Toxicity Dialed In and Out

Have you ever eaten something that didn’t agree with you? There is that awful feeling in your stomach that this isn’t going to go very well the rest of the day or night.

It is much easier to spot toxins in food or beverages based on the list of ingredients. We avoid those foods, or should, if we want to keep our bodies healthy, right??

So why then do we put up with toxicity in the workplace?

Simply put, it is not so easy to spot the poison.

This article is written on behalf of the hundreds of conversations I have had in my career in coaching or consulting where an individual did not know their workplace was toxic, or the change was so subtle, that it led to a lack of confidence, produced a lack of clarity, and stalled their progression towards professional fulfillment.

Let’s learn to discern the signs of a toxic workplace.

First, this is not an exhaustive list, but it encompasses the top five signs of toxicity I witnessed through coaching others or in my professional career.?

1.) Lack of accountability regarding people’s actions

When people do something wrong, such as failing to finish an assignment, lying, missing deadlines, or always having a bad attitude, but they remain employed after some or no correction, it tells anyone else abiding by the rules that it doesn’t matter if they are or not. Toxicity grows because apathy exists.

2.) Repeat offenders are allowed to stay

When those who are doing the wrong things are allowed to stay, whether it be for lack of available talent in the marketplace or nepotism or an avoidance attitude (all excuses by the way), it only tells the good employees that it doesn’t matter if they are good or not. Toxicity grows because blindness exists.

3.) Leadership with poor communication skills

When leadership struggles to communicate, whether it be raising one’s voice at a manager or back peddling on what was previously said or never sharing a vision of the future so people can follow, it only tells the rest of the organization that it’s ok to yell, to not be true to your word, and to blindly follow. Toxicity grows because leadership isn’t leading.

4.) Micromanagement

When managers get labeled as micromanagers, it is because they have severe control issues in their lives, an inability to communicate effectively, and a lack of trust in those who have been hired to do the job. The micromanagement style is incompatible with promoting creative thinkers, empowered employees, and future managers or leaders in an organization. Toxicity grows because managers are in a position they never should have been promoted to in the first place.

5.) Gossip culture

When the office culture has a hum of quiet and hushed conversations in corners, in the kitchen, or in sidebar virtual chats where one or two employees are sharing perceived “truths” about other individuals who are not in the discussion, it breeds an exclusivity culture that inhibits community, growth, and productivity. Gossip is usually an indicator that a person hasn’t grown up to a point that he or she can have an emotionally intelligent conversation with the person that is the result of their concern. Toxicity grows because poisonous speech is allowed.

Most of the time, a toxic workplace means an exit strategy needs to be implemented for you. But to help you determine how to make some best next steps, I’m re-sharing parts of an article I wrote years ago.?

The sad reality is sometimes the workplace gets so bad, you run as if the building (real or virtual) is on fire. But to leap from the frying pan into the fryer means to make a change without carefully considering the circumstances and to find yourself in a worse situation than you are now.

If you’re not paying enough attention ahead of time, you’re going to be consumed by the fire instead of putting it out. Let’s address the various stages before a necessary exit and see if any resonate for you.

First Stage = FIRE SPARK

What’s going on:?You sense some issues at work. You are seeing some dysfunction, but so far it appears that things might settle down.

What you need to do:?Depending on how long you’ve been with your company, you’ll need to assess if this is just a blip on the radar, or if this is an inherent culture issue.? If you’re a new employee, I suggest sitting back to observe and take note of the behavior of leadership; that will tell you quite a bit. If you’ve been with your company for more than two years, you have data to measure against. The challenge will only be if you didn’t take note soon enough and are now conditioned to the fire; if true, read on.

Second Stage = HEATING UP

What’s going on: Dysfunction has seemed to become a pattern at the workplace. Communication is broken. Leadership appears to be going in opposite directions of each other. Stress has greatly increased.

What you need to do: If you have a colleague or manager you can trust, I would suggest a private meeting to discuss some concerns you are seeing, but come up with suggested solutions to be part of solving the problem. If the management is part of the problem, then I would seek counsel from a trusted colleague. It’s important to note this isn’t about gossiping because that is highly unproductive. What this is ALL about is figuring out if the issues are solvable or if you might need to go. Provided you can trust the HR department, and the issues at the company aren’t involving that department, I would set an appointment to discuss as one of your last resorts.

Third Stage = ON FIRE

What’s going on: Chaos is the norm. Stress has led to health problems. You’re about to take the next job offer you get so you can get the heck out of there.

What you need to do: Stop. Take a breath. And then develop an action plan for conscientious decision-making because the time to have begun this was three steps ago when the fire sparked. If for whatever reason it was unrecognizable or ignored, you must be kind to yourself to take a thoughtful approach to your next move. I want to be clear that I’m not advocating to put up with behavior that could be categorized as bullying or mistreatment. That is the reason to leave effective immediately.?However, when you know it’s bad and you can take the time to get the next move right, that is absolutely what I’m saying is best to do.

A cautionary note: If you don’t stop to take inventory of what you need in your next role and what parameters must be in place at the next company, you’re going to set yourself up for a repeat. A career change can be good.? And it’s best when you’ve approached your decision carefully.

If you have read this, and find that you identify with someone who perpetuates toxicity, then please know the first step towards making a change in yourself is being honest with what you see in the mirror. I do highly recommend getting professional counseling because poor behavior in the workplace is usually more deeply rooted in things we may have gone through in our childhood or our past.

My hope is this article has freed up some people today to recognize a need for change, whether in the workplace, in oneself, or one’s career progression.

Michelle Adeeb is focused on providing insights into the real-world challenges we all face daily. Please follow her on this platform and subscribe to this monthly newsletter to receive wisdom, inspiration, impartation, and practical tips to see success come forth in your life.