It is Time for a Personal Revolution, A Dead Gay Guy, and Organizing a Virtual Class Reunion

"The most important kind of freedom is to be what you really are. You trade in your reality for a role. You trade in your sense for an act. You give up your ability to feel, and in exchange, put on a mask. There can't be any large-scale revolution until there's a personal revolution, on an individual level. It's got to happen inside first."

— Jim Morrison

I have got another confession to make; I slept in. In an unusual move, I laid in bed with my Queen until 7:00 a.m., unheard of before these times, now something that is an occasional gift. It is hump day, this sleeping in thing would have occurred on the weekend, but never a weekday, I was diligent, I was driven, I was the guy that got up at 5:00 a.m.

But now, well, that is another story. I’m still diligent, I’m always driven, and I do occasionally based on my schedule get up at 5:00 a.m., but not every day.  I am beginning to cherish life, and I suspect you are too. I am on several group calls where people are not doing well; they are scared, angry, and confused. I empathize with them, granted I am in a functional space, a good place, had planned financially for a “shit hits the fan event,” but I am not blind to those suffering.  I have tried since the beginning to be a beacon, and my light is still shining bright.

I woke up wondering how I might have fared in some of the other dwellings I have resided in over the years. I thought about my farmhouse I lived in when married, I thought about my “condo” in Farmland, our Carmel home, hour Indy home, how the experience would have been far different than today. Each space has a bevy of memories, but I have learned you can never go back home.

I learned a friend of a friend killed himself. I do not think Covid19 is the only killer these days. As people take stock, look inward, some are feeling as if they are a burden. Let us take a moment to check on our friends and family living alone, reminding them we love them, and they are essential. We are all not built for this time; we will lose some, it is war, buck up little camper, be strong.

I was on a call with a young man I was connected to through a mutual friend. His name was Drew; he is a financial planner guy. We did not talk business, just life; he’s a relationship guy, made a great impression. I felt as if I was being interviewed; he asked me, “have you always been this eclectic?”  I laughed, “no, young man, I’ve have not always been this guy; I have evolved or as some like to say devolved.”

For those who do not know, I was not always the man I am today. I used to wear a suit, I used to have the hair someone in my position should have, but one day I decided to be me. I was inspired by Oscar Wilde, a dead gay guy from long ago that said: “Be yourself, everyone else is taken.” My ex-wife once stated, “you are an embarrassment to our family,” and I guess to some I am. I refuse to conform to what society thinks I should be; I decided to be me.

I have written before; I’m not for everyone, I try and connect with 8% of the population that can tolerate my unique existence. Some of my friends have watched me evolve and stayed along for the ride. Others have removed me due to my transformation. For every one that let me go, I have found ten amazing humans to replace. The way I show up is intentional, curious, loving, and unique. That is me today; I will die this way; I have no plans to change.

You too can be yourself; you do not have to conform, if you want to create a different look, now is the time. Blame it on Covid19, come out looking like you, not the mask you were wearing before. If ever there was a time of evolution, now is that time.

Change your body, gain some weight, maybe lose some weight. Begin an exercise program that shapes your body like never before. You’ve had 30 days of isolation; people have not seen you, have amazing would it be to show up as a new and improved version of yourself?  Throw your clothes away, get a new wardrobe, shop online at used stores, get eclectic, be colorful, or go with all black, it is slimming. Now is the time for a personal revolution; don’t miss this opportunity.

My tank is running empty; my soup is made, time for me to get rolling on my day. I’ve got some Zoom calls; I’m thinking of organizing a class of 1987 Monroe Central Virtual Reunion. Mulling the mechanics of how that might come together if you are a class member and want to help, DM me, I am thinking mid-May, this might be fun. Thanks for sipping my soup, taking the time to read the ramblings of a curious, loving man that gives two shits what you think and loves thyself. It is a good recipe for life; you might want to use it for yourself. Cheers, see you tomorrow.  A subtle reminder to “be what you really are.”

"The most important kind of freedom is to be what you really are. You trade in your reality for a role. You trade in your sense for an act. You give up your ability to feel, and in exchange, put on a mask. There can't be any large-scale revolution until there's a personal revolution, on an individual level. It's got to happen inside first."

— Jim Morrison