How to Tell Your Career Story if You are Staying, Leaving or Undecided About Your Job

Because I’m a career coach, people often ask me to pull simple and convincing work stories from the messy narratives of their professional lives.

“Messy narrative” is the phrase I use, but often they will use transportation metaphors like “train wreck” or “a car that has run out of gas in the middle of nowhere” or “a ship sailing without navigational support”.?

Don’t envy me my colorful conversations. Rather, spend that time changing what’s undermining your wellbeing. As each person shares their struggle I reassure them with this: Don’t underestimate how chaotic many of our career trajectories actually are. Even people with deep networks can struggle with what they say to their connections about their work. And in one way or another, most of us do think of our careers as train wrecks, some of the time.?

What’s important, when it comes to your career story, is for you to take control. It’s lucky for you that I’m a specialist at this kind of thing.?

I tell people to consider Snow White. It could be said of her that she was a strange lady cast out by her family who ended up living as the only woman with nine strange men, and was eventually struck down by a weakness for eating fruit offered by elderly strangers, or it might be said that she left home at an early age to make her way in the world and was eventually recognized as the fairest in the land, who ultimately became the queen. It’s a question of where she chose to place the emphasis — and whether she defines who she is or has others do it for her.

The majority of people are unhappy in their jobs, and many of us just fell into what we do for a living. There’s no shame in feeling that way. In fact, owning up to being dissatisfied at work can be the first step in changing our situation for the better. I do believe that we all have a right to expect to be fulfilled at work.

You may have been working for decades, but you certainly don’t have to include all the bad stuff when you tell your career story in your elevator pitch. People need a convincing story to network effectively, to land another job, or to progress effectively within their current role. But unless you’re a master storyteller adept at devastating last-minute plot-twists, it’s unlikely that your most effective work story will include the words “fell into this”, “unhappy” or “by accident.”

Of course, you can save those work stories for the bar, therapy or a few hours into the conversation!?

People need a work story in three “elevator pitch” situations in their life. Which of these describes yours?

• "I don't know what I want to do next."
• “I do know what I want to do next.”
• “I’m pretty fulfilled with what I’m doing now.”?

While you’re thinking about that, I’m going to give you some preliminary advice:

• Be Pithy— Use your words, but don’t use all your words. You are better served by not sharing every job or accomplishment because no one wants to hear that laundry list. Use a first-date approach, and allow the other person to be curious enough to ask questions.?
• Use Authentic Language—One of the great misperceptions of all times is that using industry jargon and consulting language will make you sound more impressive. It bores people. They’ve heard it all before. Or the jargon will go over their head, and they’ll figure that they can’t help you. So: Use your own, authentic language. Stating complex terms or concepts simply can be a great sign of mastery and get the jaded listener to perk up.
• Say What is True—If you try to take credit for other people’s work, you can bet it will be shot down in flames by anyone who knows better. Don’t overstate your accomplishments and if anything, err on the side of caution, here.?

So, did you decide which story you need to tell, yet? Don’t worry if you’re torn. It can be tough. In fact, you might want to spend some time reflecting. If you do feel like you know, though, please, continue…

Whichever story you are telling, you need to be able to do it in around four sentences:

• In the first sentence, people share what they have been doing recently, and for how long. Your goal is to build some credibility.?
• In the second sentence, say something positive about your career so far. It could be an achievement you’re proud of, something you like about your work, or something memorable or interesting.?
• In the third sentence, share your current situation, including why you’re interested in making a transition, if that’s where you are.?
• In the fourth sentence, share what you’re doing about your current situation, including what actions you’re taking, and how others might help.?

So, let’s give it a try, shall we?

Story 1: “I don’t know what I want to do next.”

Most people don’t really know what they want to do next. However, they don’t want to admit that truth to themselves or others. They feel like they should know already, and instead, they come out with a muddled and inexact request that gets across to smart people just how confused they are. We work with them to develop a story or pitch that gets across that they are in an open exploration mode.?

One of my most interesting new clients is a professional snowboarder. Here’s how we worked to tell his story. Remember the four-sentence structure? Here goes…

• For the last 20 years, I’ve been one of the most accomplished riders on the professional snowboarding tour.?
• As a professional rider I’ve won multiple gold medals and have been able to put on events around the world, bringing groups of riders to perform for the military and sick children, and to be the point person on logistics for those events.?
• I’m in the process of retiring, and I want to use my drive and ability to focus to be the best in my next job.?
• I’m having conversations across the spectrum of possible careers, and I’m particularly interested in speaking with people who are able to work autonomously and have achieved great success in their career in fields where traditional education may matter less.

You’ll notice that this person has no idea what they want to do next, but they’ve followed the simple work story structure, and it still makes a strong & memorable case for multiple possibilities. Remember you are going to be remembered succinctly as the guy or gal who did ___________. Consider yourself what those words might be. For example, and these are all true:

• The mortician and international aid worker who wanted to...
• The guy who spoke six languages fluently and…?
• The person who ran that amazing podcast on X that…

Try to stick the landing, and consider how they may ‘repitch’ you to a colleague if requested.?

What’s best about the story you tell when you don’t know what you want to do next is, you give people a lot of different ways they might be able to respond to you. It’s also good that you’re not pretending you know what you want to do next when you don’t, because that way, you don’t annoy your network by asking for something specific, when you don’t actually know what it is you want. Introductions rely on social capital that is best not squandered.?

Story two: “I do know what I want to do next.”

I’ll often work with someone through the earlier story and then work to figure out what would be the best work to pursue next. Once we have clarity on that, it is time to revisit the exploratory story and make a compelling case for a specific goal.

Once again, remember your four-sentence structure. What’s different about this story is, you’ll be using language and phrasing that indicates that you have made a choice and highlights aspects of your prior work that creates a more seamless narrative indicating that you are suited for such work. This will trigger others to be more responsive to you.

In my experience there is a liberation that people feel when their story aligns with who they are. Most people have never felt it, before. We all deserve to feel like we understand who we are, professionally, and are capable of sharing that with those we know. This is how you really engage your network. Where people lose their network is when they keep making vastly different requests that get across how confused they are, while putting up a front of certainty.

Let’s use the example of someone in a given field, interested in moving to a specific city for family reasons.?

• For the past decade, I’ve grown sales at several travel start-ups on the West Coast including ___________.
• I’ve routinely exceeded my targets, and been promoted for my ability to learn quickly and aptitude at taking a complex product and selling it to clients with very different event needs.?
• For family reasons, I now plan to move to New York, and am seeking opportunities to use my blend of skills at start-ups of all kinds where my event marketing approach might be a fit.?
• I don't need? a job immediately, but I wonder if you know of anyone working at an interesting organization that I should consider??

You will note that in neither of the two stories, so far, have we mentioned your needing a job. Because right now, what you need is a meeting. It’s not a job. A meeting, a conversation to understand them, their work, and its environment, is what matters. A conversation hopefully makes them a supporter, if not a champion of your candidacy. Furthermore, if a job exists, and they like you and see the fit, they will bring it up. If they don't, and you see it elsewhere, you can always reach out with your intention to apply and make the request to use their name or ask that they flag you in whatever internal process or system exists.?

Story three: “I’m pretty fulfilled with what I’m doing now.”

I really hope this is you, This, of course, is the most fun story to tell. Of course, just because you’re happy where you are, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be open to various opportunities about what you’ll choose to mention as your need. Whether it is building your brand or network, adding or honing a skill or serving on a board, consider both what you aspire to and why. Still, remember that four-sentence structure.?

• For the last three years I’ve been running the radiology department at a large hospital in Chicago.?
• We’ve exceeded expectations as a unit and hospital leadership has praised my efforts, particularly to retain and develop junior staff.
• I’ve been thinking more about building my brand by sharing my talent development strategies.
• Do you know of places you recommend that do a good job in developing public speaking skills, or places that would welcome such a presentation?

People often fall into the trap of waiting until they realize that they are unhappy before they have to create either of the first two directed stories where ultimately, new work is the point. This final story is about making a consistent investment in your development as a professional. I hope you think you are worth it.

Remember: You’re a complex person, and that’s okay. But unless you work hard to make your story straightforward, then most people who might be able to help you with your career won’t begin to know how they might do so. Once your work story is all set, you can start fishing with it, and hopefully, it will help you bring in the catch you yearn to land.?

—Russ Finkelstein?is the opposite of your High School Guidance Counselor.?A career coach, social entrepreneur, and advisor to founders, he is currently the Director of Coaching with the Roddenberry Fellowship, Coach-in-Residence with StartingBloc Fellowship, and a Co-Founder of Title8 an Immigration Legal Marketplace. He was a founder of the noted careers website Idealist.org and writes a weekly career column for the Washington Post.