Thinking about your Thinking *

Choosing how we show up at work each and every day requires enormous cognitive energy, and persistent shifts of our awareness to notice the impact we are having on others.?

For many of us we spend a lot of energy in rumination about what others might think of us, or a situation, we imagine what is behind their behaviours, or what ‘they should’ be doing differently. It can feel exhausting, and it is.?

This kind of thinking fuels stress for us, and a sense of helplessness – that things would be better if other people would just do things differently – and it doesn’t grow or stretch our confidence - for some of us it keeps us very much stuck.??

At this point in the year, especially as we head towards the peak workload period for so many of us around EOFY, we can easily get caught in this type of thinking. We can trick ourselves into believing that this type of thinking is reflection, that we are learning about the situation through this thinking. But actually, if the focus of our thinking is external, we are not facilitating our own learning and growth. We are essentially engaging in a version of wishful thinking.??

So, if you are feeling stuck, or overwhelmed at this point in the year, I want to invite you to think about where your thinking is at. Are you engaging in active self-reflection or external-focused thinking? When we engage in active self-reflection, the kind that really grows us as leaders, we are thinking to deepen our understanding of ourselves. We are looking to reflect on the challenges that we are facing – what we can learn about ourselves, and our impact on others, through reflecting on our own thinking and feeling in those challenging moments.??

• What might I do differently here??
• What can I do to help this situation???
• What can I do to grow through this experience??

Through noticing the thinking and behaviours that support us to be ‘confident enough’ to try something new, we can choose how we show up in challenging moments, and then reflect to learn what our impact was on others in that scenario. I invite you through this busy period to experiment with the smallest reflective practise that might support you to intentionally practise using your confidence toolkit.??

It might be journalling as we spoke about at the beginning of the year, or it might be:?

• Monthly check-In with your Leader, where you discuss: What you have tried to do differently this month. What are you learning from that?? What might you try next month??
• Weekly message with a peer on LinkedIn: Share something I did that was challenging this week, and what I learned about myself through that.
• Collating experiences through the year to prepare for a future interview – with each challenge capturing: What happened?? What did I do that helped, or not, in this situation?? What did I learn from that??

Each time we pause for just a moment and turn inwards to consider our own thoughts, actions and impact on others, we get a little more curious. We tap into deeper, more sustainable motivation around how we can contribute to the work that matters most for us. We get a little braver in seeking feedback that will help us learn more about ourselves. And we build the practise of stepping up to that which we don’t feel confident to do, yet.??

So as you head towards mid-2024, I invite you to take a moment to think about what you would like to build your confidence to step up to over the next few months – maybe speaking up in meetings, tackling a difficult conversation or applying for that next level role.?

• What is the first small step you could take to prepare yourself to do that thing?? Maybe ask someone to seek your opinion in that meeting. Maybe capture your thoughts to feel well prepared for that difficult conversation,? or start practising your responses to potential interview questions?
• What do you know might get in the way for you to stop you from giving that thing a first try?? What might you do to support yourself through that block??
• How might you celebrate your progress in July if you step up bravely and try something new before then??

If you are ready to step up to that new role and are looking for a confidence boost – our Interview Confidently online short course will give you a structured framework to feel ready. And if you are looking to dive more deeply at the end of this financial year to reflect on the impact you have created, our EOY reflection will give you the framework to make that dive. And, as always, if you are ready for some closer support to reflect, grow and step up as a leader, or help your team make that shift forwards, please do reach out , I would love to explore how I might help.??

The world needs us to step up and take on the challenges of the moment. Each time you grow your skills, you do something hard, and you grow your confidence, you can contribute more to the work that matters most. Reflecting on how to best support yourself to create that growth is a practise that takes a little of your attention - but is a far better use of your energy than ruminating on others. Think about how you can help through your action, rather than how they might change.?

I promise you will feel more empowered, more confident and be more valuable for the work that you care about.?

Amy

Amy in Person - 2 Day Intensive Workshop

Invest in your leadership development this year through a 2-day intensive in-person experience focused on developing your practical tools, mindsets and habits that will build your confidence for leading your team, influencing upwards and growing your career.?

For more information, or to book, click here or in the picture below .

Article: Leaders are a Work in Progress

As humans we are all works in progress.

With every experience we have in life our brains are changing and adapting. I believe that Leadership as a skillset and capacity is one that is never actually “achieved”. We continuously learn and improve as leaders; around every corner lies the next leadership challenge that pushes us differently, stretches different skills and challenges our assumptions in different ways.? Read more.

Video: Self Management - Are you walking the talk?

"To lead others well we must start with self-reflection. Through growing our self-awareness around our thinking, behaviours and impact as leaders we can then make intentional choices around our self-management – what do we do with our nerves, how do we cope with the overwhelm, how do we actively learn from our great and our rubbish moments as leaders?"

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* This newsletter was sent to subscribers on our website in June 2024. If you would like to receive these earlier in future, please click here and look for the Newsletter Signup at the top of the page. - Team Amy?