Things to Ponder

Things to Ponder

July 28, 2020

I hope these words find you in good health, both physically and mentally. We have really been put through the wringer this year haven’t we? But we are tough, we humans can handle much more than we often believe. The question is, how will we handle ourselves in this crazy mixed up and far too separated society? It is so easy to pay undo attention to all the things that are going wrong, and far too easy to see only the things that are different in others. This is because we all have a negativity bias, yes all of us. Our brain is built for survival and that used to mean we had to be quick to notice if that thing moving in the bushes was something to run away from, kill and eat, or our new mate. And we had to know it very quickly. Today, we do not have such issues, but our brains still do their thing. Particularly when we are perceiving our environment as a hazardous place. This makes it far too easy for us to very quickly decide that someone is different than us and therefore dangerous to us. While this is a very natural thing for our brains to do, it is not necessarily the best thing for our well-being. We need each other and we need to be in societies that can live and work together in harmony.

So, what to do? One thing that we can benefit from is this simple exercise. To help us put a little more cognitive power toward what went right. Each day we can write or share with a loved one three things that went right today. This simple exercise helps us to remember that things do go right, even as things go wrong. Our brains won’t go there automatically until we teach them to do so. After a week or two you may find yourself naturally paying more attention to all those positive inputs that used to just slip by. That barista that remembers your name and your daily order, the gal at the front desk that smiles and says good morning EVERY day, the nice gentleman that let you pull into the parking spot, and so on. We won’t stop noticing the problems that need our attention, but we just may go after such problems with a more balanced outlook.

We can also choose what we want to focus on. We can be the change we want to see. We can work within ourselves to be kinder, show more love, and have more patience. This is an ongoing practice for me, and I am enjoying it. I like myself better. And therefore I am more able to like you better. In this regard I often think of a Bible verse:

“But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, long-suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such things there is no law.” Galatians 6: 22, 23 NKJV

There’s some good stuff to focus on and practice every day.

Love and kindness

Lisa

Originally posted to Life Coach Blog on lisa-andrews-lafoon.com