Things are almost never as simple as they seem!

Things are almost never as simple as they seem!

So first a disclaimer – although rare, I have been known to use an occasional expletive.? Definition of Rare: every other word.

Having found a free hour this morning at 7a.m., I decided to tackle a quick project that desperately needed doing. ?For weeks now, our washer has been leaking water resulting in many wet towels on the floor and a stinky laundry room.? The culprit: a faulty water pump.

Well, thank goodness this would be simple.? I mean, you read these directions and tell me this isn’t a fast fix.? 1. Unplug washer, 2. Remove front panels, 3. Release belt tensioning spring, 4. Remove power harness from motor, 5. Remove belt from bottom of tub, 6. Remove mounting bolts and motor, 7. Loosen pump screws and remove pump from motor, 8. Lubricate motor shaft, 9. Perform steps 7 through 1 in reverse order.

Bored yet?? Well, let me now share with you the actual process.

1. Unplug washer. ?I’m thinking to myself, “Oh yeah, I’m like 10% finished.? At this rate, I’ll be done by 7:05”

2. Remove panels. ?“Glad I had that old socket wrench in the garage.”

3. Release belt tensioning spring.? “Where the hell did I just put that spring?? Ah, whatever, probably don’t even need it.”

4. Remove power harness from motor.? “Really? I wonder if the manufacturer just assumes that anyone performing repairs on their machine is triple-jointed with 7’ arms.”?

5. Remove belt from bottom of tub.? “OK, that was easy.? Oh shit, I bet that’s why I need that belt tensioning spring.? Where did I put that?? I better take a break and collect my thoughts.? Is it too early for a beer?”

6. Remove mounting bolts and motor.? “Thank goodness my finger broke the fall of the 15 lbs. motor.? Wouldn’t want to damage the tile floor.? I wonder if the swelling will impact my ability to put the power harness back on the motor?”?

7. Loosen pump screws and remove pump from motor.? “Pump screws implies screws like Phillips or Flat – NOT some 6 pointed star bullshit that NASA would use.? Size 25 Torx?? Listen, this is a clothes washer not the space shuttle.? Well Home Depot is only a short drive away.? Be back soon… glad I didn’t crack open that beer.”

“I’m back.? So the screws are loose and yet the pump doesn’t want to budge.? Don’t want to bend the motor shaft… must be gentle.? Let me get a flashlight a take a little peek.? Oh God, the shaft is rusted on to the pump.? Need a rust dissolver.? Wasn’t I just at Home Depot?? It’s now 8:30, so I’m only a little behind schedule.”

“So, I’m back – again.? I’ve liberally applied Naval rust remover… without gloves.? Wish I had read the label… something about sulfuric acid.? I’m no doctor but maybe the acid will help with the swelling.”

“Rust is gone but the pump still refuses to come off the motor so it is time to apply some force.? Nothing, and I mean NOTHING is going to get this pump to come off… wait a minute, did I say nothing?? Am I just going to give up?? I’m in it to win it – besides the infusion of acid into my skin is giving me some great motivation to wrap up this project so I can get to the hospital.”

“Enough of this crap!? I break out the 15,000 RPM Dremel with a carbide cutting bit and proceed to cut the pump cover off so I can access the impellor (which is directly attached to the motor shaft).? As I remove the cover, I think, weird, the pump has a red lubricant inside.? I’m thinking, that’s weird it’s a water pump and the water would rinse the lubri – oh fuck, that’s my blood and a lot of it.? Where – where’s the blood coming from?? Oh whew, just a mild laceration to the right thumb.? Not surprisingly, I just happen to have a medical kit – this isn’t my first repair – so one butterfly stitch bandage and we’re good to go.”

“Hold on… I feel lightheaded... acid fumes?? pint of blood loss?? delusions of being handy?? Whatever the cause, I need some juice.? Kimberly’s busy working away so I still have hopes of completing this project, mopping up the blood, and sitting on patio acting all “chill” when she joins me later and me saying something like ‘Oh, that washer repair thing, pssssssh, so easy I forgot I even did that this morning’.? Maybe I should slam 4 Tylenols while I’m drinking my juice.”

“Time to continue cutting the pump off of the motor.? Wait!? I’m I still on step 7?? What time is it?? 10:30?? This is completely ridiculous.? By 11:00 the pump is removed and the shaft now needs to be cleaned and lubricated to receive the new pump.? Here is what the situation looked like…”

The mess!

8. Lubricate motor shaft.? “Did this lubricant really cost $6?? I wonder how the lubricant works at sealing cuts and soothing acid burns?? Label doesn’t say anything about it, but I’m giving it a try.”

9. Perform steps 7 through 1 in reverse order.? “OK, new pump goes on smoothly and washer gets reassembled in about 30 minutes. So I’m done… well, almost… I have to wash some laundry to see if the washer leaks.? By 1p.m. everything is done, tested, and cleaned up!!!”

So why am I writing about this?? Because as I was cleaning up and scrubbing grease out of my cuts I started thinking about this project mirrored so many other experiences in life.? Whether raising children, nurturing a relationship, building a business, maintaining our health, etc. – and the list goes on… I believe that we are often told & sold that (insert your success goal here) is “only x simple steps away”.? Well, the simple truth is the THINGS ARE ALMOST NEVER AS SIMPLE AS THEY SEEM!? If we expect and more importantly, appreciate the value of cuts, bruises, and accidental inhalation of acid fumes then maybe we won’t be disappointed when the inevitable challenges of our endeavors expose our vulnerabilities.? I’m a huge proponent of learning from others but never discount the value of your own trials and tribulations – they are your scars – wear them proudly!? Now off to the E.R.... wonder what they'll share about this experience.? LOL