The Three Practices for being a 'Decent' human.

A theme has been recurring in the Mindful Leadership sessions in the past few weeks of?Mindful Leadership.? The desire has been not only to find calm but also to find what it is to be a decent human.? The guidelines for how to be that when things are complicated can be confusing.

From my perspective there are three practices that can guide us.? These of course will not solve all obstacles in life but I think it is fair to say that they will take you far. Show:?Curiosity, Care and Clarity.? (You can add courage as well, but it is often a byproduct of the other three, hence not primary.)? These are the practices of the Adult.? They are the ways we engage not only with each other but with ourselves and life around us.

We are?curious:?we inquire, we seek to understand.? When we have a challenge, we are curious around our own contribution to the situation.? We ask questions.? The principle here is that the deeper we understand, the easier it is to love.

We?care: we bring tenderness to the moment, we acknowledge our own emotion and that of others in acceptance of what has arisen.? We seek to be of support while not abandoning our own needs.? We hold compassion in our hearts.

We bring?clarity:?around expectations, around needs, around what the next steps will be, around the relationship.? We seek the clarity through curiosity and care for ourselves and others.

Dear Body is of course a central part of this.? At times we have to establish calm before we can access care, curiosity or clarity.? The practice in the moment is body first but also investing in ensuring the body’s needs are taken care of.? Without that it is much harder to catch ourselves when we are not curious, caring nor clear.

The combination of Care and Curious opens us up to a wider perspective than the immediate or the pain or the limited perspective.? The combination of Curious and Clear can mean becoming hard on the issue and soft on the person.? The combination Clear and Care leads to healthy boundaries for the protection of the relationship. ?

I hope this little guide will be of use to you, and please share your thoughts and experiences.

If you are needing assistance with mindfulness, get in touch or start with our free mindfulness gifts >>