Thriving in Your Career: From Salary Negotiations to Personal Growth

Welcome to the 29th edition of North Star Blueprints! In this weekly newsletter, we embark on a journey of personal and professional growth, offering observations, strategies, and inspiration to help you navigate life's challenges and reach new heights of success. This edition will provide a summary of the daily insights I posted throughout the week, packed with valuable tips, thought-provoking ideas, and actionable advice on how to proceed with salary negotiations, negotiating beyond your salary, mastering the pause, not letting arrogance stop you from learning and growing, and overcoming burnout while also reigniting your spark, in the hopes of helping you to unleash your better self.

September 2: Salary Negotiations

Another year has passed, you have more wants, needs, and responsibilities, your expenses have gone up, and prices around you are constantly increasing. The only thing that stayed constant is your salary, surely it should go up as well right? At least matching the rate of inflation? But that doesn’t seem to be the case. “It’s been a tough year… I’m sorry… We’ll try to raise it next year“ is all you get from your employer. Now what?

Time to ask yourself some very important questions - Do you enjoy what you do? Should you start looking for another job that will pay better? Should you stay with your current organization? What salary are you even looking for?

If your answer is to leave and find a different job, then you should pursue this path as quickly as possible. Staying any longer will only make you bitter, you will feel under appreciated for all the work you do, and the lack of compensation for that work. There is nothing wrong in finding a place that fits your needs better, but you are the one who must make it happen.

On the other hand, if you choose to stay, how do you go about negotiating a higher salary? I recently saw an interesting video by Simon Sinek that outlines a great approach. He highlights that the traditional method of asking for a raise — citing market averages and demanding a percentage increase — creates a binary choice for your boss, forcing a simple yes or no answer. Not very productive, since the answer is likely to be negative.

Instead, Sinek advocates for viewing your employment as an ongoing process rather than a singular event. By framing your request within the context of your long-term commitment and contributions, such as saying, “I’ve been here for X years and have demonstrated loyalty and value. Can we discuss a path to reach this salary?” you foster a collaborative conversation. This approach transforms the request into a constructive dialogue, enabling your boss to support your career development rather than merely responding to a demand. What it also does, is forcing your boss to have a stake in the raise as well, after all, you both have come up with a plan which means they will have to fulfill their part of the plan when you do yours. Make sure to capture it in writing, set achievable milestones and timelines, and share it with your boss, otherwise without tracking nothing will happen. This type of a conversation is also a great indicator to see whether your boss is even interested in your growth, otherwise the decision to leave is made simple.

It’s not an easy conversation to start, as it will likely take you far out of your comfort zone, but the pay off is significant. You will have increased your salary, your confidence, and your motivation to continue growing in your current company or somewhere else.

September 3: Negotiate Beyond Your Salary

When it comes to negotiating a job offer, many of us focus solely on salary, but there's often much more on the table. Compensation is multifaceted, and understanding the full spectrum of negotiable terms can significantly enhance your overall package. Compensation packages typically include a range of benefits beyond just the base salary.

Whether you're negotiating a new job offer or discussing benefits during a performance review, it's essential to recognize that there are often additional perks on the table. However, to maximize these opportunities, it’s also crucial to do your homework and understand what’s available to you so make sure you spend enough time learning about the company, industry, and the overall market.

These benefits can vary depending on your experience, role, and the company you’re dealing with. Here’s an overview of some items you might be able to negotiate beyond salary:

Signing Bonus: Some companies may offer a signing bonus, which is often negotiable, especially if they are unable to meet your salary expectations.

Vacation Time: While some companies have standard policies, there is often flexibility in negotiating additional vacation days, particularly if you have more experience.

Remote Work / Flexible Schedule: With the rise of remote work, negotiating the ability to work from home or a more flexible schedule has become increasingly common.

Professional Development: You can negotiate for the company to cover the costs of certifications, training, or educational courses that will help you grow in your role.

Relocation Assistance: If the job requires you to move, you may be able to negotiate a relocation package to cover moving expenses.

Equity / Stock Options: For some roles, particularly in startups, equity or stock options may be part of the compensation package and can often be negotiated.

Job Title / Role: Depending on your experience and the company’s structure, you might be able to negotiate a different job title or expanded responsibilities.

By broadening your focus beyond salary alone, you can secure a job offer that not only meets your financial needs but also supports your work-life balance, career growth, and long-term satisfaction.

September 4: Master the Pause

Another meeting is on the horizon, and you’re gearing up for that important presentation. Your mind races, and the pressure to keep the conversation flowing is high. You’re preparing to fill every moment with information, ensuring there’s no room for awkward silences. But in your rush to avoid these pauses, are you missing out on something powerful?

Imagine this: you’ve just delivered a key point, and instead of filling the air with more words, you pause. The room is quiet, and the audience leans in, digesting what you’ve just said. That silence you feared? It’s doing more work than your words ever could. Whether in conversations, negotiations, or presentations, pauses aren’t something to be avoided—they’re a tool to be embraced. So next time, don’t rush to fill the silence. Let it work for you.

For example, in a negotiation, a well-timed pause after a proposal can convey confidence and allow the other party to consider your offer more carefully. It can also encourage them to reveal more information or make concessions. Similarly, in conversations, a pause can signal that you're thoughtfully considering the other person's words, fostering a deeper connection and understanding. In presentations, as mentioned earlier, pauses can emphasize key points, giving the audience time to absorb the information and increasing the overall impact of your message.

Embracing silence and learning to control it, can make you a more effective communicator. Don't be afraid of pauses—they often say more than words ever could. Dom Barnard has done an excellent job summarizing some effective ways to use pauses, check it out here .

September 5: Don't Let Arrogance Stop You from Learning and Growing

Another profitable client, another milestone reached, and another outstanding deliverable, you find yourself in a positive cycle of success and growth. You’re feeling confident, and rightfully so — you’ve worked hard to get where you are. As your accomplishments stack up, so does your confidence. A quality that will serve you well along the journey, but also a quality that can very quickly develop into something more concerning – arrogance. There’s a thin line between confidence and arrogance… it’s called humility.

How do you continue to lead with confidence while staying grounded? How do you ensure that your success serves you, but also elevates your team? How do you channel your energy into charisma as opposed to repulsion?

Mastering the balance between confidence and humility is key to building lasting success, both in personal and professional settings. Confidence is essential in all we do — it drives us to take risks, make decisions, and advocate for ourselves. But without humility, it can alienate us, and create blind spots. Think of an individual who exudes confidence yet remains open to feedback and learning. They inspire trust and admiration, not because they always know the answers, but because they are willing to admit when they don’t.

It's very easy to fall into the trap of arrogance, any person who’s experienced success can attest to that. A reminder that works well for me is to embrace a "learn-it-all" mindset instead of a "know-it-all". It’s about being confident in my abilities, understanding my strengths and value, but also remembering to balance it with humbleness, and recognizing that growth comes from collaboration with others and continuous learning. As the famous quote by Socrates goes “the more I learn, the more I realize how much I don't know”.

September 6: Overcome Burnout and Reignite Your Spark

I spent the last few days reconnecting with a lot of people, now that everyone is back from their summer holidays. People across different industries, geographies, and ages. I noticed a very concerning trend - nearly every conversation led to rants about being burnt out. This might simply be attributed to post-vacation depression, or perhaps the realization that the summer and warm days are behind us… I suspect the weaker economy and the constant barrage of difficult news from around the world are not helping either. The above factors impact all of us, but beyond them, we all have our own personal stories and struggles as well, and they likely have the greater impact on how you feel.

Burnout can manifest in many ways, and recognizing it is the first step toward addressing it. If you find yourself feeling emotionally drained, physically exhausted, or mentally disconnected from your work, these are key signs that burnout might be creeping in. Other symptoms include a loss of motivation, decreased productivity, or even feeling cynical about your responsibilities. Often, burnout doesn’t come from the work itself, but from the overwhelming feeling of constantly having to keep up without proper rest or balance.

Take a moment to reflect on your own experience. Are you struggling to feel passionate about things that once excited you? Are you noticing that small tasks now feel monumental? If so, it might be time to step back and reassess. The first step to overcoming a burnout is acknowledging it. From there, you can start setting boundaries, asking for support, and taking time to recharge before it turns into a more serious issue. Recognizing the problem early can help you find ways to heal and regain control over your energy and mental health. Have a look at the graphic below, it’s a good visual to refer to as you’re assessing your situation.

Thank you for joining me on this journey of growth and discovery. I hope these insights illuminate your path forward as you pursue your aspirations with purpose and determination. See you in next week's edition!