The Three Choices : Path to finding your purpose

Over the course of the last few years, I have been profoundly impacted by my readings on stoicism, Siddhartha, the way of life, the purpose of one’s living, and the universe in general. It has been more like a journey inwards than a journey outwards. Lonesome peaceful nights have been filled with deep thoughts about the nature of things and the harmonious balance of all that we see around us. I have been filled with dilemmas and thoughts of trying to make sense of life, its purpose, and our reason for existence.

I have also been bogged down by questions such as what is the need for consciousness in this general system of life?

Thoughts have come and left my mind speechless for hours.

I recently read somewhere that all a person’s life is, all that he/or she amounts to is usually forgotten in 3 generations at most. Whatever you are today, or will be, with maximum probability, will be remembered by your next 2 generations and then people are barely talked about in the immediate family circles. What are we doing then and for what?

This led me into a rabbit hole of finding one’s purpose and has brought me on the brink of three choices. These are absolute personal thoughts and not to be taken as a guiding light for one’s way of life. All I wish to do by sharing this is to ignite a spark in your mind, which may someday become a fire and enable you to find yourself and make the choice out of the three I am about to present to you.

The three choices

A person is presented with three choices in their life. These can also be viewed as the paths one chooses to find the purpose of their life or give meaning to it.

1. The Ragers

This is the kind of life where a man/woman gives almost everything s/he has for the pursuit of progress. The progress can be in many directions, personal wealth creation, knowledge or whatever is one’s desire.

A person following a raging life always has a singular mindset and their utmost full attention to?living the rage. They are consumed by the rage. They devote their time, energy, and capital to the rage. Family / Love / Health everything usually comes secondary.

There are only two outcomes of rage

a) A raging victory

b) A raging loss

Many successful examples of great people have been seen associated with the raging lifestyle. They?give up everything that makes us human?for their pursuit of greatness and fulfilment of their desires. But know that for?every 1 raging victory, there are also 100 raging losses.?The probability to win during a rage is the highest, but the will to carry on the rage dwindles due to the extremely low everyday happiness quotient. People only remember the raging victories and that too spectacularly. No one remembers the raging losses. Even if they do, it would not be in a positive light.

Examples: Mahatma Gandhi, Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, Gautam Buddha, Isaac Newton, Albert Einstein and many more.

HUSTLE QUOTIENT: 10

EVERYDAY HAPPINESS QUOTIENT: 4

FULFILMENT QUOTIENT: 10

INDIVIDUAL IMPACT ON THE WORLD: 10

2. The Balancers

The balancers are your average joe. They balance their work and personal life. They live in utter harmony with their hustle and family life.

In many cases post a few years of work, the balancers get into?an autopilot mode where they continue to spend 8–10 hours daily in BAU?( business as usual ) and spend the other part of their day loving caring and in the lap of affection with their families.

Their primary concern in life is the well-being of their family and how they can provide for them, this also may be a common motivator although not primary as seen in moderates ( the next category ).

They give the?most importance to family values, traditions, and culture.

These can also take the form of toxic relationships centred around their idea of stature in the family and cultural traditions. Examples are?evident in modern-day patriarchy or matriarchy.

Children born to the balancers also have a high probability of becoming future balancers.

These are the hands of the growth and economic engine of the world.

When their work-life tries to interfere with their personal life, they rebel in the form of unions or quit the workplace altogether to find a better fit.

HUSTLE QUOTIENT: 4

HAPPINESS QUOTIENT: 8

FULFILMENT QUOTIENT: 8

INDIVIDUAL IMPACT ON THE WORLD: 2

3. The Flippers

These are the kind of people who are Ragers in the initial phase of life, reach their income to a point where all their desires ( including personal, professional, and family ) can be taken care of month on month and?then flip to the side of the balancers post reaching that minimum “wants” state.?Their minimum want state also comes down in quantity as they age and will power to hustle is lost.

The flippers in all probability face issues with their personal life when they make the switch to the side of the balancer. The reason is neglecting their personal life in the pursuit of greatness in the?initial days leads to a lack of formation of meaningful connections in their personal life?as they are ageing and a sudden switch to the other side doesn't make the blood ties recover.

They give birth to either obedient children or children who are rebels and do not wish to do anything with their family money and go their own way since they have grown up seeing and feeling neglected by their parents.

Obedient children under the flippers usually?grow up under tremendous stress and feel incompetent since they always compare themselves to the achievements of their parents?and?feel inadequate.?If the flippers are unable to take time as a variable in the journey of their children and appreciate different KPI ( key performance indicators ) of quality of life at different phases, it usually leads to clashes in the family or obedient children with massive confidence issues, the baggage of the trauma caused by conflicts or mental health problems.

With respect to life partners, they usually end up losing them during their hustle phase as ragers and have to re-form new connections with other partners when they make the switch.

HUSTLE QUOTIENT: 6

HAPPINESS QUOTIENT: 6

FULFILMENT QUOTIENT: 6

INDIVIDUAL IMPACT ON THE WORLD: 5

POST NOTE

In this journey to finding your purpose, I would love to leave you all with a thought that may help give perspective. Know that all the carbon-based life, you, your dog, your family and all wildlife, flora, and fauna of any kind have been built by factories of the universe and stars. We have literally been forged by the carbon that was manufactured in the heart of dying stars. Heavy metals are only formed there. As we look further back in time with our telescopes ( light travelling from distant stars shows us how the universe was back then since light has taken that amount of time to reach us ) we realise that there were no heavy metals, only hydrogen, helium and some parts of lithium. The natural state of the universe is to move from order to chaos. As that happens we are blobs of atoms / heavy metals joined together which can dream, think and understand before everything disintegrates in full chaos. There are 2 trillion galaxies, with 200 billion stars each, and our milky way itself has 2 billion earth-like planets.?We are, after all, clusters of atoms in the form of thinking apes biding time on a pale blue dot.