Tips for Staying Focused When You Are Overwhelmed

Human beings are busy. We have work which we have to balance with family, managing the household, taking care of life (doctors, dentist, planning vacations etc.) and trying to fit in a bit of time for ourselves. Under normal circumstances this can be overwhelming…how can it possibly all get done, let alone done well?

Add in unusual circumstances, and can’t control, such as weather challenges, health issues, fire/utility problems, acts of God and more, staying calm and focused becomes incredibly difficult. Even situations that are likely short term annoyances such as your Internet is out can have us quickly move from handling things pretty well to overwhelm and melt down. 

I recently had a computer problem that started at 7 AM. I know I did something wrong, but I have no clue what, except all the sudden I had one problem after the other. I’m pretty tech savvy so I figured I could figure it out myself. I spend 3 hours getting some improvement but still problems. I reached out to my computer guy who was only available that evening, which we set up. But in the meantime I was convinced I could figure it out. I spent the next 3 ? hours trying a variety of options, to no avail. Not only did I lose 7+ hours trying to fix this, I was so overwhelmed I couldn’t even do anything else, even cleaning the house felt too taxing.  

Yes having a computer problem is bad, we need our computers. However, I knew that the tech was likely to make time for me that night, and there was a high probability he would fix the problem. Yet I was so overwhelmed by the problem I let it consume me to the point of sucking down hours of my time while attempting to handle it myself, and the mental energy it took from me which interfered with me being able to focus on other things.

This cost me time (dah), and money since I wasn’t putting my time to best use.  

I have no great ideas on how to set aside catastrophes and stay calm. However they don’t have to overwhelm you where the cost (time, money, mental and physical health) is too high. I have ideas to help you stay focused during crisis related times and also when you feel overwhelmed. Take a look.

Spend time on the priority.  I understand that may change when a crisis hits. You have to be flexible during those times and shift your priorities. Crises are unexpected and you can’t plan for them but your ability to shift your focus to handling them, without consuming you is critical.

During regular times, when you aren’t dealing with or facing an upcoming crisis, spend 80% of your time on what’s important, your priorities. We spend way too much time on activities and tasks that aren’t a priority. Priority is defined here as what you absolutely have to do.  

Define your priorities  Whatever your role, if you focus on what absolutely has to be done, it begins to clear the way for you to delegate areas you don’t personally have to handle, and let go of ideas on what you should be doing (i.e. catching up on the big stack of periodicals).  

As you focus on your priorities, start by writing down 10 – 15 that you consider critical. Examples if you are in leadership might be: staff development and retention or identifying key opportunities for improvement, alliances etc. Go through your list and cull it down to no more than seven, six is better.  

These then become what drives your behavior and actions. Then if you’re feeling overwhelmed you can ask yourself are you focused on your priorities? Are you doing activities that are the best and highest use of your time and align with your priorities? If not it’s often the cause of overwhelm.

You can’t focus on all your priorities every day.  Daily a reminder pops up in my Outlook that says “what is the one thing I can do today to move my business forward”? It could be that I have clients all day and that is the priority. Or it could be following up on a proposal or setting up a meeting or finishing a section of content for my website…or something else. The point is that one thing is always part of one of my big priorities.  

I can’t focus on all my priorities at once, but one at a time and one that today will have the greatest impact for me.

Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.  Looking back at my computer dilemma I should have quit after an hour or two at most. I was driven by my need to get it working, my ego that I could likely fix it myself and my impatience that I couldn’t have someone else do it exactly when I wanted it done.  

This was a clear case that just because I could (or mostly could) doesn’t mean I should. My computer tech fixed it in less than 90 minutes. A question to ask yourself is “if I could pay someone else (insert dollar amount) to do this should I be doing it? You’re a busy person. If you could pay someone else $25, $50, $100 an hour you have no business doing it. Delegate or hire out.

When you are overwhelmed, stop and examine why.  Overwhelm comes from focusing on the wrong activities, being unrealistic about how long something may take, a sense that you are having to handle things out of your control (those crisis situations) or feeling like you don’t have the skills to handle it. Most often you can shift your thinking, and shift away from overwhelm.

Working with clients when they get to this place we examine what’s underneath it. Are they unrealistic about what they can do in the alloted time? Are they focused on getting things done that aren’t the best or highest use of their gifts and talents? Have they gotten lost…forgotten their priorities? Once that is identified refocusing their attention on what’s important and urgent and on the priorities reduces overwhelm.

Accept that priorities may change.  Sometimes a priority has to change and that doesn’t make you a bad person, who isn’t productive. An ill parent’s needs become a priority that wasn’t on your priority list. A situation like this might go on for years, requiring this to be a key priority. Something else may have to drop off or you may need to shift around the time you invest in them.

I’m not giving you permission to simply change your priorities at a whim or because you find you’re not focusing on them. I am giving you permission however to acknowledge that at times situations occur that we had no way of anticipating and need our attention.

Linda Finkle

Executives and top performers in leading companies rely on Executive Coach Linda Finkle to call them on their blind spots, expand their influence and create bigger things for themselves and the companies they lead. High-achieving professionals from Ameriprise, Mass Mutual, Blue Cross Blue Shield, major law firms and dozens of others have come to know Linda as their secret weapon to overcome leadership and communication challenges that stand in their way of making an even bigger impact.

Linda is described as ‘the best of both worlds in that she understands revenue pipeline management as well as running an organization day-to-day’ and ‘an invaluable resource and advisor’ by others. No matter how they describe her, clients regularly welcome the benefits that come from their work together. Most notably, clients’ gross revenues skyrocketed, communication skills have been refined creating a lasting ripple effect across the organization, allowing them to make bigger impacts at work and in their personal lives, and learn smarter ways of adding value without burning out.

Known for her great rapport and relationship-focused demeanor, she is often called direct and has a truth-telling way about her. Linda Finkle has coached and trained more than 2,000 leaders in six countries since 2001. Widely known as “The Elephant Chaser”, Linda has a reputation for going straight for the throat of whatever problems a business is having and working closely with leaders and managers to resolve them and to heighten the company’s overall performance. Whether working one-on-one with clients, as an inspiring speaker, as a leadership team facilitator, or with partnerships in distress, Linda is committed to guiding clients to clarity about their communications, behaviors and stumbling blocks that stand in the way of their effectiveness.

Before launching Incedo Group, LLC, Linda built and managed an executive recruiting firm for more than twenty years. Her recruitment agency identified talent for Fortune 500 companies and small to mid-sized business as well, and ranked among the top 10 recruiting firms in the country. Her ability to understand the corporate culture and needs of the company for both the long and short term ensured her clients returned time and again. Even today, clients and candidates from her recruiting days reach out to her for advice, help, and guidance.

Her ability to build trust immediately, her powers of perception and intuition, along with her tactful and direct style, create a space that allows clients to share their truth and receive the feedback they won’t hear from anyone else. It is exactly what they need to make changes to catapult their leadership and companies in powerful ways.