Things hardly anyone knows about me.

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I do what I do because I spent a large amount of my life not believing in myself, which led me to read over 3000 books out of desperation.?

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I now use what I learned to help transform the lives of others which ironically was what allowed me to change mine.

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I cry at sad films. When I watched “A Field of dreams” I wept so much that my wife thought there was something wrong with me.?

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The scene that did it was the one where he asked his father if he wanted to play catch.

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I spent many years wondering how I would feel when my father died.?

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I thought there were only two possible options.?

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1. That I would be freed from him.?

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2. That I would be devastated?

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As it turned out I was devastated but not for the reasons I thought. I was devastated because somewhere within me at age 42 I was still waiting for him to be a father to me.?

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But now he never would be.?

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I still weep for my father.

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As time has gone by, I miss the family members I’ve lost more and more, and I think I’ve only really come to appreciate them since they have been gone. I wish I’d noticed the special things about them more than I had noticed their faults.

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I don’t recall anyone ever using the word love, but I made sure that I told the family members who were dying how much I loved them before they passed. I didn’t get to say it to everyone. The ones I did wept and told me they loved me too.

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It took me ten years from the time I decided to be a motivational speaker to give my first speech because I didn’t believe I had anything worth saying.

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I feel guilty because I promised my children when they were little that I would build them a big house with a high wall around it with gates. I said I was going to get them a swimming pool with a curly slide and stables for their ponies.?

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I didn’t do it but found out years later that the reason I wanted the high walls was to protect them from the abuse I suffered as a child and to surround them with an impenetrable wall of protection.

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I managed to do that; the mind has its own way of telling us what needs to be done.

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I discovered the secret to ending procrastination when I was 12 years old as I sat on the starting line of a dirt bike race terrified. It works and it is psychologically proven to work.?

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I won the British sand racing championship round in Jersey in 1985 after taking three years off.?

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That year the British championship was over 12 rounds all over the UK. Up until then the British championship was over just one event in Jersey. If I had come back a year earlier, I would have been the British champion.

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I ranked as the top 1% of salespeople in the world.

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I beat cancer in 2012 after being misdiagnosed twice eventually self-diagnosing. I had less than a 20% chance of survival and a 90% chance of a brain tumour within a year if I lived that long.?

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It was fourteen months before I was eventually diagnosed for a cancer that was so aggressive that it needed to be diagnosed and treated within 4/6 weeks. I have been clear 10 years and there isn’t any record of anyone making it to five years with my prognosis.

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I beat cancer primarily by using the techniques I had learned to overcome the abuse I Suffered as a child.?

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Ironically if it hadn’t been for what happened to me, I would never have learned the things I did so my father actually caused me to learn the things that would one day be the largest factor on my survival.

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I am grateful to him for that.

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I wrote my book “An unbreakable spirit” in 30 days. I had to write it that fast as chemotherapy affected my memory so badly, I had to write nonstop so I wouldn’t forget what I had written.

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I survived three attempts on my life. (When two of them are by family members you get a little paranoid?)

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I founded the coaching industry in Jersey, and it was 8 years before another coach set up.

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I tried to join the parachute regiment when I was 18 but was denied as I had been in too much trouble.?

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I was told if I stayed out of trouble for 12 months they would reconsider. I went back a year later but was refused for a minor speeding offence.

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One of the people I admire most in the world is my mother . She worked morning noon and night and endured physical and mental abuse rather than break up her family.

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I met my wife on March 10th 1990.

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When I saw her for the very first time I knew she was going to be my wife and she hadn't even noticed me yet.

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The next day we went for a walk and talked about the things we wanted from life including children.

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We got engaged 28 days after we met on April 11th

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Got married on July 26th (Same year).

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Our first daughter Chloé was a honeymoon baby.

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This year we have been married thirty-three years.

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Or as my wife would say,

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Tirty tree years, she's Irish.

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Moral of the story.

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Never give up on your dreams.

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What you want, wants you.

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But no one ever said it would be easy.

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But it's definitely worthwhile.

#resilience #mentalhealth #business #inspiration #motivation