The Tipping Point - From Biz Dev to Personal Dev

Well then, for those of you who know me, it will come as no surprise that writing has usually played second fiddle to my main broadcast platform — my ability to talk!

Running a consultancy called Big Knows certainly attracts attention. But it’s safe to say that in over four years, not once have I ever put pen to paper. I can certainly talk a good game but blog posting, nah, that’s a playing field for others to shine… Until now that is!

A little more action, a lot less conversation

The last 24 months or so have been a whirlwind. I reached the tipping point — thanks, Mr Gladwell — just after reaching 47.

On paper, I had it all. A wonderful wife/best mate, two adorable kids and loving families. We lived in the delightful and dynamic landscape of The Lake District and had a thriving business based primarily out of my birthplace and spiritual home, Manchester. I was well connected — a respected player in the greater Manchester and north west business community.

Then I got the dreaded cancer scare, the big C. Of all places, in my sinuses. And when you call yourself Big Knows, I suppose you have to see the funny side…

Thankfully I was clear, but post-op meant six weeks of me time.

Time to think, time to reflect on who I was, what I wanted and most significantly, who I wanted to become.

At the time though, my seeds were being sewn. My crystal ball was perhaps a little cloudy as all I wanted to do was get right back on the horse. Get back out doing what I loved most — helping creative and digital agencies find and win the right type of new business. That and earn some decent dollar of course!

Yet on the horizon there was this Kay Johnson GeeMasterclass I’d been booked onto for weeks — KJG are award winning Manchester Chartered Accountants and business advisors who run regular Masterclasses, pulling in top quality speakers as well as providing a platform for some seriously good connecting.

An event I was told was “right up my street” — thanks Richard Venables for your dogged and heartfelt persistence! The keynote speaker, a chap I’d heard much about, was as positive as they come, a motivational speaker of the highest order.

Within seconds of this man bounding onto the stage, I was hooked. Line and sinker. Step forward Michael Finnigan, the founder of i2i, a business that was here to help people “be the best they could be”.

I was mesmerised as his keynote unravelled. He was in my head, my heart and he touched a spirit within me that I thought had long gone…

He talked my language. He even referenced materials and performance techniques that resonated with what I had been doing for years. Culture, brand, behaviour, profiling, values, I knew this stuff. I was good at it.

i2i, a business that at its heart, wants to “change millions of lives for the better”.

Like a groupie, I cornered the poor man at the lunch buffet. We talked for what felt like ages, a queue formed behind, not for the food but for an audience with him. He was popular and in demand. We got on. His attitude was infectious. He too enjoyed my chat and my perspective. So, as you do, we swapped business cards, promising to keep in touch…

True to the claim of his keynote, I vowed to be the best Biz Dev consultant I could be. I stepped up in terms of my targeting. I began connecting with bigger and more brand savvy agencies. I looked at recruiting associates, advocates of the Big Knows DNA.

Why?

Because I wanted Big Knows to change the creative and digital agency landscape where the art of winning new business was concerned. The scene was set. I set my goals, I could see my dream.

However, my big vision for Big Knows began to shift remarkably that summer…

A couple of big agency opportunities presented themselves — real game changers in terms of revenue and profile. They were contracts that we should have landed and prospects that I jumped through hoops for, but they just fizzled out. Was somebody telling me something?

But back to that real tipping point. Michael Finnigan and I met in early October, just for an hour as this guy is as busy as he is popular. But what an hour! We talked footie, associate models, each other’s businesses, and I had the mother of all nosebleeds — a story for another time. But we got on like a house on fire.

There was this intense yet comfortable vibe. It just felt right. So much so that when we were wrapping up the hour, I unexpectedly proclaimed to Michael that I wanted in.

I was captivated by the very essence of their model.

To briefly outline: the i2i model is focused on identifying, realising and developing the true capabilities within people, organisations and teams. It has a strong emphasis on building and sustaining winning behaviours, as well as teaching and promoting practical techniques to drive that high performance.

What’s not to like, I thought? I wanted in. I wanted to be a part of his future vision for i2i…

So, I started their training courses in late 2015 to become an associate practitioner of their psychological behavioural strategies. And since, well I’ve seen a remarkable change in my attitude to dealing with the ‘stuff’ that life throws at you.

While I may appear to sound evangelical about it, the courses I went on blew my mind. They awoke desires, punched a few home truths and more — and boy were they emotional! Beyond emotional in actual fact. I realised that I’d been drifting more than I thought.

Those i2i principles started me on a journey that I’ve not yet finished — and probably never will. It’s made me consider my relationships with family, my children, my friends. It’s refined my focus on my career, and ultimately my life goals.

It’s made me ask:

When I look back at my life, what and who do I truly want to see?

When I agreed to become one of Michael’s latest associate partners, he guaranteed that the learnings he would share would teach and help me to cope with whatever challenges I was experiencing in my personal life.

And they did. But they also gave me deeper perspective on where I wanted to be professionally.

Helping creative and digital agencies find and win business was no longer a big enough purpose for me. Was Big Knows about to expire? No. It was just going to finally fulfill its real mission of helping change peoples’ lives for the better.

It was going to finally focus on what it has probably known all along…

To help people be the best they can be, you have to look yourself in the mirror and be true to who you want to be.

Bloody hell, yet another tipping point!

No Magic Wand

Let’s face it, there ain’t no magic trick to help us make life changes. No book, course, or film can do that. Yet equipping yourself with the right tools can certainly help.

You wouldn’t climb a mountain with just a pair of trainers and a pac-a-mac — you’d be a fool to do so! I suppose what I’m saying is that...

to make a change in your life, you need to be ready. You need to prepare the ground for launch.

Maybe too many of us expect change in an instant and therefore perhaps don’t commit properly. Looking back, I think I (like many of my peers) expected too much from change. I wanted it to be over and done with so I could get on with other things.

Reality Check! After several intense days of an emotional rollercoaster and ‘life analysis’, I finally realised yes, I needed to change — but I needed to embrace change like a long lost friend.

So, the big question is, when’s the right time?

And there’s only one answer, I’m afraid — NOW!

Not tomorrow, not next month, not when your diary is next free. Now.

Because you know what? You’ll never have the time. You’ll continue to submerge yourself in the daily grind and gravel of life. You’ll book up that diary because being busy is being productive… Right?

So, do it now. Take stock. Get perspective. Give yourself time.

And yes, I’m going to use that good old cliche — it’s a marathon, not a 100m sprint. But it’s true. It does take time to get to a better place — — one small step, one giant leap ring any bells?

Trust me on this, the journey is well worth it.

Yes, it’s challenging. Yes it’s scary. And yes, it’s most definitely emotional. But it can be life-changing too — and guaranteed, if you take it all in, you’ll achieve fantastic self-awareness and, ultimately, a better you.

I’ve seen folk smash their personal bests by understanding the real power of setting an (impossible) goal and turning it into an (inevitable) dream with 5 mins off a 5K run in a matter of weeks — no easy task when they were pretty fast anyway.

One person who attended a course had a dose of real self-awareness. They admitted that they’d been wallowing in procrastination for 25 years of their life. Blaming it on others and other life events. It was a wake up call. Others now have the tools to cope with challenging situations, with one MD saying a member of their team who’d participated was now turbo-charged.

OK, I hear you thinking, this is a sales-pitch… but trust me, it’s anything but!

The people above are real and the changes are phenomenal.

But for many it’s just about being in a happier, calmer place. For others, it’s helping them achieve their goals — physical or otherwise. 

It isn’t about creating robots, just making individuals happier and more aligned to their life goals.

There are hundreds of self-help books out there and for some this will be enough. There are some amazing authors too, including W.Clement Stone, Simon Sinek and Seth Godin (check out my reading list at the end of this for my personal inspirations).

Yet, going through the process in a group with others is somehow an amazing experience. You’re not alone. You have a support network. And many continue to support each other way beyond the course completion.

So where am I now? Still on the bloody journey and enjoying the ride, that’s where.

I’ve become ‘…a changed man; calmer and more energised…” according to a good friend. I’m still living it and I doubt it will ever finish. As a parent — and now a single Dad with two amazing kids — I’m sure there will be more challenges ahead, but at least I know now that I’m ready and equipped to meet them head on.

And I'm lucky that the kids have an amazing Mum and that we are still friends...Life's just too short to create challenges when it comes to the well-being of your nearest and dearest. It's all about creating a positive life template for their future success.

So the question now is, are you ready to change and be the best you can be?

Bringing my story to an end (this particular chapter, anyway), you’ll be pleased to hear I’m now a fully-fledged associate partner and practitioner with i2i. Since April 2016, I have been delivering their positive change programmes to people and companies in greater Manchester to great acclaim.

Foe me, it’s been a real honour and privilege to have had the opportunity to spend three days in the lives of some absolutely cracking people.

An experience that has been truly humbling for me and for them.

So massive thanks for reading and sharing what has been a series of personal tipping points these past few years. I have been fortunate to have been guided and supported by many wonderful characters. People who have devoted their time, expertise, compassion and understanding to help me truly find my purpose. You know who you are.

Wow, for a fella who hasn’t written before, got to admit a certain fondness for this method of storytelling… Watch out Will Stone, I’m coming for you! And who knows, it might only be four weeks (not years) before I put pen to paper again!

PS. That reading list I mentioned… See what you think. And please feel free to share back any other gems that have really helped you on the road to fulfilment.

Simon Sinek — Start with Why

Malcolm Gladwell — The Tipping Point

Malcolm Gladwell — Blink

Daniel Pink — A Whole New Mind

Seth Godin — Purple Cow

Michael Finnigan — They Did, You Can

Michael Finnigan — Impossible to Inevitable

Martin Robert Hall — Optimise Yourself

W Clement Stone — Success Through A Positive Mental Attitude

W Clement Stone — The Success System That Never Fails

Napoleon Hill — Think and Grow Rich

Professor Damian Hughes — How To Think Like Sir Alex Ferguson

Professor Steve Peters — The Chimp Paradox

Richard Thaler & Cass Sunstein — Nudge

Daniel Priestley — Key Person of Influence

Bob Burg — The Go Giver

Richard Carlson — Stop Thinking, Start Living