The Top 5 Things I Was Wrong About in 2022: Reflections and Lessons
Jake Geller
I build companies & teams that turn BIG, BOLD ideas into actionable plans resulting in profitable businesses. SaaS Enthusiast. Startup Addict.
Up top: I want to expand on the title of this post. It's not an ego thing, that I won't admit I was "wrong."
I just don't like skewing negative - that ain't me! But understanding where I was “wrong” makes me humble - and that ???? the me I strive for.
So, an alternate title: "What I changed My Mind About In 2022."?
These thoughts are more about what happened last year that made me ?????????? ??????????????????????...questions I had to revisit, things I asked myself for the very first time, or things I saw in a new light.
This is me checking myself.
Whether it was a 180 change, or an expanded, deeper understanding of something I thought I knew - I am spinning what I was "wrong" about into insights and lessons I'll share.
So here is what I was “wrong” about last year, and what it’s taught me:
? I Can Move Mountains: This is about me, and my relationship with time. I am but one human. Society pressures you to move fast.? I tended to pack too much on my plate, and I KNEW it. I freakin’ train people NOT to do this, and yet…I was guilty.
? I’m Hyper Self-Aware: This might be true relatively speaking - but I can’t overestimate how self aware I really am. Complacency is the death of productivity.? Every single person can be better at this.
? “Grow Fast Or Die”: Startups LOVE this saying…a saying that is, in fact, dead in itself. I had to realize that I can always improve my leadership approach and foresight. Spoiler: It’s a myth that hummingbirds die if they stop moving.
? Money Is Success:? I have been wrong more than once about what success looks like. It must evolve. My true vision didn’t appear until midway through the year.
? Work And Play Can’t Mix: There’s a reason that in The Shining, Steven King had Jack Nicholson say “all work and no play makes JAKE a dull boy.” ??There’s room for work and play to coexist, and it SHOULD - even amongst competitors.
Remember, updating our perceptions of reality is a continuous journey. It's called LEARNING. It won’t stop even if you want it to, so better to actively reflect and seek opportunities for learning, than passively. Join me as I check myself and share the things I was "wrong" about in 2022.
The Time Conundrum
Time is a tricky thing. It's greedy and doesn't reciprocate. Simply moving fast isn't enough to conserve time and there is never enough of it. As entrepreneurs, we often overestimate how much we can accomplish in a short amount of time and underestimate the power of efficiency and strategy.
I found myself packing in way too much, not running circles around deadlines and milestones like I thought I was. I was guilty of the very thing I train others not to do - and I did it knowingly.
But why? How did I let myself fall into this trap?
The truth is, being an entrepreneur is uncomfortable by nature. It's easy to fall into the trap of thinking that we can move mountains just by moving fast, but that's not the case.
Big things take time, and it's important to understand our workload, limitations, and constantly evaluate how we can be more efficient to hack those limitations. We must learn to think "as the crow flies" in order to make our speed count.
I realized that I needed to constantly check what I was spending my time on, re-evaluate if my time could go further on other elements, and learn to toggle between tasks nimbly. I also needed to step away, trim inefficiencies, and look for the actions I could take to make the biggest impact.
We take time for granted, but what we really should be doing is caring for it like a crying baby - knowing what its different cries mean and how to make it stop in the fastest way possible.
Speed is not the only predictor of accomplishing goals "on time." It's important to be efficient and strategic while maintaining that pace. As entrepreneurs, we must constantly assess and adapt our approach to time management to ensure success.
The Self Awareness Problem
Self awareness is a sneaky MF. Last year, I had the illusion of hyper-awareness - another thing I learned in 2022.
Our brains can actually make us unaware of how unaware we are!
It's a common problem for entrepreneurs and humans alike. Our brains are wired to filter and simplify information to make life more manageable, but in doing so, it can hide important signals and increase our biases.
There are many myths and misconceptions about self-awareness, so let’s break them down. First, let's understand that there are two types of self-awareness: internal and external. Internal self-awareness is about having clarity on our values and ambitions, emotions, behaviors, and thoughts. External self-awareness is about understanding how others see us.
Internal self-awareness is something that requires consistent practice. It's not something that you can just check off your list and be done with. It also requires a shift in how we think about our emotions. Instead of asking "why" we feel a certain way, try asking "what" is happening to make you feel that way and what's in common with other flares. This will give you a more accurate understanding of your emotions and motivations.
External self-awareness is also a practice that requires consistency. It's not something that can be done once and forgotten about. It also requires a shift in how we think about feedback. Instead of taking feedback as a personal attack or as a reflection of our success, we should focus on what it can teach us and how we can use it to improve.
So, to combat the tricky relationship with self-awareness, I learned that I need to:
Even enlightened monks keep meditating. So, us laymen can certainly check in with our one and only Selves more often.?
The “Grow Fast Or Die” Myth
Ever heard the old saying “hummingbirds die if they stop moving?” It’s a fun, but wrong, metaphor.
They can, in fact, perch. And a lot of developmental things happen during those important, though short, times. Times where they are vulnerable.
Earlier in this post, I said that I learned last year, moving fast on your own is not enough; you must recognize your own personal limitations and focus on efficiency and expectations.
But to take it further, extreme, fast growth in your overall business shouldn’t be the goal either. “Grow fast or die” is a dead saying.
As entrepreneurs, it's important to shift our focus from fast money to mastering leadership processes and finding peace in the discomfort of pushing against conventional wisdom.?
“Bigger” companies in the space will look down and pass judgment on “smaller” companies that don’t embrace the “grow fast or die” mentality. They’ll call smaller companies taking their time to grow, a “lifestyle brand.” Call them bad businesspeople.
?The "grow fast or die" mentality is toxic and leads to tunnel vision with $$ in our eyes, and projecting that vision on others without context. In reality, there's no one leadership strategy that is above the others, but money-focus is below the others.
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Last year, I learned the hard way that embracing this mentality can actually hurt your business. I missed my revenue goals because I thought I could grow faster than was actually possible. I was so focused on growth and speed, that I overlooked the importance of refining my standard operating procedures with my team.
So, let's break this down like a bank account. Every time you exercise - you're making deposits into your bank. And every time you eat, you're withdrawing from your bank. But you can flip the analogy too: a withdrawal could be viewed as an expenditure of energy: working out, and a deposit: eating.
The key takeaway is this: hone in on the strategy that works for you. Don't worry about what others are doing or what they think. As the saying goes, "f*** the haters." It's not about how fast you grow, it's about how far you go. And every startup has its own formula and its own goals. So, don't be afraid to take your time and perch for a bit. You might just be surprised at how much you can accomplish during those "vulnerable" moments.
The Money Mindset Dilemma
?This “wrong” of mine? is hard to admit.
Not because I am ashamed, but because I never really allowed myself to think I believed it in the first place. It’s the fourth thing I was “wrong” about in 2022 - emphasis on the quotation marks because it’s a prime example of something I “knew” but didn’t fully absorb.
?Money is often seen as the ultimate measure of success, but that couldn't be further from the truth. It took me until 6-8 months into 2022 to really embody this. Last September, a mere blink and a swallow ago.
So it goes without saying that, for a long time, money ?????? the motive, even if I actively denied it.
On paper, ?I convinced myself that I had a more nuanced definition of success, but when I am honest with myself, I was still tied to them. Just wasn’t ready to face it. I genuinely felt uncomfortable with accepting this, so I built a facade to be mildly more comfortable:
Success is money AND helping people.
And now I know it’s not about money at all.
It's easy to get caught up in the rat race of chasing money, but it's important to remember that it's just a means to an end. It's not about how much money you have, but how you use it and your mindset towards it.
I realized that true success is about how you impact others. I'm a liberator, someone who helps people break free from limiting beliefs, toxic establishments, and manipulative ideologies. I realized that this was bigger than me and it was what truly fulfilled me.
The journey is just as important as the destination and it was during a life-changing trip abroad that I realized this. I finally grasped what was truly important and fused my vision.
Money is a myth, something that humans made up. What's more powerful is what else we devise that takes it from abstract to real impact.
The “Grind” Problem
“?????? ???????? ???? ???????? ?????????? ???????? ?? ???????? ??????.”?- The Shining
Are you one of those people who believe that work and play can't mix? Well, I used to be too. But, let me tell you, I was wrong. Dead wrong.?
I used to think that any time spent outside of building my businesses was a waste. I convinced myself that my work WAS my play and that other people were just being lazy. But, unlike Jack (you know, Jack from Steven King’s "The Shining"), I was able to snap out of that charade without turning into a deranged cabin-fever-stricken psychopath (phew!).
Here's the thing: play is actually psychologically necessary for adults. It helps to stimulate new neural connections, expand creativity, increase flexibility, and regulate emotions. As an entrepreneur, my life revolves around my work and impact. But, I used to think that work and play were mutually exclusive and that play should be minimized. I would even set a timer for my allotted "beach time" on Saturdays before heading back to work. And, I would often decline social events in order to focus on my work.
But, as I've grown and evolved, I've learned that discipline is not so fragile that it can be shattered by having a little fun. In fact, play is a core food group when it comes to maintaining a healthy work-life balance. I learned that I can trust myself to be productive and make time for some ruckus.
A great personal example is Beer Fest in Wilmington, NC. For years, I worked while all my "hooligan" friends went and had a blast. I adopted a bit of an "outcast" mindset and even judged people who so freely played like that. But, on my Euro trip, I gained a new perspective on what a balanced work-life means.
I was still nervous to RSVP "YES" to Beer Fest, but I did it anyway. It was uncomfortable at first. I got separated from my friends and my anxiety was through the roof. I even started to think about all the things I could be doing to be productive. But then, I had a moment where I took stock of how I was feeling. I realized that my defense mechanisms and confirmation bias were coming in hot. So, I made a conscious choice to shake off that funk and wander.
I ran into people I didn’t realize remembered me, reminding me of advice I gave them that helped them. People that are thriving. People that are liberated! I played with different approaches. I listened to music and generally floated around with a newfound peace in the chaos. And, as I looked around at the 2000 people building relationships, smiling, dancing, and living in their moments, I realized that there was no reason to judge anyone (including myself) for any of that.
Here's the thing, my work ethic and passion have actually grown through this adjustment. I still make sacrifices, but I pepper in more time for play - unstructured, full of mystery (and a little fun anxiety). So, if you're still under the impression that work and play can't mix, it can’t hurt to watch The Shining and see what can come of that.
Turning My “Wrongs” Right
So, I’ve spilled the beans on the 5 things I got "wrong" in 2022. But, what good is airing your dirty laundry if you're not going to take it to the cleaners, right?
Let me take my lessons a step further and provide some actionable resources for you to "right" these "wrongs" in your own life.
Falsehood #1: I Can Move More Mountains At Record Speed:
Time is a tricky thing, but you can hack it by focusing on the gears, levers, and pulleys behind it, instead of just your speed. Tools like ClickUp and Toggl can help you gain transparency and organization, resulting in increased efficiency.
Falsehood #2: I'm Self-Aware Enough:
Self-awareness is not a fixed state, it's a constant process. There are tons of ways to improve it, you just have to actively seek them out. Insight Timer is a great app for free meditation to get you started (https://insighttimer.com/)
Falsehood #3: Grow Fast Or Die:
To debunk this outdated notion in startup culture, you need to have a clear picture of what's important and sustainable for you. Follows like Alex Hormozi https://www.dhirubhai.net/in/alexanderhormozi/,? and Adam Grant https://www.dhirubhai.net/in/adammgrant/? can provide valuable mindset advice.
Falsehood #4: Money = Success:
To truly understand what motivates you, at your core, you need to dig deep. Tests like this free motivation assessment https://www.16personalities.com/tools/preview/motivation ?or Predictive Index https://www.predictiveindex.com/assessments/assessments-validity/? can provide guidance, but they're just the beginning. Find and key into what motivates your soul!
Falsehood #5: Work and Play Can't Mix:
Play is essential for adults and is necessary to maintain a healthy work-life balance. The NY Times has a great take on play and some creative ways to incorporate it into your life: https://www.nytimes.com/2020/08/14/smarter-living/adults-play-work-life-balance.html . Unsure how to flex your social muscles? Follow your city’s Instagram page or newsletter for upcoming events.
Remember, these lessons are worth repeating, and that's how I learned them - by constantly revisiting them. If you have any great resources for inspiration or growth in these areas, please feel free to share them with me!