Thursdays Leadership Insight; Ditch Making Resolutions and Build Habits Starting with a Habit of Intentional Reflection in Six Steps

I am not a fan of resolutions. The reason is simple they don't last. I am living proof of that. Studies vary on how many people make resolutions at New Year. The number varies anywhere from 51%- 87%. Whichever number is more accurate does not matter, as studies show that resolutions begin disappearing quickly after being made. Jeff Haden on January 3, 2020, Inc . Magazine article, A Study of 800 Million Activities Predicts Most New Year's Resolutions Will Be Abandoned on January 19: How to Create New Habits That Stick. Even so, a resolution isn't the problem. Most people fail because of the way they try to achieve their goals.

Haden notes, "Approximately?80 percent of people who make New Year's?resolutions have dropped?them by the second week of February. In a Blog by Bob Tiede, "Leading with Questions, he cites the work of Jon Gordon, Dan Britton, and Jimmy Page,?authors of ?"One Word That Will Change Your Life."?They share: "87% of us make New Year's Resolution every year.?Although these resolutions are meant to be good and well-intentioned solutions, unfortunately, they are built on a flawed assumption of more effort,?willpower, and goal setting. We set to-do goals instead of to-be goals.?Success is measured by what we accomplish instead of whom we become. Both articles point to a different approach to resolutions. They may use different terms; however, change comes from developing habits to learn, refine, and apply to be more effective in anything cooking, running, reading, and leadership.

Habits are intentional practices learned and refined over time to be applied in our lives. Building better habits become, like Gordon, Britton, and Page state to -??be goals, habits that drive intentional actions to guide our leadership and lives. The foundational habit to be developed first and practiced daily to learn and refine any other habit is reflection. This week Thursday leadership insight focus' on the intentional development of a practice /habit of reflection as a formative as well as a summative measure of your progress on your goals and plans and how to teach it to those you lead

As noted by Richard Carlson, "Reflection Is is one of the most underused yet powerful tools for success for leaders." The reasons are simple developing habits requires one to learn, practice, apply and reflect. Learning any new skill to develop a habit, running, swimming, writing, and leadership requires intentional daily reflection to gauge how we are doing. Without reflection, we can never learn to review and revise what we are doing because we have no gauge for measuring progress. Leaders in every sector often neglect reflection as an intentional practice despite understanding its importance.?

There are three reasons for this neglect.

1. First, the old myth that we already know or should know all as a leader. Leadership skills are learned and developed over time, and the context of leadership is fluid. This past year-plus has shown that leadership must pivot and respond to meet new challenges.

2. Second, many leaders see reflection as an end of the project, quarter, or end-of-year event. Take some time at a retreat or off-site event to write what we learned and maybe write some goals. This one-time activity of periodic reflection is much like a Final examination in schooling or gaining a license. It is a reflection on what we have done, a summative evaluation. This process has value in learning; however, the events have passed. True reflection practiced daily gives the clarity and agility to adapt or pivot. If you coached a sport, would you reflect on your team's progress only at the start and end of the seasons.? How much better would your golf (any other sport ) be if you reflected at the start and the end of golf season? Any Coach or golfer, or knitter knows that intentional, repeated daily reflection makes for the intentional continual development of any habit. Reflection is needed as a daily event and an end-of-project, quarter, or year event. Reflection then is a summative and formative process.

3. Third, leaders focus on being busy, and reflection doesn't always feel like being busy. Reflection time is an activity, and as Peter Druckers often said, "Follow effective action with quiet reflection. From that quiet reflection will come even more effective action".Maybe it would be helpful to call self-directed reflection daily and periodic feedback.

??Developing the habit of daily and periodic reflection is foundational to learning or refining leadership skills to develop as habits crucial to leaders in all sectors.

Harry Kraemer of the Northwestern Kellog School of Business refers to self-reflection as a foundational skill for all leaders to develop their skills?In a recent article How Self-Reflection Can Make You a Better Leader (northwestern.edu), setting aside 15 minutes a day can help you prioritize, prepare, and build a stronger team Kraemer notes he has made a nightly ritual of self-reflection. "Every day," he emphasizes. Stepping back from the fray is how Kraemer, once the manager of 52,000 employees, avoided "running around like a chicken with his head cut off." instead of constant acceleration, Kraemer says, leadership demands periods of restraint and consideration, even—perhaps especially—during a crisis. Leaders must regularly turn off the noise and ask themselves what they stand for and what kind of an example they want to set. "Self-reflection is not spending hours contemplating your navel," Kraemer says. "No! It's: What are my values, and what am I going to do about it? This is not some intellectual exercise. It's all about self-improvement, being self-aware, knowing myself, and getting better." "If I'm going to help you develop as a leader, one of the first things I'm going to try to do is to help you understand the tremendous benefit of self-reflection." Self-reflection's effects go beyond the self; Kraemer points out: "If I don't know myself, is it possible for me to lead myself? I doubt that. If I can't lead myself, how could I possibly lead other people?" This same thinking was mirrored by management /leadership

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"Follow effective action with quiet reflection. From that quiet reflection will come even more effective action

??????????????????????????????Peter Drucker.

In athletic teams, the power of daily and periodic reflection is evident. Legendary Basketball coach and leadership expert John Wooden stressed daily intentional reflection winning 10 NCAA Basketball Championships. He often stressed, "going slow to go fast."The power of intentional reflection can be seen every weekend at this time in playoffs sports. Many of the same teams seem to get better at the playoffs/championships every year. I would bet daily reflection and periodic reflection has something to do with this.

Dwight Eisenhower as commander of Allied forces in Europe in World War II, University President of Columbia, and two-term President of the United States, understood learning leadership skills using reflection. He stated, " The one quality that can be developed by studious reflection and practice?is the leading of men."

Recently I had the good fortune to attend an in-service presentation at Kirby School District 140 in Tinley Park, Il. The presenter was a nationally recognized elementary school principal, Hamish Brewer. Brewer works in a large Virginia school system and specializes in being a turnaround Principal. He works in, as he says, "tough" places to improve academic performance. He has been recognized as the best-selling author of Relentless: Changing Lives by Disrupting the Educational Norm and speaker. Brewer has been a Principal of the year at the State and National levels, and his schools have been showcased on national media and in docuseries. It was apparent in the presentation and meeting with the administrative team that his greatest pride is in progress his students and families have made in continually meeting state mandates requirements and the growth of his teachers. He is quick to credit his teachers, yet his leadership and the power of reflection are evident. The model he practices and teaches is based on love and care for all to do their best. He cites the FISH philosophy made famous at Pikes Fishmarket, choose your attitude, have fun and add value. Brewer practices and teaches the intentional practice daily and periodic reflections for his teachers, noting "as teachers ourselves we have to make it a habit to reflect and take the time to reflect everyday" Intentional daily reflection is a requirement for all students well. The model of intentional daily and periodic practice of reflection at Fred Lynn Middle school is a part of their success. This is a model of success for any organization.

Leaders in many sectors have demonstrated the development and refinement of leadership skills by daily intentional practice. Developing your leadership skills and habits, committing to a daily practice of developing an Intentional practice of reflection, can provide a time to focus on the days' events, become clear on our thinking what we learned, and develop a flexible approach to opportunities and challenges. John Maxwell stresses the intentional practice of reflection, noting "an activity reflected upon becomes an insight for future action." I would add that without reflection, an activity becomes a?memory that fades quickly.

There are five steps to consider as you develop an intentional practice of daily and periodic reflection;

?"The first step is the hardest – Make a commitment to yourself, for yourself."?

Mary Kay Ash

Step 1. Commit to a process of daily and periodic reflection. Your commitment is shown in your calendar. When and where is the best time for reflection? The key to impactful daily reflection is setting aside time to commit 10-15 minutes to be to yourself quietly. Periodic reflection times can also be planned out and scheduled. Would that time be at the end of a quarter, meeting, or event?

Step 2. Commit to the questions that will guide your daily reflection. Questions consistently asked spark thinking and, as Maxwell says, create insights for future action.

Here are sample questions.

Two from Harry Kraemer

1. Did I do my best?

2. did I do the right thing?

Two from Hamish Brewer

1. Did I act with integrity, doing my best?

2. What legacy did I create today

?A few personal favorites

1. What did I like about…?

2. What didn't I like about …?

3 . What did I learn?

4. Who have I added value to today?

5. What can I do better tomorrow?

Step 3. Commit to questions specific to a situation for periodic reflection based on the event period. Schedule time as soon as possible after an event, meeting quarter to reflect.

Some possibilities

1. During this quarter, how effectively were we accomplishing our goals?

2. During this time, have I or we acted in the best interest of those we lead?

Step 4. Commit to the process of recording your reflections. The importance of noted reflections is that it cements and solidify learnings and actions for the future. This recording also provides feedback and possibilities for future learnings and actions. This also is a personal preference. I prefer writing repose to the questions above. A digital format or even a recording can be helpful as well. The format is up to you. Whatever works best for you to be committed to the process is the key.

Step Five. Commit to Intentional sustained daily and periodic reflection giving yourself some grace for slip-ups and starting over.

Step 6. Commit to passing it on to those you lead and the organization. Activities such as scheduling reflective periods after a meeting or event provide a model for those you lead and serve. Developing a reflection plan with those you lead in coaching sessions will reinforce this foundational habit.

.The leader who commits to a habit of intentional daily and periodic reflection will model for those they lead and beyond. An intentional practice of daily and periodic reflection is crucial to what Author James Clear refers to as an "Atomic Habit," a small daily practice that will, if practiced daily and intentionally will be beneficial in your daily leadership journey and developing your story with a 2022 focus.

The Leadership question for you then is,

?Are you committed to an intentional practice of reflection for a clear 2022 focus?

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