outwork everyone' bug, and many insecurities and fear of authority that have driven me to put myself in very stressful work situations.

Thankfully I've never been in abusive work environments (God knows how I would have handled that, especially having grown up with abuse already). Also, I've really loved my jobs and my career. But, I have worked in high pressure consulting roles and pushed myself too far at times, causing myself to suffer. And thus, I now help other people avoid this for themselves.

My resilience and wellbeing talks and trainings educate and inspire people to take better care of themselves, to find deeper meaning and purpose in their lives so that they can be driven by something other than fear and insecurity. My aim is to help people flourish and thrive rather than just survive.

If you'd like me to come and talk to your team, give me a shout on [email protected] or send me a DM on LinkedIn. We can discuss pre-set training courses and bespoke content tailored especially for you. I look forward to hearing from you!

Pinky

www.pinkyjangra.com