Tip 3: Use conflict to drive the story

Fourteen years ago, I decided it was time to choose. I booked a weekend at the Gladstone House in Toronto. It was called the Gladstone Hotel back then and consisted of "37 dynamite rooms, each designed by a local artist of note," although I am not sure it's designed that way now. I stayed there thinking the artsy environment would inspire a revelation or reveal some hidden truth to me. Or reveal me, to me.

In that colorful, tiny room, I sat at the narrow desk, wondering how a person should feel when they're about to upend their lives. I looked around, absorbing the freedom and fear that artist of note may have felt at the prospect of using an entire room as their canvas. You have the choice to paint what you want, but you're still constricted by the limitations you place on yourself. That conflict, that classic battle between who you are and who you think you are, raged in my head as I opened the notebook I bought for the occasion. At the top of the blank sheet, I wrote, "Starting my own business." Beneath that, I drew a T-chart, something I learned about when teaching a decision-making class years earlier. On the left side of the T, I wrote "pros." And on the right, "cons." The rest is history.

For me, inner conflict is so much more interesting to write about. There's usually no right or wrong, just the consequence of choosing one decision over another. But, there are different types of conflicts, and the one you choose depends on your intent. Some argue that conflict is required in all stories. I primarily focus on stories of transformation where the story is the conflict because either you don't want to change, but something is making you do so, or you do want to change, but something is stopping you. Change often feels like the toughest battle of all.

The Benefit of Conflict

It benefits your stories to introduce conflicts or challenges that the protagonist must overcome. Conflict creates tension and keeps the audience engaged. It's essential in most traditional narratives. Conflict plays a crucial role in personal storytelling as it drives the narrative forward and adds depth to the story. Usually, the protagonist's implicit or explicit goal is to resolve the conflict, which becomes the story's focus. That motivation is what is meant by "drive the story."

Conflict, whether internal (such as personal struggles or emotional turmoil) or external (like challenges with others or the environment), creates tension and intrigue, keeping the audience engaged. It's the catalyst for character development, allowing the storyteller to showcase growth, resilience, and transformation.

Conflicts often lead to pivotal moments or turning points in the story, making the narrative more dynamic and compelling. Moreover, they provide relatability, as audiences often see reflections of their own challenges and conflicts, encouraging a deeper emotional connection.

Examples

Internal Conflict: Balancing Business Ambitions with Personal Values

"As my company grew, exceeding even my expectations, I was constantly torn between the aggressive growth strategies my board pushed for and my commitment to my values. It all came to a head when we considered a lucrative project that, while ethical, went against everything I believed in. As the pressure showed up in my health, personal life, and work, it was clear I had landed at a crossroads, questioning whether realizing my dream was worth compromising who I was. This struggle wasn't just a business decision but a test of my integrity and character."

This example uses internal conflict to drive the story, creating a moral dilemma that tests the protagonist's character. It makes the narrative more compelling, as readers are drawn into the protagonist's struggle and are eager to see their choice. Such conflict also adds depth to the character, making them more relatable and human.

External Conflict: Competing Against a Corporate Goliath

"When I started my small organic food store, I knew I'd face competition. But nothing prepared me for the day a major supermarket chain opened a store across the street. From that point forward, competition motivated me to keep my business afloat. I had to innovate, from personalizing customer service to sourcing unique local products. It was a classic David vs. Goliath scenario, and I was determined not to let the corporate giant crush my dream."

The external conflict of competing against a larger, more powerful entity is a classic storyline that resonates with many. It creates clear tension and a rooting interest for the underdog (the protagonist). This type of conflict drives the narrative by presenting significant challenges the protagonist must overcome, keeping readers engaged and invested in the outcome.

Interpersonal Conflict: Partner Disagreements in a Family Business

"Running a family business with my brother was never easy, but when our visions for the company's future began to diverge, we both knew we were in trouble. He wanted to expand rapidly, while I believed in slow and steady growth. The constant war of wills put a strain on both our business and personal relationships. Board meetings turned into a text for both of us, with the future of our family legacy at stake. Every day became a personal and emotional battle, as I sought to find a middle ground to satisfy my brother's ambitions and my own."

Interpersonal conflict, especially in a family business setting, adds emotional complexity to the story. It explores the dynamics of family relationships in a business context, making the story more relatable and emotionally charged. This conflict drives the narrative by creating tension and uncertainty about the business's and the family's future.

Conflict is essential in personal storytelling as it drives the narrative, creates tension, and adds depth. Whether it's internal struggles, external challenges, or interpersonal disagreements, these conflicts engage the audience, foster character development, and enhance the story's relatability. Stories featuring such conflicts resonate more deeply with audiences as they mirror real life's ups and downs.

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