Time is a Thief

It hit me. The first semester of my senior year is almost over. I just applied for graduation? One more month. What?? How is it going by so fast??

For the past 21 years, school has been the cornerstone of my life. Sure, I’ve held jobs since I was about 15, but my main focus has always been school. Get good grades. Join clubs. Study hard. Repeat. It’s a routine I know inside and out, and now it’s hard to wrap my head around the idea that, in a few short months, that chapter will close. The finish line is finally in sight. Part of me feels a sense of relief—I’ve made it this far. I’m about to accomplish something that felt so distant not that long ago. But there’s also this quiet, creeping fear. I’m faced with a question that’s becoming more real by the day: what comes next?

I've always prided myself on being a hard worker, so I’m not concerned about my ability to face whatever challenges lie ahead. It’s the idea of change that unsettles me. I’ve never been one to adjust easily to big shifts. Some people seem to thrive on change, almost like it fuels them. I envy that resilience—their ability to adapt and go with the flow. I, on the other hand, find so much comfort in routine, in knowing what’s next. It’s a little like having a safety net beneath me. But deep down, I know that stepping outside of my comfort zone is where the real growth happens. It’s where I’ll find new versions of myself I haven’t met yet.

I remember feeling similarly at the start of college. It was such a big adjustment, and I doubted myself constantly. Would I fit in? Would I make friends? Would I be able to handle the workload? I never imagined that this place, this experience, and the friendships I formed would end up meaning so much to me. College has been one of the best things that’s ever happened in my life, shaping me in ways I didn’t expect. I think back to who I was freshman year and who I am now, and the difference is night and day. This chapter has transformed me in the best ways.

But now, as I think about the future—about moving out of my small college town, meeting new people, diving into new opportunities—I can’t help but feel a little nervous. I’m excited, but there’s also a sense of loneliness looming, especially when I think about leaving the friends and community I’ve built here. There’s so much ahead, and it’s happening so quickly. I find myself wishing time would slow down just a bit so I could savor every last moment, every conversation, every adventure with my friends. It feels like I’m in a race against the clock to soak it all in before it slips away.

Honestly, these blogs have been more than just an assignment for me; they’ve become a way to process and document my journey. Writing has allowed me to dig deep into my thoughts and fears, and in doing so, it’s given me a sense of peace. What started as a task to check off the "to-do" list is now something I look forward to. Every blog captures a piece of this time in my life—a time that’s moving far too quickly but a time I know I’ll look back on with so much gratitude.

So here I am, facing the unknown, trying to remind myself that it’s okay to feel everything all at once. It’s okay to be excited, nervous, happy, and sad all rolled into one. This is the end of one chapter, but it’s also the beginning of another. And as overwhelming as that feels, I’m ready (or at least as ready as I’ll ever be).

Anyway, I apologize for the life crisis!?I guess senior year has a way of bringing up all the feels!?

-Laney :)