The Tension of the Opposites

When we walk through life with integrity and intention, we are on the lean path, we are walking the red road as the Native Americans say, we are on the hero’s journey.???We are a champion in the true sense of the word.??Originally, “champion” simply meant a “fighter” – specifically one fighting for a nobler cause.??A true champion is not driven by wealth, fame, or legacy, but by purpose.??Those other things may result, but first and foremost is the motivation to realize our true individual and collective potential.?

One of the greatest skills a champion must learn is to hold the tension of the opposites.??This tension provides the pressure needed to enable revelation.??The famous physicist, Nils Bohr, has been quoted to say: “How wonderful that we have met with a paradox; now we have some hope for making progress.” Paradox provides hope for progress because we?must?find a new??understanding of our reality that is not dualistic (either/or) but integrated (both/and).??What is true in science, is also true in leadership.??

?For example, when an organization prides itself on it’s “entrepreneurial spirit” and bristles at attempts to standardize practices or adopt something invented somewhere else, then we find ourselves in a paradox.??How can we realize the benefits of standardization (e.g. scalability, big data, efficiency) and learning from others while still valuing the custom problem solving, unique ways of doing things, and ingenuity of our teams???This requires a shift in perspective.??We either must develop a greater nuanced understanding or a broader integrated understanding – and almost always both.??If we can tolerate the tension between two competing perspectives just a bit longer, then a transcendent third option emerges.??This does not mean that others finally realize that “my plan” was right, but rather that some new insight or idea reveals itself that reconciles the paradox from a technical perspective (i.e. the path forward).??However, there is also the motivational component – for even the best idea will never realize its potential if people are not motivated to change.??

The motivation to walk this new path also comes from this tension.??Once there is a awareness of the paradox, then there is a requisite period of awkwardness - of discomfort for all involved – where that tension needs to build to a point where it forces some sort of shift – not just in thinking – but in behavior.??This is where a champion must tread carefully.??We do not want to relieve that tension prematurely because then - not only do we short change the transformation - but we also end up owning it (instead of getting the team or organization to own it).??We must also not hold the tension too long such that?we?are triggered by that discomfort because then our triggered reactions elicit greater defensiveness from others.??

This phenomenon is true in our professional life as well as personal life - as anyone who has raised children can attest to. Both arenas provide amble opportunities to build our awareness and capacity of how to more skillful navigate this tension.

In my experience, there are three pairs of seemingly opposite characteristics that I would say are central to walking the champion’s path: Persistence and humility, loneliness and faith, and urgency and equanimity.???But more on these next time….