Top 10 Networking Tips for Introverts

We know we need to network.? Many of us cringe at the idea of walking into a room full of strangers and making small talk, though.?

I get it.? I grew up painfully shy.? I used to hide behind my mom’s knees whenever adults would talk to me.? I’ve obviously gotten better at this, but it’s taken intention and a whole lot of practice.

Undoubtedly, you’re going to go to an event soon where you see the value in building new relationships.? Here’s how to make the process a benefit to both you and the people you’re meeting.

1.??????? Know Who’s Going to be There.? Don’t go to a networking event by hanging out with the same people.? If you know the guest list, you’ll get a sense of who you’d like to meet.? Review LinkedIn profiles, see shared interests, and have a plan of making a few new contacts at the event.

2.??????? Prepare a List of “Big Talk” Questions.? No one likes to small talk – we remember conversations where there was big talk - conversations about ideas, shared interests, and values. When I network, one of the very first questions I ask is “Tell me your story.”? That way, I learn a lot about the other person, which gives me more information to build questions off of.? I also have a list of other questions I can pull from – are you reading anything interesting?? What is your company doing to manage employee disengagement?? What are you looking forward to this year?? Don’t be shy about telling anyone why you were looking forward to meeting them, either – they’ll value it.? If you want to meet with an SVP, be direct: “Jim/Mary, I was really looking forward to meeting you.? I’ve admired how you’ve built your career.? I’d love to hear about some of the defining assignments you had and how they helped position you for advancement?”

3.??????? Choose Your Energy.? Decide the energy you want to have before you enter the room.? The right intention will help set the stage for meaningful engagement.? For me, I typically want to be curious, and have positive vibes so that people want to talk with me.? Part of this is choosing to smile.? A smile makes people want to talk with you.?

4.??????? Pretend Like This Is Your Party and You Own the Place.? As such, you’re the host and your job is to meet people and make them feel comfortable.? When I adopt this frame, it helps me take ownership of conversations and it pushes me into meeting new people and making sure they have what they need to be comfortable.?

5.??????? Have Your Introduction Down.? When you introduce yourself, share some intrigue.? Don’t just say who you are, what you do, where you work. Share your passion and what makes you distinct.? This is your chance to standout a bit – e.g. “I’m Angie Morgan.? I’m a Marine Corps Veterans turned CEO.? I help high-performing professionals because the best leaders they know.”

6.??????? Make Other People Feel Important.? People like to talk about themselves.? Ask great questions and be present for their responses.? Remember: the person who talks the most in a conversation has the best time.? Plus, if you don’t like the attention, you can put the spotlight on the other person.?

7.??????? When You Introduce Someone to Another, Make Them Feel Like a Rock Star.? If you need to connect two people, make the other person know that they’re meeting the most important person in the world … and vice versa.? It’s a small thing, but it’s an easy opportunity to make people feel special.

8.??????? Don’t be the Dud.? A dud is someone who can’t keep a conversation going – someone who answers “yes” and “no” to questions, which turns a conversation into a dead end. A dud is someone who doesn't take the time to learn about the other person, either. Think of a conversation as a volley – when a ball gets served to you, serve one back.? After you answer a question, ask a question so that the conversation feels balanced.

9.??????? Have an Escape Plan.? No one likes to have their time monopolized by one person for the whole night – so, don’t create a hostage situation for someone else.? Also, don't just talk with the person who makes you feel the most comfortable. Choose to end conversations after 7 minutes – that feels like a good target.? You can bow out of a talk by saying, “Well, thank you for the conversation.? I know I could ask you 20 more questions, but I don’t want to monopolize your time.? I’ll be sure to follow up on LinkedIn.”?

10.? Follow Up on LinkedIn.? At the end of the night, follow up on LinkedIn to all of those you met.? (If your LinkedIn isn’t updated, use this guide to get it setup!). Send them a note, too, and share why you valued the connection.? If it makes sense, invite them for a follow up.?

See?? Easy, right?? The key to effective networking is planning and preparation.? Good luck!!

Angie Morgan is the New York Times Best-Selling Author of SPARK, Bet on You, and Leading from the Front. She hosts the Take the Lead program - a one-day women's leadership conference, and co-hosts the Executive Coaching Mastermind Take AIM.