Three Golden Rules for Effective One-to-One Meetings.

One-on-one meetings can make or break team dynamics. Done right, they motivate and drive success. Done wrong, they're a waste of time. Here's how to fix them with just three steps:

1. Make It Their Meeting

Sounds clichéd right?

Here's the thing. You still initiate the meeting and define what 'A' looks like, but they control the conversation. Relinquishing control might feel risky and even take some encouraging, but it empowers your team. When they own the meeting, they’re more invested in the outcomes. So, step back and let them steer the ship. Follow their lead on raised topics and resist the urge to step in.

Your job is to:

• Allow/encourage them run the show.
• Guide them without taking over.
• Ensure they take responsibility for the outcomes.

2. Ask the Right Questions

Aligning on expectations is easy when you ask the right questions. Be consistent with your questions so there are no surprises. Here's a few questions I use in 1:1's:

• What’s been top of mind this last week?

This question positions it as their meeting. It empowers them, but more importantly, it gives you insight into their priorities and thought processes.

• What worked well, and what didn't?

This is a reflective question to learn lessons from, however, it also tells you their ability to recognize what matters.

• What are the biggest road blocks you face?

This offers insight into what is stopping them from moving forward but more importantly, it allows you the opportunity to challenge them for solutions. It's a great Segway for coaching the culture you want to have.

Often the same road blocks can come up week after week. Ask for a plan to solve and keep it on the agenda until resolved.

• Where are you at with your goals?

Well written OKR's or SMART goals will be clearly measurable. Ask for factual data. "Good or Ok" is not measurable. Hold them accountable and manage expectations.

Goals achieved should be celebrated - in private or public depends on the person. Be sensitive.

• How are you getting on with your team and colleagues?

Your bottom line is the sum of all of us. Catching division early and patching it up is crucial to collaboration. Coach your team to develop their immediate network themselves.

• What book are you reading at the moment or what work are you doing to develop yourself?

"A players" want to be better everyday. This question positions your expectation and encourages personal development. You'll learn how they think about personal development. It's an opportunity to suggest relevant books to read or courses that will make them better.

By asking the right questions, you align expectations, gain valuable insights, and ensure your team members are on the right track. This method not only empowers them but also gives you the information you need to lead effectively.

3. Stay Consistent and Supportive

Consistency builds trust and reliability. Regularly scheduled one-on-ones show that you prioritize these meetings and value your team members’ time.

• Regularity:

Weekly, bi-weekly, or monthly. Whatever works for your team member best - just be consistent.

• Show Up Prepared:

Prep and punctuality matter. It shows you care and they matter. Don't make a habit of cancelling.

• Offer Support:

Throughout the conversation, look for opportunities to remove obstacles and provide the resources your team members need to succeed.

Always end the meeting by asking directly, “What else do you need to win?” This leaves your team member with a final message that you are there to help and they're not alone.

• Maintain Relationships Outside of Your 1:1's

One-to-Ones are not a substitute for a healthy, genuine relationship. Interactions outside of 1:1's offer the opportunity for real-time coaching and insight. Being present for those moments shows real solidarity and care.

Finally, keep it straightforward and no-BS. People respect honesty.