Tone-Deaf Leadership: Why It’s Driving Teachers Out

The Moment That Opened My Eyes

Would you believe I had a boss who questioned why I started tai chi with my daughter during one of the hardest periods of my life?

It was early 2020. I’d just lost my mom on January 25th. My daughter, then 14, was struggling with anxiety from the loss and the whispers of a global pandemic.

To cope, we turned to tai chi—it gave us a way to heal and bond. But when I told my boss I needed to restructure my commitments to prioritize my family, her response shocked me:

“It’s a breach of contract.”

That moment wasn’t just about me. It revealed something much bigger.

The Leadership Crisis in Education

Too many leaders in education are micromanaging, tone-deaf, and fear-driven. Instead of supporting their teams, they lean into control. Here’s what I’ve seen:

• Performative Support: Policies and gestures that look good on paper but fail to meet real needs.
• Fear Tactics Over Trust: Leaders who use rigid procedures and compliance as tools to maintain control.
• Ignoring Humanity: Moments that demand empathy are met with rulebooks.

This isn’t just my story. It’s happening across classrooms, schools, and entire industries—and it’s driving teachers out of the profession.

What Effective Leadership Looks Like

Leadership can be better. It has to be better. Here’s what good leaders do:

• Show Up: Step into classrooms (or workspaces) to listen, learn, and connect.
• Lead with Empathy: Flexibility and understanding during critical moments build trust and loyalty.
• Focus on Solutions, Not Compliance: Prioritize people over procedures to create real, lasting change.

Imagine if my boss had simply said:

“I understand. Let’s talk about how we can adjust.”

How many teachers—how many employees—would still feel supported and valued today?

What Kind of Leader Do You Want to Be?

That moment with my boss shaped how I view leadership forever.

What about you?

• Have you experienced leadership—good or bad—that shaped how you show up for others?
• What do you believe needs to change to make education (or any workplace) better?

Let’s talk about it. Leadership shapes everything—and it starts with us.

Thank you for reading. I appreciate you taking the time to engage with this newsletter and reflect on the importance of leadership that values humanity over control.

Bonus Read on Medium: If this message resonates with you, I invite you to explore my Medium story, Productivity is Personal: Why Treating People Like They Matter Makes All the Difference. It dives deeper into how prioritizing people transforms outcomes in education and beyond.

?? Read it here!

Warm regards, Lisa Lauro Teacher Diaries