For those times when you've drifted and don't know how to get back to God

My dear warrior,

Sometimes we get a little off-track in our walk with God. Or quite a lot. Distractions come our way, the noise of the world fills our heads, and we don't take the time to listen to God speaking to us. We lack self-discipline and become generally unintentional in our walk with God. Black Friday and Christmas sales demand our attention as we prep for the holidays, and we get caught up in the frenzy of life. Then (in our increasingly miserable stupor) one day we wake up and realize we haven't had a meaningful conversation with God all week.

Beloved, busyness is the enemy of the spirit (among other things. It certainly isn't the only thing). In my own struggles this month, I realized that I had allowed myself to drift. I had been so busy, overworked and stressed that I had gone from leaning on, trusting in and relying on God at every moment, to suddenly finding myself in unfamiliar territory that felt far removed from God. I felt like I didn't know how to get back to Him. (Have you ever realized how silly that idea is? It's like not having talked to your best in a week and forgetting how to pick up the phone and call, or just going over to see them.) In feeling disconnected from God, I realized I did not feel even remotely like myself. If you know me (or have gleaned anything about me from my writing), you'll know that I'm an intense, fast-paced, detail-oriented, passionate, happy, excited, driven little ball of energy. This month I was everything but that. I was stressed, depressed, frustrated and felt purposeless because I had let busyness get the best of me. I allowed the noise and distractions to consume me and take me away from the joy of my relationship with God. The joy of discipline in my walk had disappeared and I was wandering aimlessly. It was like walking around confused in the dark, when you wake up and don't know where you are. 

I was so relieved when I finally got some free time to decompress and listen to one of my mentors. He said that there are nine different things that cause us to drift in our walk with God. I found myself guilty of a few of them. These points are:

1. devaluing spiritual things; (scoffing at the prophetic, discounting miracles, or acting like God no longer speaks to us. As if He wrote a book and lost His voice!)
2. busyness, noise, and distractions
3. lack of persistence and self-discipline; being indifferent
4. guilt
5. an unrepentant heart; lack of humility and lack of a teachable spirit; a hard heart. 
6. lack of obedience; not wanting to take responsibility for your personal walk with God
7. lack of a value system
8. doubt; a lack of understanding of how God speaks 
9. fear - which is more faith in the enemy's ability to trip you up than faith that God will bless you and keep you. 

If you're finding yourself feeling "off", stressed, depressed or purposeless; if you don't know what's wrong in your life; if you feel like you've been in a haze or are going through one of the toughest seasons in your life, then let me encourage you: take heart, all is not lost. Your circumstances are not beyond what God can handle. He is greater than any circumstance, difficulty or confusion, and no matter how far you've wandered, you can be back in His arms in an instant. He may not magically fix your problems (He is not a genie and should not be treated as such. He longs for relationship with you; He is not looking just to be used by you), but I promise you that He does want to use your circumstances to demonstrate who He is and wants to be for you. As Graham Cooke states so beautifully, your difficulties exist so that God can be something for you that He never could have been at any other time. They exist so God can demonstrate His goodness, kindness, strength, mercy, power and glory in your life. It is when things are most difficult that we look to God because we know we need Him, and it is in those times that He can show Himself powerful in your life. Now that's good news.

So if you're wandering aimlessly, and you find yourself guilty of any of those nine points, do not delay. Repent and run directly into His arms like David did. There's no penance to pay, no need to "work" your way back to Him. Grace covers you so you can come directly back into His presence. That's what He longs for! So Run into His arms, let Him put things right and take the weight off your shoulders. Even if your circumstances don't change, let Him use those circumstances so you can know Him like you never have before, and like you would not have if not for your situation.

Stop drifting, and let Him carry you. No matter what it is, I promise you that He is good. No matter your circumstances, no matter how you feel, no matter where you are in life, He is good. He is relentlessly kind. He is unchanging, and will always be good and kind. 

Live in the battleground,

Warrior Beloved

?Michèle Aimée, 2016

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