The Three Contracts Framework
Paul Agostinelli
Professional Coach | Zen Teacher | Empowering High Achievers to Navigate Transition, Achieve Balance, and Find True Fulfillment with Zen
Ride the "tricycle" of your life
Today I want to offer my Three Contracts framework for your consideration. When I began developing this framework ten years ago, many light bulbs went off for me. I realized where I had been unconsciously acting out, and where I needed to choose my commitments.
Whenever I made progress on my discernment, the universe seemed to meet me there. When I got clear on the partner I wanted, she appeared. When I got clear on the work I wanted to do, opportunities appeared. When I was ready for a certain kind of teacher, they appeared.
I have been using this framework explicitly with coaching clients for the last five years. I have several coaching spots opening now. If you would like to explore working with me, write me for a free Discovery Session. We’ll spend 30-minutes and see if there is a fit. I am working in flexible models of frequency, rate and duration. If there is a good fit, we’ll make it work.
The Three Contracts Framework
Every human being has inner contracts in the areas of:?
Conscious contracts are expressed?as commitments?or vows. They are generative, liberating and empowering. Unconscious commitments?manifest as false?beliefs, fixed ideas, limiting stories, and habitual patterns of behavior and feeling. (They may be held in the nervous system as trauma.) These karmic hindrances can lead to depression, malaise, confusion, diminishment?of life force, ill health, and even feelings of despair or being?trapped.
At different seasons of our life, it is usually necessary for one of the contracts to be primary, with the other two being secondary or subordinate.?
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I think of the contracts as the wheels of a tricycle. Each wheel needs to be fundamentally sound by itself, it needs to be in alignment?with the overall vehicle (your life), and you need to understand which is the primary (front) wheel, which will guide your major decisions.?
I find this metaphor to much more descriptive and valuable with respect to what we often term "work-life balance". Work and "life" are not balls we are juggling, or things we are holding.
They are the very action of our life.
Major?problems arise when:
Last week, I had a coaching session with a longtime client who had the “aha” moment when he recognized that he could re-write his contract with Work, based on changes in his family. He had been angstful for months about his relationship with his general partners. He knew he needed to “let it go” and let them be their dysfunctional, narcissistic selves. But he couldn’t find his way to doing so. When he recognized his commitment to Work could be completely overhauled because he had in fact fulfilled the commitments he had made when he founded his company, a huge grin came on his face, and he whooped in liberation.
Getting clear on your contracts will bring you a grin and a whoop.
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Professional Coach | Zen Teacher | Empowering High Achievers to Navigate Transition, Achieve Balance, and Find True Fulfillment with Zen
4 个月Thanks Dane Jacka. I love that expression!
Providing Transformative Experiences for Teams and Individuals | Long Lasting Clarity, Well-being and Performance | Mindful Strategy Consulting | MBA CMT-P | Founder at pauseful
4 个月I love this framework! I can see how this a deeper exploration of true mindfulness i.e. coming into a purposeful and healthy relationship with all experience including the beliefs which we hold.