Tips for public speaking

Do you get nervous when public speaking? The first times I had to speak in public in my teens and early twenties I would literally be sick before from my nerves. But, my father said to me 'There are three ways to have impact in this world: through the power of writing, through the power of oratory, and through the power of action. Try to combine all three.' I was determined to learn to communicate effectively so I persisted and forced myself to learn to speak in public.

I've now been speaking at events for about 10 years around the world in all shapes and sizes. I really enjoy it. Often these speaking engagements pay very well.

I was asked by my friend, Edie Lush, for my tips for her book 'How to speak with confidence in public' so I wrote this about my little practice of NLP that I have learned. I hope it helps you next time you have to speak in public:

In your own time when you are really relaxed at home. Close your eyes. Imagine your favorite place on the planet. Somewhere you have been before without a worry in the world. Perhaps your favorite beach. Imagine your partner or best friend lying next to you. Your favorite drink by your side. Feel the sun on your skin. Hear the sound of the waves (or whatever sounds accompany your favorite place). Try to picture every little detail - the color of the water, the texture of the sand, the feeling of being completely relaxed and sublime. Really focus on this and take it all in. Smile.

Then with your right hand stroke your left knuckle. I like to stroke my middle finger with my index finger.

What you are doing is creating a mental association with the feeling of stroking your knuckle. Since this is a very particular feeling your body can remember it. Practice this a few times in a relaxed place.

Now when you are about to go up and speak stroke you knuckle (close your eyes if you need to). Your mind will bring back the image of your favorite place. This will distract you from the nervousness you will be feeling about speaking. It will lower your heart rate and allow you to take a deep breath and collect yourself. With that deep breath let it out with a smile and know that you are ready to share yourself with the people you are speaking to. Remember to be authentically yourself. Share your heart and humanity with the people you are speaking to. Know that your story is striking a nerve with your audience and they want to listen to you and want you to be successful. Go and hit it out of the park.

If your nerves get the better of you at any point whilst you are speaking, just pause, take a breath and stroke your knuckle and then carry on again.