Top 19 Things I Learned In 2023

This is my 7th time publishing this article, where I distilled the year into my top 19 lessons.

In this issue I cover topics of parenting, relationships, fitness and business:

www.rntfitness.co.uk/top-19-things-I-learned-in-2023

For a sneak peak, I’ve shared the headlines below…

19 Lessons from 2023:

1. It’s a different feeling when it’s your child. I never had much interest in other people’s kids, so I feared I’d not feel much when the time arrived for me. I couldn’t have been more wrong!

2. Becoming a dad has helped me focus on what matters, made me less in a rush, and has helped me (progressively) reduce my workaholism. I was (and still am) terrified of being an absent dad, physically or mentally.

3. Ambition is a beautiful paradox. It creates the drive to make real change happen in your life. But if it goes unchecked, it can be the very same thing that destroys you. My lesson: get to the root of what I want (and why).

4. The desire to prove yourself can become a poisonous habit of the mind. If my living is my child’s learning, I feel an immense responsibility to break bad habits and vices.

5. A mother’s love is a magical thing to witness. She will do anything and everything for her children. I’ve felt it myself growing up, but it’s another thing to witness it as an adult.

6. What I value above all else is freedom. I’ve learnt this year the life you live now is a result of decisions you made 3-7 years ago. 2013-2017 I was working in a basement as a PT, so I became obsessed with the idea of working from anywhere, anytime, on my own terms.

7. Asking “What if this is the last time?” can quickly bring you into a state of gratitude and presence. I use this every time I think about rushing bathtime, or whizzing through the pre-bed massage. Especially with her milestones happening so fast.

8. Investing in space and convenience pays back in spades, especially when living long-stints abroad. I changed my mindset from seeing it as an expense to thinking of the potential ROI.

9. Close friends can become strangers, and that’s okay. If you’re growing and you’re in a different season to your peers, expect (and accept) gaps to emerge. After you see a friend, check in within yourself to see how you feel. If you’re drained, it’s a red flag.

10. You can’t intuitively eat until you break an “all or nothing” mindset. If you want to maintain a lean bodyweight, you have to stop planning (and labelling) blow outs or cheat days. When you’re near full, stop.

11. Veganism is a philosophy and way of living, not a diet. If we’re privileged enough to even discuss what we put in our mouth, it’s worth taking the extra step to consider where it came from (and how).

12. Maintaining a body takes ? of the work it took to build it. Cardio won’t kill it! If you invest 5-7 years into building your dream body, it’s scary how little you need to keep your gains.

13. The trick to “hybrid training” is nailing your recovery. The biggest risk is overtraining. 5 days a week, with only 2-3 days “hard” is my perfect sweet spot.

Side note: What I’ve learnt is that sometimes I like to run, sometimes I like to kick things, and sometimes I (still) like to get under some heavy ass weight!

14. Leaning into your deep-rooted fears makes you feel alive. I tried boxing when I was 15; I got beat up in a sparring session and never went back. This year’s Muay Thai fight, 15 years later, put those demons to bed. It’s never too late.

15. Sometimes you gotta use dopamine to sprint your way to long-term transformation. Our biggest competition is Netflix, McDonald’s, etc. If we can make fitness addictive, with the same dopamine hits (over a long enough time frame), we’ll see a fitter world.

16. Results will always be number one - never stop improving your product/service. The only catch? A transformation will always require honest hard work. It’s one of the few things in life you can’t cheat or buy. That’s why it’s such a special feeling when you get there.

17. My role in the business has evolved to asking “who?“, not “how?“. I’ve learnt this year the value of a business is inversely proportional to the involvement of the founder. Having a daughter means more (and improved) delegation is now a responsibility, not a luxury.

18. We need to be reminded of the same fundamental principles, instead of constant exposure to new information. Whether it’s in coaching, marketing, sales or team building, I’m playing Chief Reminding Officer more than ever.

19. Working on your relationship together is even more important when you’re parents. For us, it’s a “Weekly Couples Check In” ritual we’ve used for 4+ years now. As each year passes, I recognise the strength of my relationship is the springboard to anything I do in life.

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Which lesson resonated most with you?