Time to Evaluate: Do you ever wonder what you "wait" For?

Growing up in an African culture I used to think that waiting for someone you love to be ready is the ultimate declaration of love if not a form of flattery, how naive I was you must be thinking. But maybe in one way or the other culture aside, you must have had a naive thought about love and relationships. Haven't you? :)

There is no amount of self-flagellation that will add up to enough credit to get someone to reciprocate your feelings. We have all lost time waiting for someone who never noticed us — or, at least, never noticed the person we actually were. We have all done that dance of being The Perfect Princess or Prince in an effort to trick someone into finding us lovable. But waiting only always hurts the one who engages in it, only humiliates those who put aside their self-respect long enough to say that someone else’s happiness is more important than their own.

But let's take our thoughts to those moments...Exactly what is it that you are waiting for? Do you even know? Are you waiting for a declaration of love? Are you waiting for someone to change? Are you waiting for someone to recognize how loyal and patient you are? Are you waiting for a rainbow sign in the sky? or his heart pop out like in the movies? Is it worth it? then friends come to the soften the blow....ooh give him the time or some space, or he’s just afraid of commitment and I just need to reassure him, or he builds walls and it's your job to remind him to open those walls.

But think about the feelings you have for him. How easy and natural and obvious it feels. How you don’t even need to question whether or not you should be with him because it just feels right in your veins. How, even if you were scared of committing to someone or getting hurt or opening yourself up, you were still willing to do it, because your heart had already made up your mind. You wanted to be with him, so you were. The decision was simple. It really wasn’t even a decision at all now imagine that feeling not reciprocated because he is not ready?! Never will he be...How will you settle for such a person?

Waiting for someone means that you are pouring salt on your own cuts and acting like it doesn’t burn. It means that you have agreed to be the person they “settle” for after exploring all other options. It means that you are surrendering yourself to rejection over and over again and acting like it’s the natural process of waiting.

Time in this era at least now that am older and have traveled the globe made me realize is very precious. You can not allow your life to be on hold because you are too afraid to be alone...remember misery love company and what you feed your mind will always outwardly come to you. Truth is we are born alone and eventually die alone no matter how positively you might want to define that it's painfully true.

And you might think you need to be rewarded for being patient with this person and you could be right but what will recognition give you? temporary relief? is that what you need forever or at the moment when you are going through the "waiting phase"? Surely even a mediocre day lived fully is better than the best day which is spent in waiting.

Love yourself enough to be hard on yourself and if you must wait; freaking wait for someone who will reciprocate your love the same way; wait for someone who is capable of recognizing diamond in the midst of too many stones; But the smallest of silver linings is this: allow your heart to break once – instead of breaking your heart a million times by convincing yourself with soft blow talks.