Three Things I learned from Dad

I’ve seen a lot of posts recently on people stating that 2023 was “the absolute worst” and “the most challenging year they’ve yet experienced.” I share this sentiment. First and foremost, I lost my dad unexpectedly back in June. He was much more than a dad. He was my best friend, mentor, confidant, traveling companion, advisor, etc. I learned a lot from my dad over the years. If I were to write it all out, it would span multiple books. However, I think I can pinpoint 3 that had the biggest impact on my life and might be beneficial for others to hear.

1. Treat Others As You Would Want To Be Treated. This seems like a no-brainer, but how often do we slip? I know I do . . . often. I’ll give you an example: when I was a kid Dad and I were at the golf club waiting in line to order a meal. There was a member in front of us who was giving the service staff a hard time. I mean really letting them have it for something insignificant. Dad leans over to me and audibly, so the other guy can here, says to me, “if I ever catch you treating someone like that, I will smack the ever-loving &*%# out of you.” The other member, feeling a fool, tucked his tail and sped away. The impact my Dad had on other people’s lives was evident at his Celebration of Life. Not simply by the number of people, but the type of people. There were family and friends sure, but there were also employees of the golf club, old business partners he hadn’t seen in years, maintenance men, his dry cleaner, even the local gas station attendant. Dad treated each of these people, regardless of their standing in life, with kindness and respect.
2. You’re Only As Old As You Let Yourself Be. Dad was like a fine wine, he only got better with age. The man was an absolute animal in the gym. People in their 40s and 50s were blown away at how hard he worked. He took up sheep hunting when he was in his mid-50s. For those who don’t know, sheep hunting is arguably the most physically challenging hunt you can partake in. On one trip in particular, my dad and his guide were traversing a pretty precarious ledge. The guide turns to Dad and says, “just so you know Don, this is a no fall zone.” In other words, “you fall here and you ain’t gettin’ back up again.” For most folks in their 50s and 60s, the biggest thrill of their day is getting their Wordle in three guesses, and here my Dad is risking his life on a sheep hunt. To some extent, aging is a state of mind. Take care of yourself and you too may one day trek through the mountains of the Yukon.
3. Family First . . . No Matter What. Dad often told me that he probably could have had a lot more financial success, but that would have meant sacrificing time with us. This was a non-negotiable for him. The financial crisis of 2007-2008 hit his industry hard. During this time, we would have forgiven him for not being around as much. He had a business to run after all, and employees that relied on him. It got to a point where he was foregoing his own salary in order to pay his employees and keep the lights on. Despite the chaotic and challenging times, Dad was always around. He even attended those God-awful talent shows (I was terrible in them). This is kind of clichéd, but it’s worth repeating . . . as you reach the end of your time here what will you regret more (A) not spending more time at the office, or (B) not spending more time with your family?

I hope you (the reader) can take at least one of these lessons from Dad and apply it to your life. I can guarantee that you, your family, your friends, strangers on the street and society itself, will be better because you do.