Thunder Bay - In the Eye of the Reconciliation Storm...
Sandi Boucher
Indigenous/Canadian Reconciliation Speaker/Trainer/Consultant #ICreateSafeSpaces
I have dedicated my life to building strong respectful bridges between mainstream and the Indigenous, on one side empowering my brothers and sisters to be all they were meant to be before the schools, before the judgement, before the parenting chain was broken. And on the other side, educating and enlightening mainstream so that together we can abandon the unhealthy and paternalistic relationships of the past.
I am most definitely an empowered Indigenous woman and I live in Thunder Bay by choice.
I repeat … I live in Thunder Bay by choice because I love this city which brings me to this post and that elephant in the room …
Is Thunder Bay the most racist city in Canada? Well, some here will tell you we are engaged in a neck-in-neck race to the title with Winnipeg. Personally, it is a definition I don’t need.
Is there horrific racism in this city? In my humble opinion (I can’t do subtle, but I most definitely do humble), yes. Yes, there is, and it is not rare. It happens daily within city limits. I will not dishonour my brothers and sisters who have lost their children to the rivers by denying that.
But I work daily with men and women, Indigenous and non-Indigenous who are utterly and completely beautiful. They are working tirelessly to make a difference, to BE the difference and they give me hope. They are Thunder Bay too.
And the mountains and the Giant, Kakabeka Falls and Ouimet Canyon are still here. They are Thunder Bay too.
So instead of defining Thunder Bay as the most racist city in Canada, I see Thunder Bay in a much different way. I see it as a city in the eye of the storm, a storm that is reconciliation and like any form of reconciliation, it is ugly and uncomfortable because that is what reconciliation is and I know you know what I mean!
How many of you are in a relationship? How many of you have a significant other?
How many of you have ever had a fight with that person?
How many of you have tried making up with that person?
Depending on your communication styles, the length of your relationship and how bad the transgression was, reconciliation may or may not have been a challenge.
You might approach them wanting to make up. They may not be ready to make up yet.
Then you might approach again a little later and this time they agree to talk but when they start talking, they are very harsh, obviously angry, and using words that have a better chance of continuing the argument than resolving it.
You may stick it out. You may walk away and come back later. You may walk away period. So might they.
If it’s a new relationship, you make up fast and get to the making up part quickly.
If it’s a longer relationship, it may or may not be more important to make up, but there is a good chance you now value the relationship more, considering the time invested.
And of course, how bad whatever they did was is DEFINITELY going to play into this.
That is reconciliation. It is uncomfortable. It can get heated. It involves hurt feelings and past actions that hurt people. It takes time and commitment, and it might take more than one attempt. THAT is reconciliation and that is what you are seeing in Thunder Bay.
Because the reality is in many cases Indigenous and non-Indigenous people aren’t talking anymore. We have been in a long-term abusive relationship with each other, and it hurt.
Often mainstream wants to talk. Often Indigenous isn’t ready to talk yet ESPECIALLY if mainstream uses a whole bunch of fifteen-dollar words as if they are still looking down on us like an abusive partner does.
Some Indigenous are ready to talk but they are filled with the anger that comes after someone is hurt. And if mainstream tells them they are not being appropriate using that language, we are now starting yet another fight.
But eventually the sides talk, eventually. Trying to find new ways to express themselves just like the couple after the fight. They want to work it out but not really sure how. They are frustrated and this all seems like DRAMA but if we want this relationship to work, we have to work through this … we have to reconcile.
In Thunder Bay, we are in the eye of the storm.
We are not sitting in the bleachers, pointing fingers and picking sides.
We are in the ring, talking and not talking, fighting and not fighting, under a national spotlight and I don’t believe it will end anytime soon but I do believe it will get better.
In the end, I honestly believe Thunder Bay will become the example of what the rest of the country needs to do because here in Thunder Bay we are reconciling, some faster than others but reconciling, nevertheless.
And what you see is the reality that Thunder Bay is a city and not everyone is on the same page … just like in any other city
- Some people here are still denying there is a problem.
- Some people here are busy listing off all they have already done to fix the problem (as if somehow that made things any better).
- Some people are saying it will never get better (which is an excuse to do nothing).
- And the rest of us are rolling up their sleeves and diving in so please don’t judge. In fact, I invite you to continue watching us, to learn from our pain so that those marginalized, racialized and Indigenous peoples in your neck of the woods can someday know reconciliation too.
Just keep in mind … storms do end and how fitting that this storm of reconciliation is happening here in this city, named and known for its storms.
This city is on a journey as we all are, as we come to terms with words like oppression, internalized oppression, privilege and power, words that by themselves increase the discomfort level of the room. We are unpacking the suitcase that was handed to us with all the misinformation and stereotypes intact and we are slowly one by one discarding what we don’t need and hanging on tight to what we do need.
We need patience.
We need to learn and practice self-care to do the work that needs to be done.
We need the calming of Lake Superior and the inspiration of Animki Wajiw (Thunder Mountain aka Mount McKay) to keep us moving forward.
We need the Seven Grandfather teachings (our equivalent to the 10 commandments) as much as anyone …
We need wisdom to know when to speak and when to just listen.
We need to love the spirit of the human in front of us, even when we do not understand their words, actions, or thoughts.
We need to respect each other, ourselves and Mother Earth.
We need to be brave enough to continue this journey, no matter how uncomfortable it gets.
We need to be honest and share when we do not understand.
We need to humble in knowing we are no better than any other and that this will not be accomplished alone.
We must know our truth, and share our truth, so that we can live that truth.
And we do and we are. We are here up to our necks in it and slowly we are beginning to see some light because here in Thunder Bay we are learning … each day we are learning.
We now realize that oppression means you don’t have career goals or dreams no matter how many times someone asks you “What do you want to be when you grow up?” or “What you want to be when you finish school?”
We realize that oppressed people don’t trust people they don’t know and especially those who look like the oppressor no matter how many times someone says that they should or that not trusting is unfair.
We understand that oppressed people are still being rewarded for forgetting who they are and becoming more like the oppressor because that just makes things “easier” to everyone BUT the oppressed person.
And that oppression is passed on without even uttering a word.
Here in Thunder Bay we are learning, as Dr Martin Luther King Jr. said, that there are three ways the human being reacts to oppression –
- Acquiescence – Giving up, accepting it will never get better, not bothering to have dreams, drinking and drugging the pain away.
- Violence – against those who oppress and against each other.
- Non-violent resistance – standing up, speaking up, daring to try to change things.
So please, the next time you watch the news and see a Chief has set up a road block or that another youth from a northern remote community has taken their life … know it is simply and sadly a reaction to oppression. One, the non-violent resistance of a Chief as he tries desperately to get someone to hear (because seriously no one blockades as a FIRST attempt at communication) and the other, the violent end of all hope for a youth that probably didn’t have any at all in the first place.
Please do not sit in the front row of privilege and say “But we are all equal. It is just silly to think that way” when you have no idea what it is like to sit in the back row.
And please speak up when someone else says the same.
And if someone asks you “Is Thunder Bay beautiful?” tell them it absolutely is! It is why my ancestors chose to live and love here long before Europe knew we existed, and long before the rows of privilege were created, and it is why the settlers choose to live here too.
And if they ask, “Is Thunder Bay racist?” tell them yes, yes, it is. Yes, it absolutely is.
But is there hope? I would dare to say here more than anywhere else because we are not in the bleachers. Here in Thunder Bay, we are fighting the good fight, fighting the fight of our lives – educating ourselves and others as we try to reconcile a past that did not serve us with a future that will.
So please, do not judge this beautiful city. Realize we are simply in the eye of a storm. Celebrate what we are going through and the learning curve it is. Shine a light to help us in the dark. Cheer us on. Replicate the work and learning we do … because here we are building solid bridges based in truth. Here we are not hiding from our national history or our present reality. We are facing it head on and I couldn’t be prouder to say …
I am Mishkopaganakwe and I call Thunder Bay home.
Former National Indian Education Counselor of the Year, United States of America
3 年You are truly conduit for enlightenment and good. A definite positive change agent. I am honored to have you as my friend Sandi.