There's a Simple Way to Overcome Differences

Did you see Jimmy Carter’s funeral? I was surprised to hear the eulogy written by the late Gerald Ford (read by Ford’s son.) The two friends had asked each other to write eulogies years before either had died, and they both fulfilled that promise.

I went back and watched Carter’s eulogy for Ford as well. They didn't start out as friends. In fact, when they ran against each other for President, they exchanged harsh criticisms at the time (pretty tame compared to recent Presidential debates.) Both recalled how their friendship emerged years later when they shared a plane home from Anwar Sadat's funeral. It was then that they realized they shared common concerns, like how to fund their Presidential Libraries. After laughing about that, they discovered their common family values and the importance of faith in their lives.

The start of their unlikely friendship is a great illustration of a persuasive psychology principle identified by Dr. Robert Cialdini. Simply put: finding what we have in common is a proven way to build liking and rapport with someone, even if you don’t get along with them. ?

You don’t have to agree about everything to have a positive relationship. Just look for some common ground to build a bridge with prospects, team members, resources or even people in your personal life.

Can you think of examples where you found something in common with someone you found challenging or didn’t like?