Things I Think I Know...."Showing Up."

Language is stressful! So much of what we say and mean changes and keeping up with the latest buzz word or phrase takes commitment, endurance and a shortcut on your phone to the Urban Dictionary.

For the past few years, I have heard people talk about "showing up" and I hadn't given it much thought until lately. I mean, I show up somewhere just about every day so I must be doing it correctly. True, I haven't always shown up on time or even at the right location (I have a great story about going to the wrong city in the wrong state for a meeting, but I will save that for a post on Adult ADHD), but I still checked the box by showing up, right?

Well, lately I am getting the impression that the "showing up" that people are referring to is way more complex than what I was giving myself credit for all this time. In fact, I am learning that the type of "showing up" that people are referring to seems to have a lot to do with being "authentic" and bringing my "whole self" to the workplace.

So, one day I decided to give this "showing up" thing a try and dug out an old Metallica t-shirt that I had managed to keep hidden from my wife. Why do I have to hide Metallica t-shirts from my wife? Well, because she seems to think that 30 year old t-shirts don't merit any of the coveted space in our dresser drawers (by the way, it's from the Wherever We May Roam tour in '91 which I had the shame of attending with my mom because she didn't think a 13-year old should travel 50 miles by himself to see a heavy metal band......she was no fun). I also threw on a pair of jeans and my cleanest pair of Vans and proceeded to head out the door to "bring my authentic self" to work.

My wife stopped me and had to explain that this was not what people meant when they used the word "authentic". She also explained that a 46-year-old man who dressed like a 13-year-old boy circa 1991 was a crushing disappointment for a woman who had painstakingly been working to evolve said 46-year-old man over the course of 18 years of marital bliss.

So, back to square one it was. Because I am relatively slow to grasp certain concepts, it took a while to come to the epiphany that "showing up" isn't about me at all... it's about WHO I am showing up for! Once I arrived at that point, I was able to stumble my way to the following possibilities for what might be the best way for me to "show up authentically":

1. Mentally Sharp (Clear-headed, focused, and well-rested.)So, that evening glass of wine that leaves me a bit foggy the next morning (because I have the constitution of a tadpole) .... maybe not.
2. Emotionally Controlled (Ready to engage with clients and colleagues with empathy and understanding.)Not all fired up about the fact that my favorite team spent more money than anyone else in the MLB and still can't beat the little league team the next county over. And, yes, I am a New York Mets fan.
3. Physically Fit (Having the energy and endurance to navigate deadlines, projects and the uncertainty of daily life as a professional in 2024).Not falling asleep at my desk because the most exercise I have gotten lately is the walk from the parking deck to my office.
4. Prepared to Execute (Having a plan that is rooted in helping my team and my clients succeed.)Since I am now ditching the glass of wine and the Mets game; maybe I should plan my next day the night before?
5. Expectant of Change (Making sure that the great plan I wrote last night is flexible enough to survive impact with all of the things I wasn't expecting to happen today.)This is where 1-4 really come together.

While this seems like a pretty good list of ways to authentically show up each day; I still would like to throw the occasional Metallica shirt in to the mix on "casual Fridays".