Tips for Successfully Using the TKI with Clients

Excerpt from my new book, Mastering the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument (TKI).

Defining success in using an assessment tool with real people in challenging situations is very complex and thus depends on a great variety of criteria that are based on different stakeholder needs and perspectives. For the sake of convenience, however, I find it useful to sort such “critical success factors” into (1) the PROCESSES of using the assessment/model and (2) the resultant OUTCOMES.

Regarding processes, for me, success in using the TKI tool is my own self-assessment of how well I administered the TKI: how well I explained to my clients the way in which they should respond to the TKI’s instructions and its 30 A/B items — given the particular needs and context of all the persons involved in a conflict situation. More specifically, I look into my clients’ eyes, read the facial expressions, take note of their body language, and, of course, listen to what they say or ask during this process to determine if my objectives and instructions are being received as intended. I guess it is reading the various “social cues” in the setting, while also establishing rapport, so I can tell if my clients have the best chance of taking the TKI tool in the most honest and forthright manner possible. I want to ensure that my clients understand the meaning as well as the implications of their personalized TKI results. I then want to make sure that they can, from this moment forward, apply what they learned from their TKI results to their most important and challenging conflicts.

As we facilitators (i.e., coaches, teachers, trainers, consultants, etc.) develop our “emotional intelligence,” we can use that empathy to assess how well people are responding to our efforts to provide an engaging and effective process for taking — and learning from — the TKI assessment tool.

MOST IMPORTANT: If I happen to have a consultant, coach, or student with me in the client situation, I have the opportunity to receive feedback on those critical process issues when I later ask my colleagues or students: “What did you see in terms of how the people responded to my (1) administering the TKI, (2) interpreting their TKI results, and (3) helping them to significantly improve their conflict-handling behavior?” In some cases, when appropriate, I can also ask my clients for feedback, after the fact. Such feedback from colleagues and clients can provide insights that are far beyond what I could possibly realize on my own (given my human biases) about the success of the PROCESSES used for administering, interpreting, and effectively using the results after taking the TKI tool.

Regarding the OUTCOMES of “a TKI session,” success comes in many forms. For one, if my TKI clients can create a synthesis (by collaborating on the integrative dimension), then each person walks away with their needs fully met. The nature of the resolution, what people say, their body language, etc. will tell me if we have achieved that desired—ultimate—level of success.

But often, the attributes for achieving a collaborative solution are not yet present and cannot be easily established in the short run (e.g., trust, a culture of mutual support, good communication skills, and so forth). In the latter case, success is about getting needs met to some extent (via compromising, for example, or via a combination of competing and accommodating for one aspect of the conflict or the other). Other times, however, avoiding the conflict is a success, because the participants will spend additional time examining their assumptions, collecting more information, and exploring what they really want and need, which will, hopefully, lead to a more successful outcome sometime in the future.

Thus, regarding the content and resolution of the conflict, if a synthesis cannot be achieved (and when that is the case, it’s usually obvious to all), we must define success via other possible outcomes that CAN be achieved in the current situation. Therefore, another indicator of success is whether clients create the necessary attributes in their situation so they CAN use every conflict mode, as needed.

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Kilmann Diagnostics offers a series of?eleven recorded online courses and nine assessment tools?on the four timeless topics: conflict management, change management, consciousness, and transformation. By taking these courses and passing the Final Exams, you can earn your?Certification?in Conflict and Change Management with the Thomas-Kilmann Instrument (TKI). For the most up-to-date and comprehensive discussion of Dr. Kilmann’s theories and methods, take a look at his most recent books:?Creating a Quantum Organization and Mastering the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument (TKI).