Traditions are what you make them

“Mark, can you set up the card table, please?” Ugh.

As a teenager, this request was easy enough to fulfill, but as I unfolded the legs, gathered a mismatched set of chairs, draped the spill-proof tablecloth, and placed the plastic cups and plates around this rectangular nemesis, there was an unspoken angst in the air. Term limits weren’t formal in my familial administration, but I firmly believed I had served this table faithfully throughout the years, and now it was time to pass the baton to the next generation. I wouldn’t formally lobby my case, however, because tradition dictated that (like vampires) I needed to be invited inside the adult circle.

As we prepare to celebrate one of the strangest Thanksgivings in US history, the idea of tradition weighs heavily on my mind. More than any other holiday, Thanksgiving is filled with deeply personal traditions - who sits where, which dishes you use, how the gravy is made, using scratchy cloth napkins (because they match the tablecloth the family has used for generations), and the age-old battle between fresh cranberry sauce versus jellied. Thanksgiving is a time when families gather from around the country to overeat, give thanks, and interact argue.

This year, traditions have been disrupted. CDC guidelines can best be summarized as “stay home,” and families everywhere are struggling to reconcile past traditions with the current reality. Based on the number of comments made on social media and elsewhere, this reconciliation is an uneasy one. Tryptophan-induced snoring by your favorite drunken uncle just doesn’t translate well via Zoom. 

Although it doesn’t seem like it, traditions change all the time. Modern conveniences take over for old-fashioned ways (when is the last time you melted butter anywhere but in the microwave?). Changes in taste mean the hot dog Jell-O molds of old have given way to less disgusting side dishes. And the ultimate change comes when two people form a relationship; they bring together generations of traditions from their respective families, honoring the old while embracing the new. 

Your organizational family can be just as traditional, yet we have seen businesses make immediate changes to time-honored practices in response to the pandemic. In the process, they are discovering innovative ways to move forward, including new traditions that will guide them in the future. If an organization can do it, surely we as individuals can find a way.

I know that we are all mourning the loss of “normal,” and it’s important that we honor that loss. But as we gather for our non-traditional celebrations this week, let’s be sure we celebrate the new traditions we’ve made. Given all we’ve been through in 2020, I’d happily set up the card table one more time. Happy Thanksgiving everyone. 

With warm regards, and with thanks,

—Mark

Founder/managing principal/pro-fresh cranberry eater, IA

This is a reprint from our November 2020 Voice of HR newsletter. Subscribe here to receive monthly updates with our latest thinking.