The 'Tough' Negotiator

On most mornings, I like to take a walk up to Victoria Peak and cast my eyes over the amazing city that is Hong Kong. Its gorgeous forest-filled hillsides are the backdrop for the modern metropolis, and the diverse landscape is equally matched by the diverse population.

Looking out over the skyline I can see an abundance of construction, old and new buildings, each of these sites secured by the reliable (yet terrifying) bamboo scaffold where contractors daily scale these monstrous concrete mountains. And each time I see these acrophobic skyscrapers in construction, I can’t help but think about the contractors that sit at the top of the buildings peering down at us ant-sized humans running about our daily lives.

It also reminds me of a past life where I worked with mains contractors on a regular basis in London, and was invited to many a “topping out” party where the roof is finally completed on a new construction. I always recall before my first interaction (and since) with contractors that I was advised, “Oh, bear in mind that contractors are tough negotiators”. However, I’ve come to realise that it isn’t just contractors who are the “toughies”. In fact, I’m sure if I did a survey now on who was your toughest negotiation counterpart, we would see individuals of all shapes and sizes pop up.

But that’s the point, isn’t it? No matter the industry or level of experience, there’s a chance that we have all come up against a particularly tough negotiator. Someone that made you feel perhaps as small as you might look when that contractor was peering down from the top of the skyscraper.

So, what can we do when we come up against this?

Let me give you a three-step process to help you navigate these resolute individuals:

1)?????Humanize them. Too often I hear clients express fear about the company their counterpart is working for, the title they have, or just their age. You need to start researching the individual.

?Start with these simple questions:

?a.?????Who is it that you are negotiating with?

b.????What do you know about them?

c.?????What might they do in this negotiation?

d.????Do they have viable alternatives to working with you?

e.?????Has anyone dealt with them in the past?

Use every resource you have to find out as much as you can about them. It’ll help you in the long run.

2)?????Create a favourable balance of power. Even if you feel like you haven’t got the balance of power, act like you have. People’s perception of you is their reality. So, make their reality one that demonstrates you as the dominant side of the negotiation. This should be immediate; don’t wait for the negotiation to reach fruition to start acting like you’re in a position of power. You may want to start the negotiation in a manner that sets the tone. And I’ll leave you with a question. Is talking and dominating your counterpart a demonstration of power? Or, is it asking questions and waiting for your counterpart to reveal information?

?3)?????Get yourself a strategy. Depending on the complexity of the negotiation this will vary, but every client we have worked with needs support with their strategy. They may feel like they have one, but like the famous Mike Tyson quote, “Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth”. The struggle our clients have is that they get “punched in the mouth” and realise their strategy isn’t robust enough, or they don’t have a secondary strategy. Work with your teams (whoever will be involved) and align on your strategy for this negotiation. And lastly, stick to it! Don’t let the tough counterpart put you off!