Threading Visualization into Confidence
Ah, thread a needle. I meditate for a moment on my mother when she was in her 60s. My mother, as a tailor, spent 40 years hemming my family’s pants and creating our designer dresses besides other customer’s requests for custom clothing. Image my mother gripping steadily a fine needle, fitting thread through the eye of the needle, the clinking of scissors, listening to the rattling of the sewing machine paddle. My mom had a good deal of dexterity that I did not inherit. She never taught me how to sew, and I seldom tried to excel in the fashion world. My sister and I loved the special flower prints that everyone admired. They asked,”where did we get the clothing? I love it. They are beautiful in you.”
In my mother’s late 70s, after a couple of attempts, she eventually intruded on my reading time to assist her to grip the needle with thread. It requires a keen eagle vision. Time lags, she rarely does the sewing any more because the work of sewing is time consuming and labor demanding. The most crucial thing is the ability to see the stitches in details and the eye of the needle in miniature.
Now picture myself wedged into several working pants that are too long. I realized the disadvantage of my mother not being around me since I have grown to become a mother myself. My hope dwells, “maybe buying new pants would be a quick fix.” I was intimidated by my mother’s talent.
“Is there any magic that could make the length of the pants shrink 1.5 inches? What if the pants are soaked in hot water?” I wondered. I grew weary and wanted to escape the challenge and chore of filling a needle with thread. It was the main course I struggle even with reading glasses.
As I listened to an inspirational Christian podcast from Pastor Charles Stanley, I changed my reluctant attitude and resolved to alternate the pants. Looking at the pants sitting in a corner for a month, I wished the pants would either dodge away from the kitchen or duck under a cabinet so I would forget about their unwelcome presence. Amazingly, I sensed they were staring at me, it is better to treat them like a house cat. My inner voice started to whisper,”I have no nice pants to wear for months. How about hemming the pants?”
As the talks on the podcast flowed and pumped with encouragement, my fingers fit through the thread without spectacles. Six times I wholeheartedly tried to insert the thread through the needle. The inner voice said,”I think I can. I think I can. It is surprisingly easy.” Without reading glasses, it looks like impossible. With the visualization of my mother’s dexterity, it looks like possible. As I pushed through the thread through the tiny slot in needle, I pulled the other end. An unspoken confidence filled the whole room as blooming season starts for spring.
Visualization is the way to confidence. I reflected my childhood education with lack of confidence. My father did not want me to go to college; I was taught that daughters were worth less than a penny.
- A basketball coach uses positive visualization in basketball to be successful:Pick any shot basketball drill:Bend your knees; press of your toes.
- Have players close their eyes to perform the shot or drill. Follow through with your shooting arm.
- Mental training over an imaginary ball is a powerful weapon: see the ball go in in your mind’s eye.
- You need to spend time physically practicing.
- It is a useful technique to seek calmness on what you want to be good at.
We have to direct our emotion. WSJ writes about our attitude toward vacations and weekends. People feel exhausted on the weekend and holidays. On Monday, it is always hard to go back to work. One method of feeling energized is to set our mind on vacation mode. Everyday is a vacation even “staycation.”
I realized why checking myself in the mirror and smiling can tune in positive attitude. Learning how to ride a bicycle requires some confidence in visualization. It is profound. Basketball coaches teach their players to score by simply thinking of tossing the ball in the target without physically playing the ball.
The 4 Hour-Work Day author and podcaster, Tim Farris also emphasizes the importance of choosing the right friends. He regularly evaluates his surroundings to make adjustment for his confidence by maintaining worthy friends. He eschews bad influence from negativeness of wrong friends. “Be selective to your surroundings,”Tim comments.
As our emotions can be saturated with wrong influence by friends, noises and our inner voices. It can create a hinderance to achievements. We become who our friends are. Therefore, threading visualization into confidence and selecting right friends with wholehearted positive attitudes can promote our wellbeing.
How female guppies select mates is interesting. As it turns out, female guppies have a genetic preference for bright-orange males. But when Dugatkin arranged for some females to observe other females choosing dull-colored males, the observing females also selected the dull males. Surprisingly, in many instances female observers overruled their instincts and chose instead to imitate other females.
Parents should be vigilant and spiritually attentive to spontaneously see who their friends are. Adopting a new perspective internally, we can reveal internal contradictions between our behaviors, values and goals.
Granted, even sewing those pants still held a certain appeal. I embark on my imagination of “I think I can” on reframing my daily self-talks. Be selective with your close friends so your future doesn’t have to be.