Three: Surround yourself with doers.

[Preface] Defining Decade author Dr. Meg Jay writes in her book that twenty somethings develop forward thinking capabilities between the ages of twenty-one and twenty-five. Before then, the frontal lobe of a human being’s brain has not yet fully formed. This means human beings do not possess consequential thinking abilities until they are in their late twenties. The irony of this, Dr. Jay writes, is that our twenties are part of the most critical decade of our lives. 

During this period of time, our actions form the foundation upon which we lead our lives. It influences our potential to thrive or fall into a cycle of mediocrity. Fortunately, even when we’ve moved past our twenties and entered our thirties, there is still time to make the critical lifestyle changes that shape our future. In this blog series, I wanted to reflect on my personal experiences and share some of the key life lessons I’ve learned along the way.

Stay tuned on Tuesdays and Thursdays over the next few weeks for these postings. Whether you’re a twenty, a thirty, or a forty-something, I hope these insights give you food for thought and a chance to live your best life.

Surround yourself with doers.

Each human being that walks among us has a desire to fulfill their own destinies whether or not they coincide with ours. We are all given a single life and forced to play our hand the best way we know how. Because of this, every choice we make is heavily influenced by the thoughts, opinions, and experiences of those around us. Sometimes this works out favorably, sometimes it does not. Many people experience a sense of failure when success is apparent in those around them. So they take matters into their own hands. These are exactly the kind of people we must strive to avoid at all costs.

Whether they know it or not, people possess a power that can trigger strong, toxic emotions that eat away at one’s ambitions. The potency of this influence is especially pronounced in strong bonds: A parent to a child, a married couple, or close friends. It can be as simple as someone telling another, “you have no chance” or as toxic as a scenario where love once governed a relationship in which one party goes into a spiral and causes the other to fall into an emotional cycle they can’t seem to escape. 

It’s not always easy, but it’s an important lesson to learn never to feed the wolves. Negative emotions give power to those who cause them. Tune them out and you deny them this power. Give your attention to those that offer you the strength to carry on. Surround yourself with doers who share similar goals. By doing so, you subject yourself to the positive energy, motivation, and the role models you need in order to thrive. Remember, you will never be this young again. You get one life, you owe it to yourself to live the life you want. Do not make it a miserable one.

Ten Things to Learn While You're Young - Past Lessons:

Lesson One:Borrowed money is borrowed time.

Lesson Two: Invest in the things that get you closer to your dreams.

Disclaimer: Opinions expressed in this article are of the author and do not reflect the opinions of the author's employer.