Time

One of the first articles I wrote during COVID was a very personal story about my wife's journey with breast cancer. In that article, I detailed my struggles to reconcile the paradox of time during a global pandemic, in similar fashion to how time took on a different significance while waiting in a surgical waiting room while my wife as having surgery for breast cancer. The start of COVID was a time of high stakes, immense stress, and social isolation for many of us. I had intended the article to be an amalgamation of thoughts about the precious nature of time, how to invest time wisely based on priorities, and how time seemed to move differently based on emotions and personal circumstances. All the while, hoping to link my personal struggles to what we were all experiencing and struggling with during COVID. I recall being extremely nervous about sharing something so personal and letting people know I was wrestling with all of this. Not surprisingly, showing vulnerability as a leader resonated with many people, and I was literally deluged with people reaching out to me, sharing their stories, confiding in me, comforting me, and connecting to tell me they were grappling with the same things.

To harken back to that article, and to connect it to my New Year's resolution focused on timeless truths, I challenged myself to better prioritize limited time and to focus on meaningful pursuits. The rhetorical question I raised was how do we spend our time, and how do we prioritize what's important in our lives for the benefit of others? Like it or not, there is a "reckoning" for the minutes spent throughout the day and week. I think I can safely say that none of us wants to waste our time, but so often we do. I am no different here. Time flies by when I am working on something that is aligned to the mission, vision, and values of a just cause. I revel in investing time in the people and teams that I serve and have the pleasure to care for and support.? I regret not spending more time with my family.? I am remorseful of wasted time that was spent selfishly, or at the bequest of others that did not value that time. I am reminded by events like COVID, my wife's cancer journey, and the deaths of friends and family that life is all too short and far too precious to waste. That's so easy to say, but so very difficult to do something about as I recently highlighted in my thoughts about our habits.

This past week, my family’s next-door neighbor suddenly passed away from an unexpected stroke.? We unfortunately went from happy conversations with a neighbor who was always congenial, kind, and interested, to missing someone and wishing we had more time with them.? Over the years as an Emergency Physician, I have been confronted by the absurdity of how quickly life can change, as people are afflicted with unexpected illness, trauma, or tragedy.? Perhaps the only wisdom or comfort that comes from such terrible events (other than realizing this is unfortunately part of being human), is helping us to remember how precious time is as a commodity; once spent, it is gone forever.? Our time is finite, and as a result, we should (in my opinion) spend it developing our relationships and in the service of others in our work and community.?? I am reminded of the importance of a hug, or telling someone how much you care for them.? I certainly don’t do that as much as I should.? To honor “Mr. Neal” this week, I pledge to do better.? Life is too short, but it can also be rich and rewarding due to our human connections.? It’s a shame we often don’t value those bonds until after they are broken through separation or loss.? As we head into the weekend, please join me in telling someone that you love, support, or work with how much they mean to you.???