Top 5 Tips for Public Speaking

It's been a while since I've written my own blog post. I used to be an avid blogger back in the day and wrote on a range of topics related to society, music, technology and the economy. Now, over 10 years later I write from a new perspective. This time what brings me back to writing is to share some insights, advice and tips for public speaking.

It's hard to sum up one's life's story. As a public speaking coach, when I ask clients "what's your story?", the answer is generally a blank face or a very nervous one. Three simple words yet so daunting to even begin to map out. How on Earth do we describe the theme, engine, and narrative of our entire lives' stories? Usually, people tend to respond by answering the question in a timeline fashion; this happened, then that, then that.

People tend to underestimate the power of writing as a tool to distill information and emerge with a story. Everything makes so much more sense when you put pen to paper and recognise patterns, themes, drivers, characters, and intentions. Writing your story is the first step to self-awareness on another level. It requires you to jump outside of your body and look at your life as if it's someone else's.

I recently did this exercise of writing my life's story on the airplane flying from Amsterdam to Milan. In coaching sessions, I go through a guided process of writing one's life's story as if it's a movie. Easier said than done. When I tried to put this into practice on the plane, I experienced it first hand. I wrote my life's story as it has played out over the past 11-odd years; all the important moments, what drove my decisions, my intentions, and shortfalls. So much made sense just from this simple writing exercise.

In speaking engagements like meetings or presentations, we rarely share our entire life's story. But it is crucial to become self-aware and have a solid understanding of your story. In our adult lives, we tend to become attached to the narrative of our companies or work. Ironically in high-stake speaking scenarios, it is oftentimes required of us to give of ourselves in a more personal way to foster human connection.

Communication has consistently been identified as the most in-demand soft skill in the job market. My on-the-ground market research confirms this. Recently, I had a (very short) coffee with an executive of a private equity firm in the Netherlands. I couldn't quite understand what his interests or needs were and so I quite bluntly asked, "what do you care about?". A bit taken aback by my abruptness, he went on to explain that he's looking to hire the right people that can eventually become partners at the firm. The biggest problem in finding the right people is the lack of communication skills. I mentioned that I had seen that too, especially with venture capitalists and consultants in the startup scene where I noticed that ego is a big roadblock. We both agreed that ego is the number one factor stopping many professionals from growing but that you cannot help someone who doesn't want to be helped.

Earlier this year, I was at a career fest interacting with MBA, Finance and Economics students. I asked many of the students what the most important skill for business is in 2023 based on their studies. Each and every one of them said "cross-cultural communication". The research is very clear on this too. According to a survey by RogenSi, 93% of professionals believe that poor communication is the main cause of misunderstandings in client relationships. A survey by Interact shows that 91% of employees believe that their leaders lack effective communication skills.

With years coaching in the language and public speaking space, I'd like to leave you with 5 tips to jumpstart the development of your public speaking skills whether that's in one-on-one engagements, groups or to large audiences:

Tip 1: Write Your Story like a Movie

Get out "notes" on your phone or use the old-school pen and paper to write your life's story as if it is a movie. Try to identify what the highlights or critical moments were, what motivated your decisions, what your intentions were and describe your character.

Tip 2: Do Breathing Exercises

Breathing exercises are a very cheap and effective way of regulating your nervous system, managing stress and laying a solid foundation for your voice. Breathe in deeply through your nose, let your stomach expand (not your chest) and breathe out through your mouth. Do that for 2 minutes and notice how calm you feel. Your breath controls your speech.

Tip 3: Map Out Intentions

Clarity starts with setting clear intentions. Before a meeting or presentation, map out what your intentions are. While mingling at conferences or social events might not be intentional speaking engagements, in the business context, setting intentions is crucial to staying focused and on track.

Tip 4: Use Time Wisely

Know when to slow down and when to speed up. Speaking at a fast pace proves nothing. Sometimes it's better to slow down and shows that you're in control of your speech. Embrace each word and speak thoughtfully. You're not a machine.

Tip 5: Listen Carefully

101 on how to get rid of ego: listen to what the other person is saying. Not what you want them to say or what you think they're saying - what they're actually saying. Track words and identify the main words. If you're really in tune with nuance, you'll be able to pick up on a lot by vocal tones, stress syllables, language choice, sequencing, framing and even omission (sometimes there's a lot more information in what's not being said that what is being said).

As you venture out into your meetings, presentations and speeches, try to apply these 5 tips and notice the change in the nature of your engagements. Even if you can remember one of these tips and apply them, I'm sure that it will enhance your communication skills. To be an effective speaker requires self-awareness, preparation and a bit of work on our characters.

- Rebecca Hope, Public Speaking Coach at The English Square

Learn more about speech development programs for you, your organization and your school www.theenglishsquare.com.